When Past and Present Collide
by Euphrosyne-222
Summary: There are times in your life when like, you swear everything's moving in slow motion, and that if you could just like wish hard enough, life would stop…and you'd just be like…frozen in that moment forever.  Every minute with Jordan Catalano was like that…
1. Chapter 1

There are times in your life when like, you swear everything's moving in slow motion, and that if you could just like wish hard enough, life would stop…and you'd just be like…frozen in that moment forever. Every minute with Jordan Catalano was like that…

5 years ago…

"Kinda like this?" I questioned, holding the guitar awkwardly in front of me.

"No, not really" Jordan chuckled, sitting behind me and wrapping his arms around me. "It's more like…this" he breathed against my neck, adjusting my fingers to the correct position. If I had to be honest, that moment was like the only reason I asked Jordan to teach me how to play.

Jordan and I spent almost every night the summer after our senior year holed up somewhere alone; his room, my room, the loft, parked in his car in the middle of nowhere, as long as we were able to be together we didn't care where we were. High school had given us many hard moments, countless break ups and even more make ups, and now here we were heading in opposite directions in a matter of months, a realization neither of us ever admitted to ourselves. We had decided that we were just going to be together while we could, and deal with August when it came.

"Who taught you how to play" I asked without looking up from the chord I was so desperately trying to perfect.

"No one" he softly answered, pulling my hair to one side of my neck. "I guess it's like…the only thing I've ever been naturally good at" he kissed me softly on the neck and then laughed silently.

"What's so funny?" I smiled turning my head to look him in the eye.

"It's just like…I mean, I guess it's not the only thing I've ever been good at" he joked moving his hand from my hand to the side of my face. He traced my lips with his thumb, and then kissed me softly.

The thing about Jordan's kisses is that they are like soft and sweet one minute, and then like hard and rushed the next. They say so much about him and who he is, that I always end up feeling like he's sharing a part of his soul with me. I loved his kisses.

Present day…

"Angel-food…hello?" Rayanne said trying to grab my attention, "Where's your head at? Come on, we're on in like minutes".

"Sorry," I blushed, putting my guitar down and turning to her "I was just thinking" I sighed and headed to the mirror to fix my hair and makeup.

The fall after we graduated, me, Rayanne and Rickie moved to New York. I was studying writing at NYU and Rayanne was desperately trying to make it on Broadway. She was good, but so were a lot of people, and she was having a real hard time. One night, in an attempt to keep her safe in the apartment instead of some bar down town, Rickie and I convinced her to stay in. I started messing around on the guitar that Jordan gave me as a reminder of him (like anything could ever erase him from my head), and she started singing. Somehow things clicked, and we spent more and more time creating our own sound. It started as a way for me to keep a piece of Jordan with me, but after a while it became more about the music and what I was creating with my best friends. We started playing for the public, dive bars mostly at first, and then it just snowballed into this real band that people were requesting to hear. We were signed a year later, and I dropped out of school to tour Europe the following spring. Now back home for the first time in two years, I was finding it harder and harder to keep my thoughts off the boy who started the whole thing years ago in the loft. Jordan had found his own success with music in LA, but on opposite sides of the world, we slowly lost touch.

"I thought you were going to stop doing this to yourself" Rayanne sighed and sat down at the mirror with me.

"I know, I just…I can't make myself get rid of that guitar" I sighed "besides, I've written some of our best stuff on it. It's like, magical".

"You're talent isn't tied to him" she said grabbing my shoulders and forcing me to look her in the eyes "I know that you guys don't have the sense to either commit or cut each other loose, but you have to stop torturing yourself. I'm worried about you".

"Rayn…" I started only to be interrupted by Rickie running into the room.

"What are you two still doing in here; you should be backstage like yesterday. Ange-don't forget that you guys changed the intro to the encore number, Raynie-I had them fix the lighting so no more excuses to forgetting the bridge for the cover. Go, go, go…" he demanded pushing us out of the dressing room.

As far as tour managers were concerned, Rickie was the best. He was firm with Rayanne, knowing exactly how to reign in her wild side, and he was gentle with me, spending many late nights talking with me on the bus as we drove from city to city. He became this surrogate boyfriend for me, attending many events with me as my date, supplying all the emotional benefits of a boyfriend without all the complications of putting your heart on the line. His partner Alex was wonderfully understanding, and found a connection with Rayanne as a recovering addict himself. The four of us became this family of support and love that we rarely ventured out of.

"Did you tell her yet?" Alex asked finding Rickie pacing the hallway outside of the dressing room.

"No" he said hugging Alex and not letting him go "How am I supposed to tell her that their bands were just picked up for a joint summer tour? I mean, they're not even the same genre, I didn't think this would ever happen. Maybe I can still get them out of it" Rickie sighed pulling away from Alex and getting his Blackberry out of his pocket.

"It's a benefit tour honey," Alex soothed, taking Rickie's phone and putting it in his pocket. "There's going to be like 20 different bands there, and all the proceeds are going to amazing causes. This is important for Rayne."

"I know I just worry about Angela. Her heart is already so exposed; I don't want her to get hurt"

"I love you for that, but you can't protect her forever." Alex whispered.

"I can try though" Rickie replied, allowing himself to be wrapped up in Alex's embrace.


	2. Chapter 2

**I hadn't planned on putting this one up so soon, but I'm so excited about getting the story moving and as a thank you to Gagirl29 and danigirl2259 for giving me such nice reviews on my first ever fanfic, I decided to put up the second chapter tonight. I'm doing my best to stay ahead of this story so that I can keep the updates constant, but it'll be a little bit longer before the next chapter is updated. Thanks again, and I hope you like this one as well… **

_Sometimes it feels like these last 5 years were some big dream, and if I close my eyes for a split second I could be back in Three Rivers, working at the garage, singing with the Embryos, and waking up next to Angela. I don't think that would be so bad, in fact…I'd trade anything for just one morning waking up with her curled up so innocently in my arms…_

"So I think that we should try and rework that transition from the chorus into the third verse again, it feels rushed" Jordan said attempting to rub the sleep from his eyes.

The band had locked themselves in his in home studio in an attempt to work out the last few kinks in their new record. Shane and Caleb thought that the record sounded great, but Jordan didn't want great. This record meant more to him than the previous three they had already put out and he wanted it to sound amazing.

"Jordan, the transition is fine" Shane yawned, standing up from his drums and moving to lay on the couch in the corner of the room. "It's been worked and reworked to death. If we change it one more time I'm going to stab myself in the eye with my sticks".

"I just want to make sure it's perfect before we send it out." Jordan replied, finally succumbing to his own exhaustion and collapsing into the chair behind him.

"Dude, this whole album is amazing; and I'm not just saying that so you'll finally unlock the doors and let us see the light of day" Caleb joked, grabbing a water and checking his phone. "My wife just sent me a picture of our baby and I swear I didn't even recognize her. We need to step away from this record or we are going to ruin it".

"You're right" Jordan finally conceded. "You guys go ahead and get out of here, I'm just gonna chill in here for a little bit"

"Bro, stop it" Shane said from his unmoving spot on the couch after Caleb had left. "I can hear you pining from over here"

"No one asked you to stay Shane" Jordan huffed, attempting to throw a pillow at Shane, unfortunately his exhaustion was getting the best of him and it landed on the floor about two feet short of his target.

"You didn't have to ask" Shane replied, grabbing the pillow and placing it under his head. "I know you're worried about seeing her again, especially since this whole album is basically one giant love letter to her; but it had to happen sooner or later".

"I've been dreaming about her again" Jordan admitted almost to himself more than to Shane "They're these weird dreams, where everything is silent and it's just me and her, and there's no color anywhere except her bright red hair. Then all of the sudden, we're back in the loft and I'm playing her one of my songs and it's almost as if she's forgiven me for everything cause she's crying but it's like happy crying. And I go to touch her, to hold her to me and my hands go right through her. I just keep chasing her cause I know I just need to feel her, but I can't." tears were threatening to fall from Jordan's eyes but he knew he needed to get this out. "She was the best part me, and I messed that up. If this record could be like, just right…she'd have to know right…how much a part of me she is, right?"

"Want to run through the acoustic set one more time" Shane offered. He hated seeing his friend like this, and he knew that the only thing that ever took his mind away from everything was playing. As tired as he was, Shane stood up and grabbed his acoustic guitar and sat back down.

"Thanks" Jordan said, throwing his friend a grateful smile.

4 years ago…

_There are times when everything is perfect, and you're just so happy that you can't see the darkness looming in the distance…_

"Ew...this movie is so creepy" Angela squealed and buried herself further into Jordan's embrace "tell me why I agreed to watch this with you again?"

"Because you love me" Jordan laughed, tightening his grip on her "and besides, I don't really have a lot of other options. Shane and I have been on a horror movie kick lately so that's all we have in the house. We could go out if you'd like, do some sightseeing while you're here" he suggested.

"NO!" Angela exclaimed holding on tighter to Jordan "I'm only here for three days. I don't want to have to share you with anyone"

"Do you want me to turn it off?" he offered pulling the blankets tighter around them, cocooning them even further into the couch.

"No, because I do love you. So much that I'll watch this really creepy movie if it's what makes you happy" she smiled and kissed his cheek.

"You make me happy" he whispered in her ear.

"I've missed you so much" Angela cooed turning away from the TV altogether and focusing her attention solely on Jordan. "Promise me this isn't forever, that someday you and I are going to be together again. Cause I just can't…"

"Hey" he cut her off "I love you. Everything I do, everything I am is because of you. I know things are, less than ideal right now, but that doesn't change anything. I'm going to love you forever, I promise you that"

Jordan kissed her, and then pulled away to look her in the eyes. "I have something for you" he said a little embarrassed. "I was going to wait until later, I had this whole thing kind of planned out, but seeing as we've decided to spend your entire stay in the house" he reached into his pocket and pulled out a little silver band that matched the one he wore "I've been thinking, and I don't know if this means that we're like going steady" he tried to joke "but I want you to wear this, and know that I wear mine for you. We're going to figure this out someday, and when that day comes, I hope to make it official" he said placing the ring on her finger. Angela kissed him through the tears spilling from her eyes, and they spent the rest of the weekend on that couch.


	3. Chapter 3

**I had a good day today so I decided to update again…I'm glad to see that you guys are enjoying my idea, and I hope that you all stick with me for the whole thing. I'm on chapter 9 right now. I don't have a definite end in mind; I think I'm just going to let it flow until it stops working. I'm trying to get about a chapter a day written, maybe more on the weekends. So, thanks again for all the reviews they make me happy when I open my email and see that they're there. **

_Have you ever had one of those fights that last so long and gets so intense that they start to take on a life of their own, and like after a while you forget how it all started and the fight like starts having you?_

6 years ago…

"I wasn't looking at him!" I yelled, slamming my locker and attempting to move around him "He asked to barrow a pen, and I gave him one. He made a joke and I laughed. That's it!"

"It looked a whole lot different than that" Jordan growled, pinning me against the lockers so I couldn't escape. "He's like, my best friend Ange…"

"Exactly! He's your best friend, and I'm your girlfriend; why would you even think either of us would do that to you?" I defended myself, pulling my books against my chest and refusing to look him in the eye.

"Well, what else did you expect you to think huh?" Jordan moved so he was standing next to me, leaning against the lockers and closing his eyes.

"I don't expect you to think anything" I bit at him "I'd just hoped that you thought a little bit more about me then to think that I would ever do anything like that, especially to you"

Jordan didn't say anything to that. He looked me in the eye, then pushed himself off the wall and took off towards the parking lot. I sighed and headed in the opposite direction towards our English class. I don't know what was going on with us lately. It seemed like if it wasn't one thing it was another, we were constantly fighting and spending less and less time together. Usually we just fought about stupid things; he was late picking me up in the morning, I couldn't make it to the loft for their practice, he ate the last slice of pizza; but this fight was bigger. He'd come around the corner from shop class and saw Shane standing at my locker and I was laughing at some joke he'd made about a run in he'd had with Sharon, and he just lost it. Sliding into a desk in the back of class I laid my head down and sighed. It was all becoming so hard, and I couldn't understand. Loving someone should be easier than this.

"What's up Chase, where's Catalano?" Shane asked sitting at the desk to my right.

"Sulking in the parking lot I think" I answered, sitting up and meeting Shane's questioning look. "He saw you at my locker before class and he thinks we're messing around behind his back" I explained.

"What?" he said. "How could he even think that?" he sounded a little insulted.

"Beats me" I sighed, "I just don't know how to even fix this one. I mean, I told him that it was nothing, but it was like he was trying not to believe me, ya know? It's like he wants to fight with me, and I don't know how I can stop it if he's so set on it. I just feel like he's hiding something; maybe he's just tired of me or something" I said starting to cry.

"Look," Shane said getting up from his seat and standing in from of my desk "I wouldn't worry about it. I've been friends with him like, forever and I know that he's not always so good at talking about what's on his mind, but you have to know that he's completely gone when it comes to you. I just think he's scared and instead of just saying that, he's trying to give you a reason to be scared too."

"Where are you going?" I asked watching him head to the door.

"The parking lot" he shrugged, "I've got a few words to have with our little Jordan".

Present day…

"Rickie this tour sounds amazing" I said leaning against the seat on the back of the bus. It was late, and as per usual, he and I were the only ones still awake. Often times after Rayanne and Alex had gone to bed, we would head to the seats in the back and talk about what was on our minds. It was one of my favorite parts of the day.

"Yeah, I know that Rayanne is real excited about getting to play for such a good cause" Rickie said, sounding a little hesitant. "But, uh…well you see, there's kind of a little catch that I don't really know how to bring up"

"Are you worried about her partying again?" I asked, guessing that's probably what's been eating at him for the last few days. "Cause we're all here for her, and she's been doing so amazing. Besides, there just comes a time when you have to stop trying to protect her and let her make mistakes." I reasoned.

"It's just hard you know" he said "knowing that someone you care about so much is about to walk into something and you can't stop it. I mean, if you see the cliff what's so bad about pulling them back before they walk off the edge"

"Rickie-" I said, getting up from my seat across from him and sitting down next to him. Putting my arm around his shoulder I continued on "You are one of the greatest people I know. You care about us more than anyone ever has, and no one would fault you if something goes wrong. You can't be responsible for us all the time. Sometimes we're going to make the wrong decision, or we're going to get hurt, but that's just a part of life. We'll still love you" I confirmed.

"Do you ever think about it? What life would have been like if he'd never cheated on you?" Rickie questioned in a whisper.

Taking a deep breath, I took my arm from around his shoulder and slouched in my seat so I could rest my head against his shoulder. "Every day, and even though I understand what happened and why he did it, it happened. There's nothing that could have been done to stop it".

"But if I would have been with you that day" he said starting to cry "If it would have been you and me that the tabloids caught walking hand in hand into that jewelry store instead of Alex, then he wouldn't have thought you were cheating, and he wouldn't have gotten drunk and slept with that actress. You guys would have made it, and you'd be happy. It's all my fault"

"No" I said comforting, wiping the tears from his eyes "It's not your fault at all" I said, allowing a tear to escape my eyes for the first time in years "This had to do with Jordan and me, and if it hadn't been that day that they caught me with Alex, they would have eventually. I never for one second blamed you"

"I'm so sorry" Rickie said hugging me close to him "I just wish you never had to go through that"

"I know, but it's ok" I said, getting my composer and wiping my eyes. "See life continued on. I fell off the cliff, but I'm still alive"

"You're my best friend Ange"

"And you're mine" I said.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4.**

_There are three things I regret in life. The first, is taking so long to stand up to my abusive father. The second was believing that I was worthless for so long. But the thing I regret more than anything else in my life was the day I picked up that tabloid in line at the grocery store…_

2 years ago…

"Whoa, slow down man" Shane warned, attempting to get the attention of the bartender and get Jordan cut off before he did something stupid.

"Maybe I don't want to slow down, huh?" Jordan yelled over the loud music. "Maybe I want to get so drunk that I forget she ever existed. That these last 6 years never happened." He pushed Shane away and ordered another drink.

"Man, all I'm saying is that it might not be what it looks like" he said, grabbing the drink from Jordan's hands and holding it out of his reach. "You know how these magazines are. They twist everything around in order to sell copies. Hell, last week they said that I have like 4 kids with some stripper in Vegas. I've never even been to Vegas!" he reasoned.

"There were pictures Shane" Jordan roared, finally grabbing the beer from his friend and sitting down facing away from the bar. "Some guy had his hands on her and they were going into a jewelry store." He took a long draw, finishing off his beer and ordering another. "I always knew that she would figure out that she was better off without me, but I thought she'd at least have the decency to end it with me before she moved on."

"Look, all I'm saying is that you should at least talk to her first" Shane suggested, attempting to close Jordan's tab so he could get him out of the bar and back home where it would be safe. "She can probably explain this to you-"

"Explain it to me? Like I'm too stupid to figure this one out on my own man" Jordan yelled, grabbing Shane by the collar and pushing him away "Just get out of my face and stop following me around for like 5 minutes. It's about time you figured out how to have a life without me"

"Fine," Shane answered, finally getting mad himself "I'll leave you alone. But you remember this, I tried. And when you mess this up, cause we all know that's what's coming, don't even think about coming and crying about it to me. Cause I don't care anymore" Shane stormed out of the club, leaving Jordan alone to drink himself stupid.

Jordan really didn't want to be here. He hated going to clubs probably more than anything, especially clubs in LA. They were always crowded and full of celebrities trying to get an easy lay, or people wanting to sleep with celebrities. But after he read that article for like the 100th time that day, all he wanted was to drink until the images were burned from his mind. He knew that Shane was just trying to help, but there was no way he could possibly understand. Angela wasn't just a casual hook up gone wrong, an area that Shane held much expertise in, she was his. He had been the only one that she had ever been with, the only one that she had ever let touch her intimately, and she was the only person he had ever truly loved. All it took to send everything spiraling down where those three pictures. He felt sick just thinking about somebody else touching her, and that's when the drinking started.

"Hey, you're Jordan Catalano right" a girl Jordan vaguely recognized asked. He nodded and turned his attention back to his drink, hoping she would get the hint and just leave. She didn't. "I'm Ashley, I met you once a while ago, and I'm a friend of Caleb's"

"Right, the actress" Jordan finally placed her in his mind. She was pretty he guessed, he definitely could see the reason she was so successful. He looked a little surprised when she sat down next to him and took a drink of his beer.

"I hate coming to these clubs, but my agent swears it's the best way to keep my name in the air you know" she offered, even though he didn't ask. "What's up with you, you look like someone just kicked your puppy"

"Not really anything I want to talk about, least of all with you" Jordan bit, finally starting to feel the alcohol attack his brain in a wave. All he wanted right now was to be alone; unfortunately she wasn't taking the hint.

"These places are so boring" she said, turning around so she was facing the crowd with her arms leaning on the bar "and there's never anyone here worth talking to" she eyed Jordan, but decided to continue on "the game is just starting to get a little old, ya know?"

"Why don't you just stop coming then" Jordan asked, if the girl wasn't going to leave, at least he'd could hold up a meaningless conversation.

"And do what about my agent?" she questioned, raising her eyebrows and shaking her head "You know how all this works; you came here for the exact same reason I did" she challenged.

"I could care less about why you came here," Jordan snarled, dropping some cash on the bar and getting up from his seat "don't presume you know me, ok"

"I'm not presuming anything" she said, standing up and meeting his eye "All I'm saying, is that if you weren't looking for an easy lay tonight, then you would have just got drunk at home"

"I'm not-"Jordan started only to be interrupted.

"Yeah you are," she scoffed "The way I see it, there's only two scenarios as to why you're here. 1. You're pissed at someone and hoping the papers will catch you out, or 2. You're feeling lazy and are hoping one of these random groupies will do you in the back alley." She spat, watching the anger boil to the surface on Jordan's face. "So I hit a nerve did I? So tell me Mr. Tough-guy rocker, who pissed you off so bad?"

"So what if I'm mad, it's not like it's any of your business" he said heading for the door while being followed by Ashley.

"There's nothing wrong with being mad at someone" she said, turning him around to face her, "All I'm saying is if that's the case, at least have the sense enough to use your fame to your advantage."

"What does that mean?" he questioned getting more annoyed by this girl by the minute.

"I can't believe I have to spell this out to you," she replied rolling her eyes, "If you really want to make some girl notice you're pissed, the best way to do that is to be photographed with another girl" she spoke slowly.

"Who said anything about a girl?" he pressed, trying his best to hide the truth in what she said.

"Please, there's always a girl with guys like you" she said, starting to turn and head back into the bar.

Jordan wasn't sure what made him do it, but he grabbed her arm and spun her around. "Want to get out of here?" he mumbled.

"Sure, being attached to you in the papers tomorrow will definitely shut my agent up for a while" she said, grabbing his hand and leading him to the front.

"Let's go out the back," he stalled trying to gain control. He knew what would happen if the paparazzi caught them together, but something in the back of his mind told him it was more about not wanting to hurt Angela.

"Please, we're not going to sleep together for fun, this is strictly a business arrangement" she said, pulling him out the door and into the waiting sea of flash bulbs. Turning just before they reached the curb, Ashley grabbed the back of Jordan's head and kissed him like they'd been doing this for years. He wanted to stop, but at the same time he just wanted to forget about the events of today, and if tomorrow Angela saw these pictures then maybe she would understand exactly how he felt.

Present day…

Jordan paced up and down the halls in his house anxiously waiting for his doorbell to ring. It was only 10 minutes past 3, so they weren't that late. He was honestly surprised when he got the call from Rickie saying he wanted to meet up with him before the tour kicked off next week in LA. His house was buzzing with friends and family who had all come over for their traditional fare well BBQ the band threw before each tour. Usually he'd be kicking back by the pool, watching Shane chase his nieces and nephews around or helping Caleb man the grill, but today just sitting there waiting was making him nervous.

"Still no sign of him?" Shane questioned coming in from outside.

"No" Jordan mumbled, sitting down on the couch and putting his feet on the coffee table "It's only 3:15 though, and you know how traffic can be" he said making an excuse for Rickie's tardiness.

"Look man," Shane started, "I want to have good thoughts about this, but I also want you to be ready in case it doesn't turn out so good" Shane sat down on the coffee table and looked at Jordan for a sign that it was ok to continue. "It's just that, well…it's been two years; and really there's no telling what he's coming here to say you know. I just want you to know that Caleb and me, we're here for you if you want to like talk or something. I don't want you to think that we won't listen if that's what you need"

"Thanks man" Jordan said "But right now, I have to believe that it's a good sign that he's coming. I mean, I wish it were her, but I'll take what I can get for now."

As if on cue, the doorbell rang and Jordan froze. This was a moment that could potentially set the ball rolling for him and Angela, and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't scared of messing things up. After a minute of looking at the door, Shane got up and went to answer it for his friend.

"Well, well, well…Graff I always knew you'd come find me someday sweetheart" Shane joked after finding Rayanne standing next to Rickie on the doorstep.

"Am I really that transparent" Rayanne rolled her eyes and looked to Rickie for backup. After not receiving any she pushed past him and entered the house only to be met by a very scared looking Jordan at the end of the hallway. "Catalano" she nodded.

"Rayanne" Jordan swallowed. He wasn't sure why, but he felt like he was looking into the eyes of the firing squad that had been sent to finish him off. "Rickie" he nodded "You guys find the house ok?" Jordan couldn't believe how stupid he sounded. Of course they found the house ok, they were here weren't they?

"Uh, yeah" Rickie stumbled "Sorry we're late, we uh kind of had trouble getting Angela out of the house. She uh, doesn't know we're here, so…" he trailed off, regretting ever asking Jordan if they could meet up instead of just doing this over the phone.

"Oh, ok" Jordan didn't know why he felt so hurt by that statement, but he felt like he had just been punched in the gut.

"Alright," Shane said clearing the tension in the air "As fun as this is, I'm gonna head back out there and grab some food, Graff?" he said, offering her an escape as well.

"I'm always down for food" she said following behind Shane, stopping just even with Jordan "Look, she's out with Alex, so if you see any more pictures of her and him, just try and keep it in your pants this time" she warned before following Shane into the backyard.

"I guess I deserve that" Jordan sighed, gesturing for Rickie to follow him to the living room.

"Don't mind Raynie" Rickie said, sitting in a chair as far from Jordan as he could get "She's just a little protective. I guess we all are, and that's kind of why I'm here"

"I figured" Jordan said sinking farther into his spot on the couch "Look, I know that I royally messed up, but I'm so sorry and-"

"Jordan, I'm not here for that" Rickie interrupted. "I just wanted to come and talk to you so that I know where your head is so that I can prepare her for what she's about to walk into. Right now, she's completely unaware that you guys are even signed on for this tour, and I just need to figure out what to say to her that's going to cause the least amount of pain"

"She doesn't know?" Jordan questioned "We've been on like every talk show about this tour"

"We've only just got back from their European tour last week" Rickie explained. "When I found out that you guys were one of the bands, I did my best to ensure that she never saw anything that would give it away"

"Does she ever talk about me" Jordan asked, hating that he sounded so weak, but he had to know.

"Sometimes" Rickie answered honestly "But it's hard for her. Sometimes we'll pass by something that reminds her of you, and she'll get this look on her face…like she's remembering some moment you shared, and she'll tear up and just when I think she's finally going to cry, she'll pull herself together and it's like nothing ever happened"

"Shane says I do that too" Jordan smiled "Like yesterday, we were on our way to the movies and there was this poster for this scary movie about spiders and it made me remember that trip she took over here,"

"You miss her?" Rickie questioned already knowing the answer.

"Every day." Jordan answered without skipping a beat. "I feel like I've lost a part of me. Like one of my arms was cut off or something"

"If you hurt her again" Rickie warned unsure of what to say next. "Just be careful" he pleaded.


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's the next chapter. I hope you guys still like the story. 3girlsmom-I hope the chapter lengths are better for you, from here on out they run about this length if not longer. **

**Chapter 5.**

_There are times in life when I feel like, completely at peace. Like when I'm surrounded by my friends or after I eat like a really good dessert. When I don't have any complications clouding my mind or when I get to sleep in and wake up to the sound of Rickie and Alex laughing in the kitchen. These moments are addictive, and I find myself chasing that feeling everyday…_

"You can't be serious" I laughed, taking a bite off my ice cream cone.

"Don't laugh," Alex chuckled, licking the side of my ice cream as well, "It was the most embarrassing moment of my life"

"What did you do" I asked.

"What could I do?" He hid his face in his hands before turning to look at me. "I put my clothes back on and ran out of the room" He started laughing slightly, and pulled Angela along with him into a shop "He was really sweet about it afterwards though, and that's when I knew you know. How completely head over heels in love with him I was" Alex blushed a little and started looking through the racks.

"That's sweet," I sighed.

Alex and I had spent the afternoon shopping and grabbing a late lunch. I had a sinking feeling that this was all a ploy to keep me busy. Ever since we set foot in LA, the three of them had been buzzing around me, like they were scared that I was going to collapse under the weight of the situation; but if I had to be completely honest, there was something almost comforting knowing that I was in the same city as him. I found myself looking for him everywhere we went, like if I just thought about him enough he would just materialize in front of me. He hadn't, but I deeply wished he would.

"What do you think about this one" Alex joked, putting an awful feathery hat on his head and posing like he was on the runway.

"Fabulous" I laughed.

"Angela?" a female voice Alex didn't recognize called out from behind us. "Angela?" she called again.

Turning around I was met with a woman that I hadn't seen in years. "Lindsay" I smiled.

"Oh my gosh!" she squealed pulling me into a giant hug, "It's been ages! How have you been?"

"Pretty good," I replied uncomfortably. "We just got back last week, and we're still trying to get back into the swing of things." Tucking my hair behind my ears I grabbed Alex's arm and attempted to get the attention off of me "Lindsay, this is my friend Alex; Alex, this is Lindsay, Caleb's wife" I let out the breath I was holding as it finally occurred to Alex who she was.

"Nice to meet you" he said, shaking her hand and then fidgeting uncomfortably beside me.

"You too." She smiled, "So are you excited about this tour?" she questioned sweetly.

"Um, yeah" I smiled, "It's going to be amazing, especially since we've been gone for so long, it's going to be nice to just be home for a while you know?" She nodded.

"Well I'm glad I ran into you" she said, shifting the bags she was carrying to her other hand. "Sorry I can't stay and catch up with you, but I have to get back, umm…"she reached into her purse and pulled out her phone, "I know you're only in town for another week, but let me get your number and we can meet up before you leave" she handed me her phone so I could put in my number. She continued on while I fumbled with her phone, "I'm not going to be able to make it to the first few cities, but I think I'll be catching up with you guys in Chicago."

"Chicago?" I questioned, unsure about what she was talking about.

"Yeah," she said placing her phone back into her bag "Caleb wanted me to come on the whole tour, but I just had stuff I had to finish around here first; but Chicago is only two weeks in, so I'll be around for most of the tour." She pulled me into another hug, and I shot a questioning glance at Alex who had suddenly found an interest in his shoes, "I'm so glad we ran into each other. It was nice to meet you Alex" she smiled and headed out to the street and out of sight.

"You wouldn't happen to have any idea what that was about would you" I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

"I don't know if I should be the one you're talking about this with" Alex staled, leaving the store and walking down the street towards our car.

"Alex," I stopped him looking straight into his eyes "Please, stop treating me like I'm breakable. Tell me what's going on" I pleaded.

"They're band is on the tour as well." Alex bowed his head, embarrassed that he was caught keeping this secret from me.

"What were you guys planning on doing huh?" I could feel the tears coming to the surface at an alarming rate, "Were you just gonna hide me in a closet anytime he came near?" Alex flinched at my outburst, and opened his mouth to say something only to realize he had nothing to say. "Does everyone know?" I questioned, suddenly feeling very stupid, Alex looked pained as he realized exactly what they had been doing. "Great," I chuckled "Glad to know you guys think so much of me" tossing the keys at him I headed off in the other direction "Go ahead and take the car, I'm just gonna grab a cab".

1 year ago…

The band had just finished a show in Paris and everyone was asleep on the bus but me. I was sitting at the table watching the road move as the bus headed to the next city. We'd been on tour for a year, and as amazing as it was; part of me was ready to be home. Not New York home, but home, home. I couldn't help but see everything that was happening as a blessing and a curse at the same time. It had been almost a year since the last time I'd seen Jordan, and the more time that passed the harder it was to forget him.

I hadn't cried since the day I learned about his affair. It was like I was afraid that crying would mean it was real, and I'd have to admit that we were no longer together; that we never would be together again. We had texted each other randomly, entirely in secret of course because I was afraid of telling Rayanne and Rickie that he was still a presence in my life; but it was all just a way to prolong the ending. I wasn't ready to say goodbye to him anymore than he was to me.

I'd become like a woman obsessed. I'd wait until late, when no one else was awake, and then I'd go on YouTube and watch interviews of his band or performances that fans had uploaded. Sometimes they were funny, and I'd laugh along with him and Shane joking around. Sometimes it was sad, like when I'd see an acoustic performance and he looked so pained. I'd imagine where we'd be at that exact moment if that event last year hadn't happened. Maybe we'd be living together, or we'd schedule our tours around each other and we'd be crammed into one of the tiny bunks in one of our buses. The what if's kept me awake most nights and in a daze during the afternoons. It was all I could do to keep my composer around everyone, even though I knew they could see past the façade.

My dreams of Jordan were always eerily honest. Sometimes we'd fight; we'd yell and scream and slam doors, but we always made up. Sometimes, I would just dream about us together, walking the streets with his arm slung lazily around my shoulder; there'd be no sound, it was just…us. Those were my favorites, the ones that just felt so amazing that I'd wake up and I couldn't tell if they were real or not. The problem with these dreams was that I'd always figure out after some that they weren't real. That no amount of sleep was going to make him appear in front of me; not matter how much I wished otherwise. I started sleeping less, at least when I was awake I my heart couldn't lie to my brain.

When my phone rang around 2:30 I wasn't surprised. Hesitating for only a minute, I finally reached across the table and picked up. "Hey" I whispered.

"Hey" he voice was deep and scratchy, the way it always is late at night after he'd just played a show.

"Where are you?" I asked standing up and grabbing some ice cream from the fridge.

"Capetown. You"

"Just outside of Paris." I answered shoving a spoonful of pistachio ice cream in my mouth. "It's late, and everyone is sleeping and-"

"And you're eating ice cream and playing on the internet" Jordan continued with a smile in his voice.

"Don't pretend like you know me" I giggled even though he knew me better than anyone in the world.

"I can't help it, it's part of who you are." He sighed, he sounded tired, and from the way he looked in the last few videos I watched, he was running himself into the ground.

"You should be sleeping" I scolded. "You're going to get sick if you don't start taking care of yourself"

"Thanks mom" he laughed "I'll rest up next week. Our tour ends and then we'll be home for a while working on our next album"

"That's not much of a break for you though" I interjected "You know how you get when you go into the studio. Promise me you'll take care of yourself" I asked as more of a demand than a suggestion.

"I promise" he yawned "It's great to hear your voice"

"You too," I whispered, putting down my spoon no longer feeling hungry.

"What time is it there?" he asked, yawning deeply into the phone.

"A little past 3am" I said, checking the clock on my computer before putting the ice cream away.

"Same here" he sighed. "This is the first time we've been in the same time zone for years" he chuckled softly.

I looked out the window and glanced at the moon. "Do you remember that time that we all went camping right after graduation?"

He laughed lightly, "it rained like, the whole weekend" he smiled at the memory.

"All except for that hour around 3 o'clock" I said, recalling the memory even more clearly. "We laid on the hood of your car, staring at the moon…like it would go somewhere if we stopped" the moon outside the bus began to blur behind my tears.

Jordan sighed, "Where did we go wrong, Ange?"

"Do you ever wonder" I questioned, "like how we would have turned out if…" I choked on the words; unable to say what he knew was coming next.

"I think that we would have been happy" he said sadly, "Like, really happy."

"Me too" We sat in silence for almost an hour. He was cooking and I could hear him moving around and then settling into his bunk. I was writing, and he'd chuckle a little when he'd hear me groan when I couldn't get a line to work out right. His breathing started to slow into a soothing rhythm around 4:00, and just before I was about to hang up the phone thinking he'd fallen asleep, he started humming this melody. It was beautiful and soft and then he stopped and whispered that he loved me. I choked out a goodbye and hung up the phone.

I cried myself to sleep that night. I also stopped answering his calls.


	6. Chapter 6

**Here's the next chapter…although I don't know if anyone is still reading this, but I'm going to keep posting until the story is done. So, if you're reading this, then I hope you enjoy….**

**Chapter 6.**

_Sometimes life gets so repetitive that I can go a whole week without having to think at all…and then one thing will change and it's like my mind can't figure out what to do next, cause like…the pattern was thrown off. _

Present day…

"The tour is a really amazing idea" Jordan repeated for the 10th time that day. He was in the middle of the press circuit for the tour with a few other guys from some of the other bands. They were sitting down with an afternoon radio show, and answering the same questions from the previous interviews. He kept checking his watch, 15 more minutes and then he could head home. Sometimes he hated being the front man, he was never much of a talker, and it was Shane and Caleb who got off easy. They only had to do half the interviews, and even when they were there it was him that had to do the majority of the talking.

"So Jordan," the interviewer started, bringing the conversation back to him "I hear that you guys have a new album set to come out near the end of this tour, can you tell us a little bit about it?"

"Yeah" Jordan cleared his throat and started on his normal speech "It's been a long time coming, but we've decided to do an acoustic album, the entire thing was recorded at my house so it has a very intimate feel. It's mostly new stuff, but we've also thrown in a few old songs and a cover that is a surprise. We're very excited about it"

"That sounds great. Rumor has it that this album was inspired by a specific person, can you comment on that?" the interviewer pressed.

"It's about love and loss, and battling after you've come to the end of your rope. I hope that everyone who hears these songs can use them and interpret them into their own lives." Jordan answered, hoping that would be the end of the question.

"So you didn't have someone in mind when you wrote it?" he asked.

"Of course I did," Jordan said getting a little agitated "Lyrics are about life and real moments; but just because I wrote about intimate experiences doesn't mean I want to share the details with the world. She'll know who she is and that's enough for me"

"Fair enough," the interviewer said, picking up on the tension radiating from Jordan. He quickly moved the interview to another band and steered clear of Jordan for the rest of the afternoon.

After finishing with the interview and taking a few photos with some fans he headed out back to find Caleb waiting for him.

"Hey man" he said getting in the car "What are you doing here? I thought Shane was going to pick me up"

"Yeah, I guess he got tied up or something, so he called to see if I could pick you up instead" Caleb replied, pulling away from the curb and heading towards Jordan's house.

"Ok, well thanks man" Jordan replied, leaning back in his seat and pulling out his phone. He'd texted Angela that morning asking if they could get together before Friday, but he still hadn't heard from her, and it was starting to aggravate him. Sighing deeply, he put it back in his pocket and started chewing on his thumb, a nervous habit he'd picked up in middle school.

"Something bothering you?" Caleb asked, watching his friend out of the corner of his eye.

Jordan stopped chewing on his thumb, and turned to face Caleb. "It's just…like every time I start to think that things are going to work themselves out," he shook his head "I just don't know what I'm supposed to do, you know-to make everything better".

"Uh, can…can I talk to you about something?" Caleb questioned nervously. When Jordan nodded he continued. "I never told you this, but me and Lindsay we actually broke up for about year right before we got engaged."

"What?" Jordan looked at him quizzically "I thought you guys had been together since middle school. You're like…the perfect couple"

"Well, I mean, it's not something that either of us are really proud of so we don't really talk about it that much." Seeing that Jordan was a still confused he continued on "We had just graduated high school, and we moved in together because that was what was expected for us. She was figuring out how to start her fashion line, and I was auditioning for every band that I could get my hands on. I had always known that she was the only girl for me. It wasn't even a question that I was going to propose, I mean I had had the ring since junior year of high school.

Anyway, I guess she found it one day when she was doing laundry and she just freaked out. I got home from work and she wasn't home which was weird because we always told each other whenever we went somewhere. I was getting worried the later it got, and my mind started going to all these horrible places. I was calling all of our friends; I just didn't know what to do. She finally came back at like 4:30, and she was crying and she was still really drunk. It took me hours to get her to calm down enough for her to tell me what was wrong. Turns out, she was so freaked out by the ring that she went to a bar and went home with some random guy. She said that it meant nothing, that she was just so scared that she wasn't ready that she wanted to do something to prove that she wasn't good enough for me. I asked her to move out after that. I couldn't even look at her. We didn't talk for like 8 months; and it was the longest 8 months of my life."

"What happened?" Jordan asked, amazed that all this had happened. He knew how they were with each other, and it completely blew his mind that they had this piece of history that no one ever knew about.

"One night, a mutual friend of ours had a party and we both ended up there. We spent the entire night talking on the balcony. I hadn't stopped loving her; and that night I knew that I never would. I proposed the next week." He laughed a little at himself. "It was the dumbest smart thing I've ever done."

"Why are you telling me this?" Jordan asked, glad to listen but confused as to its meaning.

"I know how torn up you are about the whole Angela thing; but I just want you to know, coming from someone who's been in her shoes, just because she's not talking doesn't mean she's not thinking about you. I've seen the way she looked you, and honestly if she has friends that are willing to walk into the lion's den for her, then there has to still be something there; or else she'd be the one fighting that battle not them." Caleb said, pulling up in front of Jordan's house and shifting his car into park.

"I hope you're right" Jordan said, checking his phone again only to be met with an empty screen. "But every day that goes by I lose a little hope."

"That's why I wanted you to hear this" Caleb said "If she's anything like me, she needs to figure out whether or not she can live without you. Judging by their songs, I think she's too afraid to do that. That's why it's taking so long. You guys have had it easy so far because you've always been on opposite ends of the world, but for the next three months you're going to come face to face with each other; and all this running she's doing is gonna have to stop."

"What do I do if she's not ready to stop running?" he asked, afraid of what the answer was going to be.

"Well," he breathed, "If you're really sure that you can't live without her, then you're just going to have to wait until she is" seeing the pained expression on Jordan's face, he reached over and patted him on the shoulder "I know that's not what you want to hear, but it's the facts man. Unfortunately you're the one messed up, so now you've got to wait for her, you just can't force her into something that she's not ready for."

"I should have you pick me up more often" Jordan laughed "Shane's not real good with the love advice"

"Anytime man" Caleb smiled as Jordan opened the door, "Hey Jordan" he called, and Jordan ducked is head in through the open window "if it's any consolation, I really do think it's going to work out between you two" Jordan smiled a thanks and headed into his house.

6 years ago…

"Ange, baby…you have to wake up" Jordan nudged Angela before returning to the task of getting ready for work. Patty and Gram had gone out of town for the weekend, so Angela took advantage of the situation by spending both nights at Jordan's. They had spent all day Saturday in bed, but it was Sunday morning and Jordan was running late for work. Kneeling beside the bed he kissed her forehead and brushed her hair behind her ear. "Baby…"he whispered.

"Mmmm" she breathed in deep and finally opened her eyes. Seeing a fully dressed Jordan perched on the edge of the bed beside her she frowned and sat up. "Why are you dressed? Stay here with me for just a little bit longer" she purred, wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her head on his shoulder. She kissed the space on his neck, right below his jaw line and then worked her way towards his mouth. She pulled him backwards onto the bed and began unbuttoning his work shirt. He hovered over her, resting most of his weight on his elbows. Moaning into her mouth as she got to the bottom button and began toying with the top of his jeans; she smiled at the effect she was having on him.

Jordan laughed at how far they had come. It seemed like only yesterday she was making excuses not to sleep with him, and now it was like she couldn't get enough. Not that he was complaining, it was a welcome change for him, but it was still so exciting for him every time she acted so bold. At the beginning whenever she would initiate sex with him, she would get this blush on her cheeks, like she was embarrassed for wanting to be with him. It was his favorite part.

"Babe, I have to get to work" he said attempting to separate himself from her embrace "Besides, you have to get home before your parents get back. If they think you spent the weekend here they'll never let you out with me again" he kissed her one more time, then stood up and redressed himself, across the room and away from Angela.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah…" she pouted, getting out from under the covers and getting up on her knees. She slipped on one of his t-shirts that was at the foot of the bed just as Jordan turned and faced her, a moan escaped his lips.

"Do you know how sexy you are when you wear my clothes" he growled, crossing the room to get to her, placing his hands on both sides of her face and licking his lips.

"Want to show me how sexy?" she giggled, hooking her fingers through his belt loops and pulling him flush against her. "My parents aren't going to be home for a few more hours," she whispered, nibbling on his earlobe "and you know your boss won't mind you being a little bit late" she rubbed her hands up his stomach, resting on his chest and then moving them up to his hair. He loved it when she played with his hair.

"I can never say no to you" he sighed, kissing her neck and slipping his hands under her shirt. Stopping just before he reached her breasts "Angela?" he said sounding nervous and shy.

"Yeah baby" she moaned against his touch, running her hands down his back.

"I love you" he said stopping what he was doing to look her in the eye. They had never officially said that to each other although it was implied. It was the first time he'd ever said that to anyone, and he was sure the pounding of his heart was going to rattle the windows.

He knew he had to say it, he'd tried many times before but he just couldn't get the words to come out. He kept telling himself that he was just waiting for the perfect moment, but in the back of his mind he knew that he was just afraid that she wouldn't say it back. But right then, in that moment he knew that he loved her, beyond a shadow of a doubt; and if he couldn't say it then, when would he?

Angela smiled, small at first and then it took up her whole face. "I love you too" and then she attacked his lips.


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks again for the reviews, I'm glad to know that people are still there I've been pretty busy with work and school, but I'm still keeping up with the writing (mostly because this story seems to stick in my head so I'm constantly thinking about where I want it to go next). I hope that the developments in this chapter work out for you guys, and trust me; Angela and Jordan will eventually see each other…hopefully very soon. Thanks again to creceant, 3girlsmom, and Gagirl29 for the reviews on the last chapter. **

**Chapter 7.**

_I was never good at hide and go seek when I was little; I either hid in the most obvious places, or I would make a noise and give away my location. My mom always said it was because I was too sweet to be good at a game that revolved around deceiving people…I just think it was because I hated being alone…_

7 years ago…

"Mom that's so not fair" I yelled, stomping up the stairs after her "It's not like I'm asking for permission to run away with him or something. God!" I huffed, stopping in the doorway to her bedroom. "It's just like a movie"

"And if it's just a movie, then there's no reason for you to be embarrassed" my mom replied pushing past me and going into Danielle's room to drop off the laundry. "I'm not asking for a blood sample, I just want to meet the boy that is going to be driving my daughter to the movie"

"But it's so embarrassing!" I whined, "It's just like, so intrusive into my life" I sighed trying to gain composer so I'd seem more grown up.

"Angela," my mother said in a warning tone "I just want to meet him, so that if god forbid something were to happen, I'd be able to pick him out of a line up if I had too"

"Mother!" I sighed "You are completely insane" I stormed off towards my room, turning just before slamming my door "I hope you're proud of yourself, because you're completely ruining my life!" and with that I slammed my door.

"Does she really think I'm proud of this" Patty laughed, resting her head against Gramm's chest. "I never in a million years thought this would happen, but I've officially turned into my mother"

"Not completely" Gramm chuckled, rubbing Patty's back for comfort. "Maybe just this once though, you can try and see it through her eyes"

"What's that supposed to mean" Patty said, pushing away from Gramm and looking him in the eyes warningly.

"Hey, I'm on your side" he protested, holding his hands up in mock surrender, "But, it is just one movie, and we might be able to use this as a bargaining chip for other things."

Sighing, Patty closed her eyes and rubbed her face. "Fine." She conceded "but I want her home by 11, and the next time he picks her up for anything, I want to meet him"

"Sounds fair enough to me" Gramm agreed.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I squealed, running out from my room and hugging both of my parents.

"We're serious young lady" my mom warned "This isn't going to fly any more, we either meet him or you can forget about ever going anywhere else with him again"

"Deal" I smiled.

I continued to see Jordan for 2 months before he ever met either of my parents.

Present day…

I hated baggage claim. It never seemed to fail that my bag was either the last one to come out, or it'd be stuck under someone else's and I'd have to wrestle it out of the pile. Finally spotting my small suitcase, I pushed my way forward and reached for it just to be cut off by someone else grabbing it first. I was about to yell at him but then he turned around and I jumped into his arms. "Daddy!" I smiled.

"Well hello to you too" He laughed, putting the suitcase on the ground and hugging me tight. I don't care how old you get; when you're hugged by your dad you always turn into a little girl.

"Where's mom?" I asked, following him out of the crowd and towards the exit.

"She's circling the lot, its crazy packed out there and we didn't want to have to fight for a spot." He said, stopping at the curb and looking for their car.

I sighed contently, putting my hands in my hoodie's pocket and tilting my head up at my dad. "It's good to be home" I mused silently.

"I'm glad you came home for a little bit" he smiled, placing an arm around my shoulder and pulling me into his side. "I hope you're hungry, you're mom's been convinced that you're not eating so she's had me make practically one of everything in the world for you to take back with you on Thursday. I swear our house looks like a buffet restaurant right now" he laughed.

I smiled for him, but my heart dropped a little at the mention of having to leave the security of my parent's house so soon. It was already midafternoon on Tuesday, and I had a flight to catch in a little over 48 hours in order to be back in LA in time for sound check. After leaving Alex on Monday, I wandered around for a while before I realized that I didn't know many people in LA, and I wasn't sure of where to go. Oddly enough, I found my way to Jordan's house around 2:00, but I was too scared to knock on the door. I sat on the curb across the street for about an hour before I finally left and made my way back to the hotel we were staying at. I'm not sure what I would have said to him if I'd actually built up the courage to knock, but I just desperately wanted to see him. My mind had played through many scenarios, most of them good; some of them not. Ultimately, it was the scenario that another girl could have answered the door that sent me away in the end. I wasn't sure my heart could take it.

"There's your mom" my dad's voice broke me out of my day dreams, bringing me back to reality.

"Angela, sweetheart" my mom started crying the second she got out of the car. She hugged me so tight I swear she was trying to burst my lungs.

"Hey mom" I smiled, feeling my eyes already starting to mist. "Thanks for letting me come home for a little bit" I whispered.

"Oh baby!" she sighed, cupping my face in her hands "You don't ever even have to ask!"

"Alright you two" my dad teased after putting my bag in the car, "Let's get a move on, people are starting to stare" she said, ushering me and my mom to the car.

Later that night, after catching up with my sister who had moved into an apartment with her boyfriend across town, and eating more food than I had in the last month; I sat on the couch curled up under blankets next to my mom. We talked about the tour, and I showed her pictures of all the places we'd been. I felt more relaxed then I had in a long time, and I realized that coming home was exactly what I needed to clear my head. I could tell my mom wanted to talk about Jordan, but she was just dancing around the topic in case I wasn't ready. Figuring I should just bite the bullet and get it over with, I decided to bring it up first.

"So, I don't know if you know much about this summer tour we're doing" I said, starting the conversation.

"Not much really" she said, placing her hot chocolate on the coffee table and pulling her legs up on to the couch, "I mean, I know that it's a charity tour, and there's going to be a ton of bands with you guys."

"Yeah. It's going to be great, but that's kind of the problem" I sighed. "Jordan's band is going to be there too" I looked up at her and she nodded in understanding. "It's weird you know, cause I haven't spoken to him in a year, and now all of the sudden, he's everywhere I turn. I'm really scared that I'm going to see him again, and it's all gonna come back to me."

"What's going to come back" she asked cautiously.

"My feelings," I admitted "It was the hardest thing I've ever done stopping communication with him, but I knew that it was what I needed to do if I had any chance at all of moving on. But lately, it's like my mind can't think of anything but him, and I'm so scared that I'm going to get my heart broke again." I was crying now and attempting to hide my face behind my hands. My mom leaned forward, taking my hands in hers, and lowering them to her lap.

"It's ok to be scared sweetheart" my mom spoke softly, "we're all scared sometimes." Wiping a tear from my cheek she continued on, "Jordan, well; what he did was something that there is absolutely no excuse for; but I know that he loves you, more than anyone other than your dad and me. I've seen the two of you overcome some pretty big obstacles, but at the end of the day, you both have to be willing to fight for each other or you'll never make it. It's not enough just to love your other half; I wish it were that easy, but you are either going to get past this or you're not."

"I don't want to think about the rest of my life without him" I whispered "but I just don't know where to go from here."

"Tell him that." My mom replied as if it were the simplest idea in the world.

"What if…" I started only to be cut off by my mom.

"No," she said firmly "you can't live your life in that frame of mind. Tell. Him." She stressed each word "and if he doesn't respond the way you want him to, then fine. I know it's hard, but it's time you two dealt with the hands you were given."

After heading to bed that night I lay awake and thought about what my mom had said to me. Could it really be that simple? If all I had to do was tell Jordan that I missed him and that I loved him, then what was stopping me? Why did it feel like I didn't know how to speak when I thought about it? My world had been crumbling around my feet for the last year, and I knew it was because I was trying to do something so unnatural. Sitting up in bed, I turned on my lamp and grabbed a scrap paper and pen and the words started pouring out of me. Why I hadn't thought about this before, I couldn't tell Jordan exactly what I was thinking, but I could write it down. After about an hour of messing around with the placing of the words and the chords I started laughing. This could totally work.

Pulling my cell phone out of the bottom of my bag so I could text Rayanne and Rickie to let them know I wanted to add a song to our set list, I noticed I had a missed text message. Opening it, my breath caught in my throat. He wanted to see me. I started to text him back, but I knew that it should be more. I needed to talk to him. Deleting the message, I dialed the once familiar number and held my breath as it rang. I was getting more and more nervous with each ring, thinking that I should have just texted, I was just about to hang up when the line picked up and I heard him fumbling with the phone and then clear his throat. "Hello?" he grunted.

"Hey" I wished it would have come out stronger, but the word felt silly coming out of my mouth and I suddenly felt a little embarrassed.

"Angela?" he breathed. I could hear relief in his voice, like he'd been waiting for this call. At least that's what I was going to tell myself.

"Sorry it's so late" I breathed, "I uh…I just checked my phone and I saw that I had missed you earlier, and I just wanted…I don't know what I was thinking, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called so late…" I rambled, suddenly so aware of exactly what time it was.

"NO!" He exclaimed, "No, I mean, I'm glad you called. I was starting to think you weren't going to" he said with a hint of sadness.

"I'm sorry" I don't know why I was apologizing so much, but I felt like I had a year's worth of making up to do. "I uh, I'm not in LA right now, I came home to see my parents for a few days. It's been years since I've seen them without using Skype, so I just wanted to do this before this next tour started off" I explained even though he hadn't asked.

"Oh," he sounded disappointed, "When do you get back?"

"Thursday, pretty late" I cringed at the timing of everything "I should make it back just in time for sound check, that is if nothing gets delayed." I felt stuck now, unsure of what to say next. I'm so stupid, I should have just texted him and then I wouldn't sound like such an idiot. "When is your fist set?"

"Friday morning, and then we're hosting one of the interview tents for MTV until 1:00. Are you free in the afternoon?" he asked, rustling through papers I could only assume were his schedule of events.

"I think we have an acoustic set at a radio station until about 4. What are you doing after that?" I asked, suddenly feeling like running into him was going to be the least of my troubles.

"Meet and greet until 8" he huffed "this can't be happening" he chuckled, and I giggled slightly.

"Maybe we're gonna have to Skype from our buses" I joked as a sick feeling washed over me.

"This has to be a nightmare" he groaned, "we're the closest we've been to each other in years, and yet we couldn't be farther apart"

"We have to bump into each other sooner or later" I said, but beginning to see the hopelessness in the situation.

"Those are the worst words I've ever heard in my life" he sighed "this can't be possible" he repeated "can you come back early?"

"I don't think so" I replied "but I can try. It was miracle I found the tickets I did in the first place."

"I miss you" he sniffed, and my heart broke at the idea that he was crying. I wanted to make it better for him, but I wasn't sure what to do.

"I miss you too…" I admitted, yawning as I lay back down and turned off the light.

"Do you think that you could stay on the phone for a little bit longer" he pleaded quietly "I just want to feel like you're here"

"Yeah" I agreed, closing my eyes and being coaxed into sleep by the sound of his breathing.


	8. Chapter 8

**So this chapter is a little bit short, but it is mostly just a filler until the next chapter. I'm going to be working on this story all weekend, so hopefully I'll have the next one up Sunday or Monday. Thanks again for all the reviews, you guys are amazing! **

**Chapter 8.**

_Sometimes it only takes one small thing to make you believe that anything is possible…that hope is on the horizon. Hope. It's such a small word, but it can like, move mountains…or something. I think I heard that before. All I had to do was hang on for a few more hours…here's to hoping…._

Present day…

"Dude, sit down" Shane said, throwing an empty water bottle at Jordan "you're pacing is making me dizzy."

It was Thursday afternoon and according to Rayanne, Angela was due back in an hour. It would leave them exactly 6 minutes to talk before she had to be at her sound check and he had to be across the fairgrounds for an interview. 6 minutes. He wasn't sure if there would ever be enough time to say what he needed to say to her, but considering he hadn't seen her other than in the YouTube videos he secretly watched for the last year, he was ready to just be in her presence; even if it was only 6 minutes.

"Are you sure I look ok?" Jordan asked, stopping to look in the mirror again.

"I'm not doing this with you man," Shane groaned "why don't you go find Graff or Rickie, they'd help you with this more than I ever could" Shane laughed looking down at his own appearance, he was far from a style icon.

"I don't want to seem like a total loser" Jordan replied, pulling off his shirt and changing into a different one for the 15th time. "Well?" he questioned, holding out his arms and motioning for Shane to comment.

"Oh gee whiz Jordan" Shane mocked in a fake high pitched voice, "You sure look keen in that shirt." He batted his eye lashes and smiling sweetly. "Come one man," he said, straightening up "I don't know if that shirt is good or not"

"You're right" Jordan sighed, "This is ridiculous" he laughed "I'm actually shaking." Jordan sat down and buried his face in his hands.

"Come on," Shane moaned, "It's just Angela…stop freaking out"

"Just Angela?" Jordan questioned, looking at Shane like he had three heads "It's never been "just Angela". I haven't seen her for two years man" he sighed "I just want to make sure that everything is perfect"

"You can't be sure that everything will be perfect" Shane pointed out "So what if you show up in a red shirt and she was wishing you'd be wearing blue-"

"Do you think I should put the blue one back on?" Jordan interrupted, pulling off his shirt again and searching for the blue one he'd discarded minutes before.

"Not the point" Shane rolled his eyes "All I'm saying is, you guys are already heading in the right direction, and a few little mishaps aren't going to ruin everything"

"So I should wear the red shirt" Jordan questioned, looking lost among all the clothes he had surrounding him.

"Dude, what are you doing?" Shane questioned lightly, "You've traveled around the world, you've had your face on the cover of countless magazines, and you're the star in millions of girl's dreams. You're Jordan Fucking Catalano. Take a breath, you're going to be fine" he said, trying to calm his friend's nerves.

Jordan laughed at his friends list. He wasn't worried about being with Angela; the thought of being with her again actually calmed him down. It was the fear that he could mess everything up if he wasn't careful. He always felt like the world was against him; that no matter how hard he tried something would always go wrong. He knew that he and Angela didn't have many more lives left; because if something as big as this happened again it would completely destroy them both.

The door to their bus opened, and Rayanne and Rickie walked in cautiously. Jordan smiled up at them in a greeting.

"Hey doll" Shane flirted, scooting over so there was room next to him on the bench seat "how about you come sit over here with me" he patted the seat next to him and put his arm across the back of the seat.

"You heard him doll" Rayanne said pushing Rickie towards Shane's waiting seat "why don't you go sit next to him" she teased. Shane smirked at Rayanne, sliding over a little more and letting Rickie sit down.

"Someday Graff…"

"Not even in your dreams Shane" Rayanne smiled, sitting on the opposite side of the bus next to Jordan. "So, we kind of have a little problem" she started, looking at Jordan as she spoke. His face fell as she continued on "We really need to get to work as soon as Angela makes it in. We're doing a new song tonight, and it's going to be tight as it is" she said looking towards Rickie for support.

"I just can't catch a break." Jordan sighed, standing up and taking off his button up shirt and slipping a ratty t-shirt.

"Well, see" Rickie interrupted "We were thinking we could help you out with that, but it's gonna involve changing some stuff around"

"Anything" Jordan said.

"Good" Rayanne smiled excitedly. "This involves you too Shaney" she said wiggling her eyebrows.

"Wait a minute…." Shane started a little nervous about what was about to happen "Who said I wanted anything to do with this?"

"Shane" Jordan pleaded "please?"

Sighing deeply he gave in "Fine, but you owe me one" he pointed at Jordan.

3 years ago…

_I hate having to pose for pictures, I always feel like such a tool._

Jordan smiled and posed, then turned a little to the left and did the same thing. Smile, repeat, smile, repeat, smile, repeat. He never understood how so many people wanted a picture of him or what they did with those pictures once they had them. The idea that people had these pictures of him walking down the street or leaving a restaurant was weird. Today he was waiting outside of the studio for Shane to finish up a last minute fix for the label and was spotted sitting against a tree reading a book.

"What are you up too?" asked one of the camera holders.

"Just hanging out" Jordan replied, uninterested in having a conversation with this guy.

"Waiting for someone?" another one asked.

"Looks like it" he sighed, pulling out his phone and texting Shane asking him to hurry up.

"You dating anyone?" the first guy pressed.

Jordan chuckled. He'd always done a good job of keeping his relationship with Angela out of the public eye. It was amazing to him how many celebrities were "caught" dating in secret. He'd been with the same girl since high school, and yet very few people actually knew about it.

"You guys know I don't talk about my personal life" he answered.

"I guess that's a yes" one of the camera guys said to the other ones.

Shane came out of the studio just then, and signaled for Jordan follow him.

"Well," he said, attempting to be nice "got to go. You guys take care ok" he hurried across the lot to the car Shane was waiting in and hopped in the passenger seat.

"Make some new friends" Shane joked.

"I don't get what's so interesting about snapping a picture of me reading a book" Jordan sighed, "It's not even like I'm reading something that interesting" he said, looking down at his warn book.

"Guess it's just a slow news day" Shane said, pulling out of the lot and heading to their house. "Man, I am so ready to head out on this next tour. I'm starting to go a little stir crazy"

"I know what you mean" Jordan replied, "Is it sad that I feel more at home on the road then I do when we're actually home?"

"Nah" Shane shrugged, "You and me are just a couple of ol' road dogs" he joked with a southern drawl.

Jordan laughed at his friends attempt at an accent and pulled out his phone, looking at the picture of Angela and him on his wallpaper. "I'm thinking about catching a flight out to New York tonight" he said calmly "Maybe spend a few days with Angela before we head out, want to tag along?"

"Sure" he shrugged, "as long as you don't make me spend any time with Graff"

"Could you two at least try and pretend to get along" Jordan sighed "I mean, I'm not asking you to like braid each other's hair, but at least not fight anytime you're in a room together.

"It's not me man, it's her" Shane protested "If she wasn't always being such a bitch maybe I'd actually be able to look are her without wanting to vomit"

"See" Jordan huffed "That's kind of what I'm talking about. There's a reason she's mean to you and that's it right there"

"She doesn't even care, I promise" Shane pouted.

"Whatever man, just for this weekend, try not to be so" he stopped short when a familiar voice filled the air. Turning up the radio he smiled brightly "Dude! It's Rayanne!" turning it up so that it was blaring out of the speakers he pulled out his phone and dialed Angela.

"Hello?" she answered

"Babe, do you hear this?" Jordan beamed "You're on the radio!" he exclaimed proudly.

"Oh my god!" Angela shrieked, yelling for Rayanne and Rickie. "Guys, we're on the radio in LA" she was laughing and he could hear Rickie and Rayanne just as excited.

"I'm so proud of you" Jordan exclaimed.

"This is amazing" Angela smiled, "I'm so happy right now! I can't believe you got to hear us on the radio before we did"

Jordan laughed a little at the sound of disappointment in her voice. "This is where it all starts Miss Chase; pretty soon people are going to be following you around and taking your picture while you're reading outside."

"That's so weird, who would do that?" she laughed, assuming Jordan was just making stuff up.

"You'd be surprised" he answered. "So what do you think about me and Shane flying to New York tonight to spend a few days together before we have to head out?"

"I'd love for you guys to come!" Angela beamed, "I think Rickie is staying at Alex's this weekend, so I'll see if he'd mind if Shane camped out in his room" Jordan could hear Rayanne in the background but couldn't make out her words.

"What is she saying" he asked with a smile, knowing what she was probably saying.

"She's just expressing how excited she is to get to spend a few days with Shane, that's all" Angela sarcastically said.

"Take it back" Rayanne yelled, grabbing the phone and correcting Angela "I said that I'd rather chew broken glass then-" there was a rustle and Jordan could hear Angela and Rayanne fighting over the phone. Eventually Angela won and came back on the line "Sorry, she said couldn't be more excited. I've got to go, text me the details and I'll meet you at the airport" they said their goodbyes and Jordan laughed while putting his phone back in his pockets.

"What's so funny?" Shane questioned, looking over at Jordan.

"I guess Rayanne's excited to spend some time with you too" Jordan chuckled.


	9. Chapter 9

**Here's the next chapter as promised…I hope you guys like it **

_Have you ever noticed that time seems to move backwards the closer you get to something you really want. Sitting on the runway waiting to get off the plane felt like hours. I kept checking my watch, but I was sure that someone was playing a trick on me and had taken the batteries out or something…_

"Come on" I moaned, looking out the window from my seat on the plane. I was excited when the flight attendant told me that we were scheduled to land almost 25 minutes early. I really wanted the chance to actually talk to Jordan before I had to be whisked away to the stage, but now as we sat taxiing on the runway I began to watch those precious minutes slip away.

"Miss Chase" the flight attendant spoke softly, leaning in as I looked away from the window for the first time in nearly half an hour. "I just wanted to let you know that we will be pulling into the gate in the next minute, and we wanted to give you the opportunity to unboard first." She said, motioning for me to follow her to the seats up by the door.

"Thank you" I smiled, following her and sitting on the edge of the seat. I had all my stuff in my hands, barely able to contain my excitement.

"You look anxious" the attendant smiled at me as she was going through her end of flight check.

"I'm just excited to get to the fairgrounds" I blushed knowing that my excitement had nothing to do with that. I pulled out my phone and was disappointed to see that I hadn't heard from Jordan yet. I had texted him before the plane left telling him I couldn't wait to get back to see him, even if it was just a few minutes. We'd been talking nonstop since our conversation on Wednesday morning, and for the first time in a year I felt hopeful.

"Well, good luck" she said, opening the door. Taking a deep breath I sprung from my seat and thanked her on the way out. I dialed both Rickie and Alex but got no answer. Maneuvering around the crowds of people in the hallway, I hurried to baggage claim and smiled when fate seemed to be on my side as my bag was the first one on the belt. I picked it up and called Rayanne.

"Go for Rayanne" she chirped into the phone.

"Finally" I exclaimed, "I was beginning to think I was in some sort of twilight zone"

"Oh Angel-food, always one for the dramatics" Rayanne joked, "besides, everyone has been busy trying to get your present in order"

"My what?" I asked, repositioning my bag on my shoulder. "Why did you guys get me a present, my birthday's not for another 4 months" seeing the doors just ahead of me picked up my pace "who's here to pick me up?"

"We felt bad for lying to you for the last couple weeks" Rayanne replied "So we all put our heads together and decided to get you something, as a way to say sorry or whatever"

"I already told you guys I understand and I'm not mad anymore, besides if that hadn't happened we wouldn't have gotten that song out of the deal. You didn't have to get me anything" walking out the door I looked around for either Rickie or Alex but I didn't see them anywhere.

"Well, never the less," Rayanne continued on "I knew that tonight was special for you, so I arranged a little something for ya"

"That's great Rayne" I sighed, "but right now, I just want to find Rickie or Alex so I can finally see Jordan before the show"

"About that…" she started. And then I heard it.

"Angela!" turning around I saw him. Even after all this time, the sight of him leaning against the car took my breath away.

"I take it back" I laughed into the phone "This is the greatest present ever, Thanks Rayne"

I'm not sure if Rayanne said anything after that, I hung the phone up and rushed towards Jordan, who was waiting for me with a giant smile on his face. When I finally reached him, I flung my bag on the ground and wrapped my arms securely around his neck. He picked me up slightly and took a deep breath.

"You still smell the same" I heard him whisper in my ear, burring his face even farther into my neck. Placing me back on the ground he began to loosen his grip, but I pulled him even closer.

"I'm not ready yet" I giggled "Just a little bit longer please" I begged, needing the feel of his arms around me more than I'd thought possible. I felt him smile against my neck and his arms tighten around my waist again. I was pretty sure I could stay frozen in that moment forever.

"I hate to do this," Jordan said, kissing my cheek and pulling away a little so he could look me in the eye "but we really do need to get you back for your show" he tucked my hair behind my ears, and looked confused when my eyes started watering. "What's with the tears?" he said soothingly.

"I was just afraid that we'd never get back here" I smiled, "I've just missed you so much"

Jordan opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by the sound of his phone ringing. Pulling it out of his pocket he answered it, picking up my bag and throwing it in the back seat. "Hello" he said, opening the passenger door for me. Once he I was settled in he rushed around the front and got in. "Calm down, we're on our way" he said smiling as he pulled away from the curb and headed towards the exit. "Shane I know, ok-I owe you massively for this" he looked over at me briefly, smiling before returning to his conversation. I sighed and looked out the window, resting my head against the glass. I couldn't believe how easily it was to fall back into step with Jordan, but then again we did always have our own rhythm. We just moved well together.

Closing my eyes, I let myself be soothed by the sound of his voice. His smell was clouding the air in the car, and I could feel his hand rest on my leg every time we came to a stop light. He was taking over every one of my senses, and for the first time in a long time I was glad to lose control. I'm not sure when he got off the phone, but after a while I could hear him humming that same melody that I heard about a year ago. I opened my eyes and watched him while he sang. It was still just as beautiful as I remembered; but I couldn't place it in my mind. Placing my hand over the one he had lazily draped on my knee, I turned a little so that I was facing him "What song is that?" I asked softly.

"Just something I've been messing around with" he said, pulling my hand up to his lips and kissing it before returning both our hands back to their previous place.

"It's beautiful" I said, lacing our fingers together.

"Did you have a good time with your parents?" he asked.

"It was nice" I answered, "I spent some time with Danielle and then I ran into Sharon at the grocery store. Did you know that her and Brian Krakow got married?"

"The cheerleader and the brain huh?" he laughed, "Who would of thought?"

"You're one to talk" I pointed out.

"What do you mean?" he asked pulling in the fairgrounds.

"Oh come on," I laughed "I was such a nerd, and you were…you" I said, unable to come up with a word that suited him perfectly.

Parking the car, Jordan cut the engine and turned in his seat to look at me. "That was always your problem" he sighed, tucking my hair behind my ear "You never understood just how amazing you were" he licked his lips and cradled my face in his hand. "You were like, leagues ahead of me"

"That was always your problem" I half whispered, moving my hand to the back of his neck and leaning closer "You never understood just how amazing **you** were" I smiled, repeating the words he'd just said to me.

_The moment just before you get kissed is probably the most intense and intimate experience that you'll ever share with someone. Your breathing sort of falls in sync with the other person, and your eyes just lock on to each other. Your heart races, so hard sometimes that you swear it's going to just beat right out of your chest. The build up to the actual kiss is just as magical as the kiss itself. _

"Angela…" Jordan started, leaning in a little closer

"Yeah" I whispered, my eyes fluttering shut as I tangled my fingers in the back of his hair. It had been so long since I was this close with Jordan, this close with anyone really, and I was incredibly nervous. What if it was different now? What if…I…was different now? I could feel his breath on me, and my head got all light and was sure I would faint any minute. How could I be so…

There was a tapping at the window behind me, and I could hear Jordan moan as he dropped his hand from my face and looked over my shoulder. When I opened my eyes I saw the largest smile on his face and he nodded for me to follow his gaze. Turning slightly to see what he was looking at, I burst out in laughter. Jordan started laughing too before kissing my forehead and getting out of the car. I got out and leaned against the car, still laughing slightly.

"Nice legs Shane" I joked as Jordan came and rested against the car next to me.

"Shaney, I didn't know you had this side to you" Jordan laughed, "You're not so bad looking for a girl"

"Not funny" Shane pouted, pointing his finger at Jordan "You owe me big time for this" he said, pointing at the dress he was wearing.

"Come on man, it's not so bad" Jordan soothed, "Red really is your color" I erupted in giggles, burying my face in Jordan's shoulder.

"Don't think I don't blame you too, Ange" Shane said turning on me.

"Me?" I questioned, standing up straight as Rayanne and Rickie appeared behind him. "What do I have to do with this?"

"It was your stupid idea to have a guy in drag on the cover of your new album, and since you weren't here to help them find someone, I had to fill in so you and lover boy could spend some time together" he huffed. I looked questioning at Rayanne and Rickie, both of whom where silently laughing in the background.

"Shane, I appreciate you helping out, but" I stumbled, "I have no idea what you're talking about…we've had our album cover done for weeks, and it didn't have anything to do with you…in a dress…" I winced as Rayanne and Rickie both let out a joined giggle, and Shane's eyes grew wide.

"Graff…" he roared, turning to face her.

"Sorry Shaney," Rayanne batted her lashes, moving past him and grabbing my hand, pulling me away from them. "How many opportunities are going to present themselves for me to get you in a dress?" she giggled, running off towards our bus with me and Rickie in tow.

"I'm gonna get her back for this" Shane warned, looking back at Jordan who was still in awe.

"Aw, don't feel so bad Shane" he joked, opening the door for Shane to get in the car, "At least now she'll have to be the one trying to get you out of a dress" he blew a kiss at Shane and walked around to the driver's seat, getting in and driving off towards their bus on the opposite side of the camp.

7 years ago…

_I'd spent almost my entire life wondering what my first kiss was going to be like, who it was going to be with or how it was going to happen. Would I be good at it? Would he be good at it? I'd been so obsessed with this monumental event in my life, that I was actually completely blindsided when it happened… _

"So like he wanted to go home right?" Jordan questioned, looking up from the book he had in his lap.

"Exactly" I smiled. I'd been helping him with our English assignments for the last two weeks. He was actually very good at the understanding the material, it just took him longer to read it. When I'd offered to help him, it was more just so that I could be with him; but he needed the help so he agreed. We'd sit in the back seat of his car down the street from the school, and I'd read the chapters out loud and then we'd fill out the worksheets together.

I couldn't believe that I was actually spending time with Jordan Catalano. We'd talked randomly at school before, mostly just him asking to barrow a pen, or my desperate attempts at small talk; but here we were, actually like…making plans to spend time together. I was sure he didn't even know I existed on that level, but at least for an hour each night I could be in his presence with no one else around.

Tonight we were going over the Odyssey, which I barely understood myself, but I'd never dream of telling him that. I sat cross legged in the back seat and he was slouched next to me, and every once in a while he'd like, shift positions and his leg would brush up against my knee for like seconds at a time. I was sure that my heart stopped each time. Pulling my hands into my sleeves, I tucked them under my legs and continued reading.

"Are you cold," he asked, looking up from the book that he was following along with.

"A little" I admitted, a little embarrassed.

Sitting up straight, he reached into the front seat and pulled back his corduroy coat. Awkwardly, he placed it around my shoulders and then returned to his side of the seat. "Better?" he asked, chewing on the side of his thumb. I nodded, smiling a little and turning my head to take in the smell of his coat.

"So uh," he cleared his throat, looking back to the book in his hands, "There's like this movie that Tino was telling me about, it like just came out or whatever" he stopped, playing with the corner of the book and then looking up at me.

"What movie?" I asked, wondering why he was telling me this.

"I don't know" he shrugged, "It's got that one guy in it, ya know?" I nodded, even though I was even more confused than I was a second ago. "Well, I mean…I was thinking about going to see it…on like Friday or something" he mumbled, looking back to his book and shifting again. This time when he leg brushed against my knee he didn't move it away.

"Ok" I said, looking directly at the spot that our legs were touching.

He shifted again, sitting up straight and breaking contact with my knee. "You maybe wanna like…you know…go…with me?" he asked. I smiled, because he was asking me out on like, an actual date; and he actually seemed scared that I would say no.

"Sure" I grinned, and he smiled like he didn't actually believe I was going to say yes. He leaned his upper body towards me, brushing some hair from my face, before kissing me softly on the lips. My breath caught in my throat, and my whole body stiffened. Jordan pulled away, looking at my face, like he was waiting for permission to continue. I closed my eyes and leaned back into him, allowing myself to be wrapped up in him.


	10. Chapter 10

This is the last chapter before the story shifts into a different direction, and I think you guys are going to like where I'm headed next. This chapter features two songs, one is **Fool That I Am** (originally by Etta James, but I absolutely adore the Adele version) and **All of Me** by Angus and Julia Stone. Thanks again to **Gagirl29** and **3girlsmom **for your faithful reading! I hope more than anyone, you two enjoy this chapter…

**Chapter 10.**

_There used to be all these moments that would leave me completely speechless…9 times out of 10 they involved Angela…who am I kidding, they always involved Angela…_

"How many times are you going to do that" Jordan laughed, watching Shane pull darts out of a picture of Rayanne he'd hung up in the bus.

"Till I'm not mad anymore" Shane huffed, walking back and throwing another dart.

"Now don't get your panties in a bunch" Jordan poked, "So she got you in a dress, it was bound to happen sooner or later"

"Later would have been much better for me" Shane pouted.

Jordan laughed, and settled back into his chair on the bus. "So what do you want to do tonight?" he questioned, stretching and reaching for a bottle of water.

"Well, I was planning on sneaking onto Rayanne's bus and leaving a little surprise for her" Shane said, "I'm kidding" he said, picking up on Jordan's warning glance. "I don't know, I figured you'd be watching Angela's set tonight, so I thought I'd just hang in and watch a movie or something"

"Angela doesn't really like it when I watch her perform" Jordan said casually "She says it freaks her out to know I'm in the audience"

"Aren't you just a little curious about this new song that's got them all worked up?" Shane asked, finally abandoning his little game of darts and throwing himself down on the bench across from Jordan.

"Yeah," he said, chewing on his thumb "But what do you want me to do about it?"

"Dude, sometimes I wonder how you get dressed in the morning without my help" Shane teased, standing up and pulling Jordan out of the bus with him, "We're at an outdoor festival" he said motioning to the space around them, "We'll just go and hang out in the back, she'll never even know we're there" he said, starting to walk in the direction of the stage.

"I don't know" Jordan said hesitantly following him. "I don't want her to get mad, I mean, I've only got her talking to me for the last couple days, isn't it a little soon for me to mess things up already?"

"It's not like she specifically told you not to go," Shane said, "besides, if it ever comes up, just blame it on me"

"And tell her what?" Jordan laughed "You've never really been a huge fan; she'll never believe that you just wanted to catch her set."

"You make everything so complicated" he argued "Their bus is parked over there, if it ever comes up that you heard their set, all you have to say is that you had followed me over there to stop me from messing with Rayanne's stuff and happened to hear a few songs"

"I guess that makes sense" Jordan agreed, picking up his pace a little to catch up with Shane, "You're not really gonna mess with their bus though right?"

"Do I look stupid?" Shane chuckled "Besides, I need time to come up with the perfect come back for Rayanne. I don't think squirting toothpaste on her pillow will really make up for me spending the day in a dress."

"This thing with you two is kind of weird" Jordan admitted as they walked side by side "I mean, I get why you like her, she's a challenge for you, and you never back down from a challenge...but I don't understand her fascination with you"

"Gee, thanks man" Shane said, punching him in the shoulder "I don't like her, I just…whatever and she definitely could do a lot worse than a guy like me"

"Could you imagine you guys like…dating?" Jordan shuddered, "Sorry, this is just too weird for me to even think about"

"Dude!" Shane stopped, and threw his hands up "Why are you acting like I'm some kind of freak?"

"Shane that's not what I mean" Jordan said suddenly realizing the way that just came out "I mean you're like the only family I've ever really had. You're like my brother you know?" they continued walking while Jordan attempted to explain it to Shane "And Rayanne, well…When I started dating Angela I had to understand that Rickie and Rayanne came along with her, like a packaged deal or something" he said, suddenly understanding for the first time just how interconnected their lives had become over the years. "They became like, really close to me too. So all I'm saying is that it would be weird if you guys dated, just because of what you mean to me, not because you guys can't date."

"Thanks I guess," Shane said, looking at the ground "Not that like, it's even an issue you know. Cause like, I don't even like…like her you know." Shane shook his head, and stuffed his hands in his pockets "Besides, I don't really date girls anyway, you know…I don't want to be tied down and all"

"Right, I know" Jordan agreed, knowing that his friend was just blowing smoke right now "I was just saying, you know…"

"Right" Shane agreed. They continued walking for a few more minutes in silence before they began to hear the sounds of the crowd. They found a spot off to the side, about half way up where they could see Rayanne and Angela perfectly, but still off enough that they weren't noticed by the fans in the crowd. Angela looked amazing, in just simple dark jeans and a loose sheer tank top. The wind was lite, and she looked just effortless. Jordan's eyes misted over as he finally took in where they had come too. This was a new beginning for them, and he was more determined than ever to make sure that this time was perfect. He smiled when he saw her pick up her guitar; it was the same one that he'd given to her back in Three Rivers.

"Hello lovelies" Rayanne spoke softly into the microphone. The crowd clapped as she continued on "We're so proud to be a part of this tour, and we're even more proud of all of you for coming out and supporting these causes that mean so much to us" The crowd cheered, and Rayanne smiled at Angela. "This has been a long road for us, and we're so happy to get to share our stories with you guys here tonight" she leaned over and whispered to Angela, who nodded her head in agreement and then began to play the intro to a song. "This first song is an oldie, written in a time that is hopefully in the past". Shane smiled when Rayanne finally began to sing.

Fool that I am  
>For falling in love with you<br>And, fool that I am  
>For thinking you loved me too<p>

You took my heart  
>And then played the part of little coquette<br>All my dreams, they just disappeared  
>Like the smoke from a cigarette<p>

Fool that I am  
>For hoping you'd understand<br>And thinking you  
>Would listen too<br>And, oh, the things I had planned

But we couldn't see eye to eye  
>So, darling, darling, darling,<br>This is goodbye  
>But I still care<br>Fool that I am.  
>Oh, but I still care<br>Fool that I am.

"This is going to suck isn't it" Jordan said, clapping along with Shane.

"Well," he admitted "I guess it wouldn't be fair to say that you were allowed to write about what was going on in your head, and not let her do the same" Shane patted Jordan on the shoulder. "But hey, at least you know that this isn't what's going on anymore"

"Still stings a little though" Jordan admitted, looking towards the stage to see Angela wipe a tear from her eye and then smiling at Rayanne.

"Jordan? Shane?" Rickie's voice broke through the cheers of the crowd and caught their attention.

"Hey man, what's going on?" Jordan said, hugging Rickie and nodding in acknowledgement to Alex.

"We're just on our way to watch from backstage" he said, pointing to a small area just behind the stage, "You guys want to join us?"

"I don't know," Jordan said looking towards the stage where they had started in on another song.

"She'd not gonna get mad" Rickie interjected, picking up on Jordan's hesitance "She'll be happy when she gets off stage and you're there, she just doesn't like knowing your there before she goes on"

"Well, then you see" Shane said, pushing Jordan along "All that worrying for nothing, let's go so we don't miss anymore of the set"

"I didn't know you were such a fan" Rickie said, raising an eyebrow to Shane.

"I'm not…I just….you know, I mean, we came here for Jordan, I just…shut up" he huffed, pushing past him and heading towards backstage.

"He's a little sensitive about this subject" Jordan explained, "I wouldn't push it"

"Wouldn't dream of it" he said, following behind Shane.

The show continued on, and much to Jordan's discomfort, he was finding that every song they sang was about heart break and losing hope on love. He hated knowing that he was the reason that she was so hurt for so long. It was weird to hear the story of their break up in songs, told from the other side. He knew that his last album was all about being sorry and doing his best to show her how much he still loved her. It tore out his heart to hear that she was completely shutting down. When they started a cover of "Song for the Dumped" by Ben Folds Five, he almost got up and headed back to his bus.

"Hey," Rickie said, moving from his seat behind Jordan to stand next to him "I know this probably sucks for you" Jordan nodded a little in agreement "but you have to know, all these songs…they were just a way for her to let it out. She hasn't written anything new for a year, up until a few nights ago…I was beginning to worry that she wasn't going to be able to write anything without you."

"I just really hate myself right now" Jordan admitted, tearing up a little before swallowing the lump that was forming in his throat.

"Good" Rickie said, shocking Jordan with his honesty. "I don't mean it like that," he clarified "I just mean, hopefully you'll remember how you feel right now, and never do anything like this again"

"Trust me," Jordan nodded "I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure she never has a reason to be sad again."

"Alright, this is our last song of the night" Rayanne announced, causing everyone to quiet up and pay attention to her "Thank you guys so much for making this first show so special for us, and as a little thank you present, we're going to do a brand new song for you guys" she smiled when the crowd roared with excitement. "I know it's a little different from our usual stuff, but I'm hoping" she smiled at Angela who was biting her lip and nodding along with her "that this is a new direction for us. Please forgive us if it's little shaky tonight, we're still working on some of the kinks."

Is there a cure for this pain  
>Maybe I should have something to eat<br>But food won't take this emptiness away  
>I'm hungry for you my love<p>

Well I made it through another day  
>In my cold room<br>On scraps and pieces left behind  
>I survive on the memory of you<p>

All Of me is all for you  
>You're all I see<br>All of me is all for you  
>You're all I need<p>

Is there a remedy for waiting  
>For loves victorious return<br>Is there a remedy for hating  
>Every second that I'm without you<p>

All of me is all for you  
>You're all I see<br>All of me is all for you  
>You're all I need<p>

All this life is all for love  
>It's the only road Ill choose<br>And every street and avenue  
>Only one will lead me back to you<p>

One Love, One Love, One Love  
>One Love, One Love, One Love <p>

8 months ago…

Jordan was driving home from lunch with Caleb and Ashley. He had the windows down and his radio was turned up loud enough to drown out his thoughts. He wasn't really paying attention to what was being said on the radio, he was just enjoying the feeling of being alone for a little while, but he nearly drove off the road when her voice suddenly filled the air.

"We have on the phone singing duo Rayanne Graff and Angela Chase" Ryan Seacrest announced. Both girls said their hellos before Ryan continued on. "So, you guys are on the last leg of your European tour correct?"

"That's right" Rayanne answered "We're currently in Ireland, and we head to Spain next week"

"So it seems like things kind of took off pretty fast for you" Ryan commented.

"For sure" Rayanne agreed "We're just so grateful to everyone who supports us, and believes in what we have to say"

"Speaking of which," Ryan interrupted, "Most of your songs seem to share a common theme, can you share a little bit about your inspiration?"

Jordan drew in a breath as he waited to hear how they'd explain the situation. "Well," Angela started, "I guess it's just been about the stuff that we all go through. Everyone's had their heart broken at some point, and I think that's why people have been able to relate so well with us" she answered.

"So, no hard feelings for the unlucky guy?" Ryan pressed.

"You know," she sighed "People expect for me to say that I hate this person or whatever, but when you spend so much of your life in love with someone…it's just impossible to really hate them." Jordan pulled his car over to the side of the road and stared at the radio.

"I think what Angela is saying," Rayanne intervened "is that, even when people that you care about do things to hurt you, you still have a place for them in your heart. And no matter how impossible it seems at times, you know that there will always be a part of you, no matter how small, that belongs with that person."

Jordan stopped listening to the rest of the interview. It had been months since Angela had acknowledged any of his attempts at contact. To hear her on the radio, talking about him as if he had already become a part of her past was something he wasn't ready to hear. Slamming his hands on the steering wheel, he let out a deep breath and continued on his way home.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks for the reviews for the last chapter! Here's the update for the weekend, hopefully I'll have another one up by Monday. Let me know if there's anything you're wanting to happen, or a direction you want me to explore. I already have the next series of events mapped out, but I want you to like what you're reading so I'll try and make sure your ideas are heard. **

**Chapter 11. **

_Few things in my life offer the kind of rush I experience each time I take the stage with Rayanne. Driving really fast at night, that one time we went skydiving when our tour passed through Ireland, the first time I drove a car by myself…they were all moments that I felt powerful and alive. But better than all of them combined, is the rush I get each time I catch Jordan's eye…_

8 months ago…

"Don't be scared Angelika" Rayanne said, holding my hand from her spot right next to me. "We're doing this together, all of us" we smiled at Alex and Rickie who were sitting right across from us.

"It's just…really scary" I laughed nervously, squeezing her hand even tighter.

"It'll all be over in minutes" Alex beamed. It was his idea, and at the time we all thought it was the most brilliant idea we'd ever heard. But now that the idea had become a reality, I was getting very nervous.

"Yeah maybe or we'll all die" I said, acknowledging the elephant in the room. "I mean, what if our parachutes, like…don't open? I mean, I understand that this is supposed to be some big metaphor for like pushing the boundaries and staring death the face….but I just…I could be ok not looking death in the eyes directly today" we sat there in silence for a minute before we all broke into laughter. "I'm serious though, this is really dangerous…you guys don't have to do this for me" I said looking down at my feet embarrassed at how far I'd let this go.

"We're in this together" Alex said putting his arm around Rickie's shoulder and smiling across the way at me "When one of us needs shaken out of a funk, we all do what needs to be done to make sure that person feels better"

"Yeah," Rayanne joined in "This maybe about you this time, but you've always been there for me…and that night I almost died, it was you and Rickie that stayed with me" Rayanne's eyes started to water as she looked at me and smiled "You've always been there for me" she stressed again, "so there's nowhere else I'd rather be right now then here with you. And the day that you think you're better and you don't need me anymore, I'll still be there for you. We're family" she said reaching her hand across the plane and taking Rickie's hand in hers.

"Angie," Rickie said, crouching in front of me and taking one of my hands in his, "We're going to be ok. We're going to do this together, because it's us until the end of time; and when we're like old and wrinkly and hanging out on the front porch in our rocking chairs, we're going to be able to talk about the time we all went skydiving in Ireland because we were always there for each other. And when one of us needs support, we'll be able to remember that together we can do anything"

"I love you guys" I smiled "So much. I don't think I'll ever be able to say it enough"

"Guys," Rayanne interrupted, "If we don't hug right now, I think I might just die" she joked.

Alex jumped across the plane and we all sat in one big hug until it was time to jump. They were right, we made it to the ground safely and it was something that brought us closer together. We really were pillars of strength for each other. It wasn't until weeks later that I put the situation into perspective. Jumping out of a plane was exactly like being with Jordan. It was scary and exciting, a rush and surreal. When we broke up it was like that moment right before the parachute opens, and you get that pit in your stomach, like maybe it won't open and then you won't know what to do because without the parachute, you'll die. And then it does, and you reach the ground; and your safe but you're tired and really sad it's over. You think that you might want to go again, just to feel that alive one more time, but you're even more scared the second time around because you know how terrifying that moment was.

Present day…

I'm not sure I'll ever get used to people clapping after we sing. It's kind of a little embarrassing and little sad honestly. I mean, most of our stuff is kind of depressing, and about a really horrible time in my life, and it's just a little weird to know that while I'm holding in tears, people are like…cheering. Grabbing Rayanne's hand we hurried off stage and gathered our stuff before heading out back to meet up with Rickie and Alex.

Rounding the corner, I caught sight of Rickie and Alex talking with Shane and Jordan. He had his back to me, and I was glad because it gave me a chance to reach up and make sure my hair had stayed in place before he saw me. When Alex looked over their shoulders and waved, they both turned and I locked eyes with Jordan. His smile was as big as mine as he got up and met me half way. His arms circled my waist as mine went around his neck. It was like we were pieces of a puzzle that just fit perfectly together. I couldn't imagine anyone else ever feeling as good as him.

"Hey" he whispered grinning and tucking a few loose strands of hair behind my ears.

"Hi" I smiled back at him "Have you been here the whole time?"

A look of panic crossed his face before he began stammering over his words "Yeah, I know how you feel about it, but I just…it was Shane's idea…"

"It ok" I laughed lightly, "I'm glad you're here, we've spent enough time apart as it is, it's kind of nice just getting to see you waiting back here" I blushed, embarrassed at how girly I just sounded.

"I really missed that" Jordan said smiling down at me.

"Missed what?" I questioned.

"That blush you get" he said rubbing my cheek with his thumb, "whenever you get embarrassed." I covered my face with my hands, letting out a small laugh. "Yeah, that blush" he teased.

"Stop it" I fake pushed him "You're making it worse"

"Good" he smiled, pulling me back to him "I'd be ok with seeing that blush all night" he raised his eyebrows suggestively. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words were coming out. "So," he said, changing the subject for me, "What are your plans for the rest of the night?"

"I don't know" I said looking behind him to find that we were alone, "Usually we have a movie night after our first show, but it looks like they've already ditched me"

"Yeah, I hope you don't mind, but I kind of begged Rickie and Alex to let me steal you way for the night" Jordan said, grabbing my bag from me and leading me away from the stage.

"What did you have in mind?" I questioned, lacing my fingers with his and walking along side of him.

"Well, I figured you'd be hungry so I thought we could grab some take out and bring it back to your bus" he started "and then…well, I hate to curse us but I think that we should probably talk about some stuff"

"Sounds good, but where are they going to go?" I questioned talking about Rickie, Alex and Rayanne.

"This is where it gets kind of weird" he laughed, as we reached my bus; opening the door and then following me inside "Rickie and Alex are going to go grab a late dinner and movie, so they'll be out for a while, but uh…Rayanne is going to hang out on my bus with Shane" he said smirking.

"On your bus?" I questioned.

"Yep" Jordan nodded.

"With Shane" I clarified.

"Uh huh" he confirmed.

"Alone" I stated, wanting to be clear.

"Completely" he answered.

"I didn't think they liked each other" I said shocked that either of them would go along with this idea "whose idea was it?" I asked, taking my bag from him and putting on my bunk.

Jordan sat down at the little table while I rummaged through my stuff and began putting things away. "Actually, Shane said that it was so he could get like, something to hold against her as some sort of revenge or something, but I don't know what that could possibly mean" he said cryptically.

"Weird" I said, pulling out a small tin from my bag I smiled brightly and brought it over to the table and sat on the opposite side facing Jordan. "I almost forgot that my mom sent these back for you" I said, opening the lid to reveal homemade brownies "She said that she knows how much you love these-" I was cut off my Jordan reaching across and stealing one out of the tin. I laughed as he practically shoved the whole thing in his mouth.

"Mmmm" he groaned, closing his eyes and enjoying the brownie. I giggled, standing up and grabbing the almond milk from the fridge and grabbing a couple glasses. "You're mom makes the best brownies, like ever" he exclaimed grabbing another one out of the tin, ripping it in half and shoving it in his mouth. "I've missed these brownies" he drank some milk and then wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

I smiled and yawned, stretching and then leaning my elbows on the table in front of me. "So, you said that you wanted to talk?" I half questioned, hoping that whatever was going to come next wasn't going to be bad. Jordan nodded, and leaned back into his seat before clearing his throat and continuing on.

"I just want to make sure that everything is figured out" he said cautiously, "I want to make sure that we're on the same page and more than anything, I want to make sure you know that I'm so sorry for everything that I did"

"I know," I said quietly "I've always understood why it happened I guess, but it was just so hard for me to look at you and not see those pictures in my mind" Jordan opened his mouth to say something but I held up my hand in a motion for him to stop and let me continue, "I wasn't even sure what those pictures were about at the time. It took me days to convince myself that they were real, and even now there's a part of me that wishes they were some sort of fabrication, because the idea that you could have been with someone else in that way…it's just unbearable to think about" I said, staring at the glass of milk I was spinning in my hands.

"Angela" he said, making me look up and meet his gaze "I know that this doesn't change anything, but I don't even remember anything past the cab ride. Honestly, even if I did; I know that being with her was nothing compared to being with you, you have to know that" he pleaded.

"I know" I whispered "I just wish that it wasn't so public, I mean, those rumors about the two of you are still circulating"

"There's no way" Jordan said disbelievingly "I had our publicist issue statements about this to every magazine and gossip show he could get his hands on"

"We overheard some people earlier talking about whether or not she would be at any of the shows to watch you" I said, embarrassed for repeating the rumor "just hearing your names in the same sentence stings you know"

Jordan reached across the table and took my hands in his. Rubbing the back of my fingers with his thumbs, he took a deep breath and continued on. "After you stopped answering my calls, I started having all these dreams about you. Each time was different, but I always managed to find some way to get you to forgive me" huge pools were forming in his eyes and were threatening to fall, but he still kept going "but even when you forgave me, there was still something that would pull you away from me. It was like, nothing I did would keep you there" the tears began falling from his eyes and my heart broke at the sight in front of me. "I'm so sorry" he said, placing his head down on the table. He kept whispering his I'm sorry's, so low that I could barely hear them, but I knew they were there. Getting up from my side of the table, I sat down next to him and wrapped my arms around him.

We sat there, comforting and holding each other for what felt like hours. This day had been such a rollercoaster of emotions and I suddenly felt drained. I felt horrible knowing that he felt so bad and I didn't know what I could do or say to make it better. All that mattered to me in that moment, was taking care of him, and making sure he knew that I forgave him and wanted to be with him.

"Did I ever tell you about that day that the tabloids caught me and Alex together?" I asked, standing up and pulling him with me. He shook his head no, and looked at me cautiously. "Well," I said, leading him toward the back of the bus slowly "We had just figured out that we were going on this big tour overseas, and him and I had spent the morning looking for the perfect present for Rickie" I said, stopping just before we reached the bunks. I leaned against the cabinets on one side and Jordan propped himself on the opposite side of me "That's why we were going into that jewelry store, because Alex wanted to get a promise ring for Rickie. Anyway, I knew that I was about to be away from you for a while and I wanted something that would keep you with me at all times" I reached for the bottom of my shirt and pulled it up a little and at the same time pulling down the top of my jeans to reveal a red heart with a black "J" in the center. I bit my lip nervously as I watched him look at my tattoo for the first time. "I know it's kind of silly, but every time I looked at this heart I would think about you and just how completely and hopelessly in love with you I was."

A smile formed on his lips as his gaze moved from that spot on my hip to my face. Moving towards me, he placed his hand on my hip and traced the outline of the heart with his thumb. Licking his lips he placed his other hand behind my neck and pulled me as close as he could. "I love you so much" he breathed kissing my forehead.

"I love you too" I smiled, "I never stopped, not even for a second" I placed my hands on his chest and ran them up to his shoulders and into his hair. "Stay with me tonight?" I quietly asked pulling him backwards the rest of the way to my bunk. He nodded his head and shut the door behind him.

I turned to face him once we reached my bunk, licking my lips and taking a small breath, I lifted onto my toes so I was eye level with him and put my hands on his chest. He rested his hands on my hips and licked his lips as well. My mind was completely clouded over, and I was having trouble keeping my train of thought. I was so nervous, like it was the first time we'd ever been together. I could feel his heart racing under my hands and I felt a little comforted knowing he was just as nervous as I was.

When his lips finally met mine for the first time in years the emotion was so overwhelming all the breath left my body. It became such a powerful moment, and our bodies responded to each other's touch almost instantly.

Picking me up, I wrapped my legs around his waist and tightened my arms around his neck. He was kissing me with such urgency and desire, like he was making up for all that lost time with each kiss. He pushed me up against the door for leverage and moved his hands to my face, cupping it in his hands he pulled back and looked me in the eye. "Are you sure you're ready for this?" he questioned softly.

I nodded, sure that I wouldn't be able to speak even if I tried. Pulling away from the wall he sat me down and kissed me softly. I reached for the bottom of his shirt and pulled it over his head, peppering his chest with kisses. I stopped long enough for him to remove my shirt as well, before continuing with my task of kissing every inch of his body. Making my way back to his face, I kissed his lips and pulled away. His face held a mixture of lust and peace. We stood there just staring at each other for a few minutes, smiling and enjoying the feeling of finally getting to be with each other again.

"Say it again" I whispered

"I'm sorry" he replied

"No, not that" I smiled, "Don't ever say that again. Tell me you love me again" I begged.

"I love you" he smiled, kissing the tip of my nose "I will always love you"

"I love you" I grinned back, reaching for the button on his jeans, unbuttoning them and sliding them off "I never stopped loving you, and I never will"


	12. Chapter 12

**I spent all weekend working on the next chapter. I'm worried that the story isn't flowing out as fast now that I've got the first part out…but since this is the first story I've written I'm not sure if that is natural or not. Hopefully it will flow again for me, but we'll just have to wait and see. So anyway, here is the next chapter for you guys…hope you like it, let me know if you don't **

**Chapter 12.**

_Have you ever woken up from sleeping and were completely unsure of whether or not the events from the night before were reality…or if they were just a vivid dream that was taunting you?_

Present day…

Jordan stretched, smiling as the events from the night before flooded his memory. Slowly opening his eyes his smile disappeared as he noticed that Angela wasn't lying next to him. The fear of what that could mean started to overtake his mind, and he closed his eyes again covering his face with his hands. Did she wake up and freak out? Was she really not ready to forgive him? What if he moved too fast and now she was running from the reality of their situation? Sighing, he opened his eyes again and stared at the roof above his head.

The door in between the kitchen and the bunks opened, and his eyes flew from the roof to the door and he sighed a sigh of relief as Angela tip toed in and then climbed up onto the bunk next to Jordan and nestled herself back next to his side.

"It's so cold in here" she mumbled, pulling the blankets up around her and Jordan. He wrapped his arms tighter around her and closed his eyes again.

"Where'd you go?" he asked, hoping he didn't sound like he was afraid of her answer.

"I was making some coffee" she yawned, "I know you're going to have to go soon, and I wanted it to be ready when you woke up"

"What time is it?" he questioned, smiling at her gesture.

"About 8:45" she answered, lazily drawing circles on Jordan's chest. Jordan sighed contently, knowing he had about an hour before he had to leave for his sound check. He turned a little to his side, facing Angela and pushing her hair away from her face. She smiled a small smile and then leaned forward and kissed his lips sweetly.

"I wish we could stay here all day" Jordan whispered longingly.

"Me too" she agreed "but Shane and Rayanne should be back any time so we should probably get up" she pouted playfully. Jordan smiled and shook his head no. "No?" Angela giggled reading his expression.

"If we just stay here, exactly like this…then everything else will just disappear" Angela bit her lip and scooted a little closer to Jordan. He wrapped his arm protectively around her shoulder and pulled her flush against his body. "I want to wake up to this for the rest of my life" he breathed deeply.

"That sounds perfect" Angela agreed, kissing his neck and working her way up to his mouth. Jordan couldn't believe that just 24 hours ago he and Angela were still this unanswered question, and now here they were, waking up together and happy. He was the happiest he'd been in years last night when she shared her tattoo with him, just remembering that moment was getting him worked up again. Reaching his hand down to her hip, he raised her shirt and rubbed circles over the location of that small heart. It was still so unreal to him; Angela, his sweet, innocent Angela had branded herself with his initial.

She moaned into his mouth as he flipped them over so he was hovering on top of her without breaking contact. She reacted almost instantly, grinding her hips underneath him and exploring his body with her hands. Jordan smiled against her lips as he moved his hand from her hip up her body and grazing her breast with his thumb. She arched her back, pushing herself into his touch. Perfect. That was exactly what this moment was, Jordan thought, perfect.

Rayanne stormed in through the door and then stumbled backwards. "Sorry" she said, smiling and covering her eyes "Didn't know that I was interrupting anything" she laughed.

"Well, you kind of are" Jordan barked, moving from his position on top and collapsing in a huff next to Angela who had buried herself under the covers in embarrassment.

"We've been calling for you guys for like 5 minutes" she said defensively, uncovering her eyes "When you didn't answer we just assumed you were still sleeping"

"What's taking so long" Shane complained, coming in behind Rayanne and laughing at the sight in front of him. "Nice Catalano" he beamed at his friend.

"Out!" Jordan ordered "Both of you out now!"

"Ok, ok" Shane smiled, "Just be quick, we have to be at the stage in like 10 minutes"

Jordan threw the pillow towards Shane who had shut the door just in time. Sighing deeply, he lifted the covers and found Angela laughing silently next to him. "What's so funny Miss Chase?" he smiled down at her.

"That was so embarrassing" she laughed out loud "I think that's the first time Rayanne's ever walked in on us" she kissed his cheek and moved to get out of bed.

"Where do you think you're going" Jordan questioned, pulling her back and kissing her lips.

"We do not have time for this" she sighed, kissing him while pulling her body away from his hands. "You need to get out of here for your show, and I have to head out to the radio station in a little bit" she frowned, finally making it out of bed and standing on the opposite side of the bunk away from Jordan's grasp.

"You're so mean" he pouted, sitting up and searching for his clothes "You got me all worked up and now I have to spend the day without you" he huffed, slipping on his jeans and throwing his shirt on over his head.

"Awe, poor baby" Angela jokingly said, standing in front of him and slipping her arms around his waist "I promise to make it up to you later" she purred nibbling on his ear.

"You promise" he groaned, taking in a deep breath as she began moving her hands down his torso. She nodded her head in agreement, and he kissed her deeply. The knocking on the door broke them out of their trance as he heard Shane yell for him to finish up. Angela's face grew a shade of pink and he smiled before kissing her one last time. Taking her hand in his he led them out towards the front of the bus.

"Finally" Shane joked, "I was beginning to think we were gonna have to hose you two down"

"Funny" Jordan scowled dryly at his friend. Angela handed him a cup of coffee and smiled sweetly at him. His scowl quickly turned to a smile as he pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head.

"Hey Graff" Shane pouted "Where's my coffee?"

"Looks like it's still in the pot" she answered, not looking up from the magazine she was skimming.

"Please, you need to back off with all this sweet behavior, I might start to get spoiled" Shane commented sarcastically, standing up and moving towards the door "I'll wait for you outside" he said to Jordan, before disappearing outside.

"Rayanne" Angela said warningly "Why are you always so mean to him"

"I don't want to talk about it" She huffed, standing up and moving towards the bunks and slamming the door.

Angela huffed, before turning her attention back to Jordan. "I'll be thinking about you today" she smiled pushing him towards the door, "have a good show" she kissed him sweetly on the lips.

"I'm gonna miss you" he smiled, holding on to her hand "call me as soon as your free" she nodded as he stepped outside, shutting the door he took a sip of his coffee and yawned. Turning he found Shane sulking against the bus.

"So," Jordan began walking towards their car "Want to tell me how last night went?" he climbed in the driver's seat as Shane settled himself in next to him. His foot was tapping along to the beat his hands were playing on his knee.

"Not really" he mumbled, chewing on the side of his thumb, shaking his knee up and down. Jordan knew this meant he shouldn't push it, pulling out of their parking space and heading towards the opposite side of the fairgrounds he continued on.

"Ok, well you want to hear about my night?" he questioned, trying to fill the awkward silence that filled the air.

"She's just so frustrating!" Shane exclaimed, "Believe it or not, we actually got along great last night" he half yelled, slamming his fists against the dash board "We watched a movie and then she cooked this pasta dish that was incredible, and we played around with the acoustics that were laying around" he sighed looking towards Jordan "I know it was just one night…but" he stopped, and looked out the window.

"But what?" Jordan questioned cautiously, unsure why Shane was so upset.

"Forget it" Shane pouted dejectedly. The last minute before they reached the stage was filled with a tense silence. Jordan could tell there was something more to what happened last night, but he couldn't figure out what it was.

Getting out of the car, he followed Shane backstage and was met with Caleb and their touring manager Justin. Both of them looked at Jordan questioningly when Shane stormed past them and headed on to the stage without a word.

"I think he had a rough night" he said, answering their questioning looks. "Probably better that we not push it though" he said, following the path that Shane had just taken. Caleb caught up with Jordan and patted him on the shoulder.

"Congrats man" he smiled.

"Congrats?" he questioned.

"You totally had sex last night" he winked, heading up the stairs towards the stage.

"How did you know?" he asked, catching up with Caleb and slipping on his guitar.

"You walk different" he said, tuning his guitar and adjusting levels on the amp next to him "and you get this dreamy look in your eyes" he joked.

"I do not" Jordan smiled, adjusting the mic stand.

"Sure you do" Caleb laughed "We all have tells; I whistle for like two hours the morning after I have sex, you get this weird spring in your step, and Shane gets all twitchy" he said, playing the base line for their opening number.

Jordan's eyes grew wide as he turned and looked at Shane. He was bouncing his knee up and down and his hands were tapping out a fast beat on his snare drum. "_and Shane gets all twitchy_" Caleb's words echoed in Jordan's head. He turned back around and closed his eyes.

This was going to get messy.

5 years ago…

"If you don't stop trying to "help" me I'm going to stab you with this tent pole" Rayanne warned Shane, pushing him away from the tent.

"Why can't you stop being such a bitch for like 5 minutes and admit that you need help" Shane huffed, pointing at the tent that was laying in shambles at Rayanne's feet.

"I don't need help," she mumbled stubbornly "I just need a little bit of time to get it put together." She turned her back on Sane and looked awkwardly at the poles in her hand.

"Well, I hope that time is fast" Shane replied, turning and walking towards his tent as the thunder roared overhead "looks like there's gonna be a storm tonight" he joked, climbing into his tent and zipping it shut.

Rayanne looked up to the sky and sighed. Jordan and Angela had left a little bit ago to find some wood for a fire, and Rickie had taken the car back into town to grab something he'd forgotten at home, which Rayanne was sure was just an excuse to get out of having to camp outside. She returned to her task of putting her tent together, which seemed more and more impossible the more she looked at it. 10 minutes later, she'd finally managed to get the tent in a somewhat standing position only to have it collapse when the rain started.

Looking around and realizing she didn't have any other options, she stomped towards Shane's tent and climbed in, rezipping it behind her.

"Awe" Shane mocked in a fake baby voice "Couldn't get your tent put together on your own?" Rayanne shot him a warning glance.

"It was up" she pointed out "It just sort of…fell…" she huffed, pulling her knees to her chest and resting her head on her knees. "This is already the worst camping trip ever"

"Well" Shane smirked "if you want some ideas on how to turn this trip around…" he wiggled his eyebrows at her.

"Why does it always come back to that with you?" she bit at him "I don't know how many times I have to tell you this, but I don't do relationships"

"Who said anything about a relationship?" Shane questioned "I'm just saying that you and me, we're like the same kind of person…it could be a simple hookup and there wouldn't be any feelings on the line"

"It would never be simple between us" she sighed "You're tied to Jordan, and I'm tied to Angela" she said like it was the simplest thing in the world "It would start off as just a simple hookup, but then we'd end up hanging out without them, and before you know it…it would stop being this fun little fling and instead turn into this relationship that neither of us want"

"Wow Graff" Shane breathed out slowly "You really know how to kill the mood"

"Yeah" she agreed, pulling her knees in tighter towards her chest.

"Well, we can still have some fun" Shane mumbled, pulling out his flask and grabbing a deck of cards "up for a little game?" he asked waving the cards in front of her.

An hour later Rayanne finished off the last of the flask and laid her cards down in front of Shane. "Read em and weep" she smiled "You really suck at this game" she laughed.

"Hey now" Shane chuckled "In my defense, I've been a little distracted tonight" he motioned towards the empty flask lying beside Rayanne. "Besides, how was I supposed to know you were going to turn out to be a closet poker genius?"

"I told you, my mom worked in Vegas when I was in elementary school and she taught me how to play." She smiled, leaning back against the sleeping bag behind her.

"Did you move around a lot?" Shane asked, laying down beside her and putting his hands behind his head.

"For a few years it felt like we were moving every other month, not that it really mattered cause I never really made many friends anywhere we went" she said softly "but then we moved to Three Rivers, and I met Rickie in class" she smiled at the memory "and for the first time I really felt like I had a friend that understood me…someone that I didn't think I could say goodbye too" her eyes glassed over for a fraction of a second before she continued on "My mom came home from work one night and found us playing around in the living room and just decided that we were going to stay; I think she knew what all that moving around was doing to me"

"You're lucky" Shane interrupted, gaining a questioning glance from Rayanne "My mom had to work so hard just to keep food on the table for me and my brothers. I would go days without seeing my mom sometimes, and even then it would only be for like minutes in passing" he explained "I grew up in Tennessee, we didn't move to Three Rivers until I was 7. Things were easier there, cause my dad was there so my mom was home all the time. When he died it was just too hard for my mom to stay there, so we just packed the car and drove. Our car broke down in Three Rivers and we just never left." He sighed, "Do you think that why we're so screwed up?"

"What do you mean?" she questioned, turning on her side to face Shane.

"I mean, my mom was never there, so I don't like to stick around girls for that long; and you moved so much so you never learned how to build connections…" he explained.

Rayanne huffed, "You know, you're not nearly as dumb as you look" she joked.

"Thanks doll" Shane laughed at their situation.

Rayanne rolled onto her stomach and peeped out the corner of the tent, sighing she rolled back onto her back and moaned. "It looks like it's gonna rain for the rest of the night" she whined. "I knew when Angela suggested this "fun" little trip there wouldn't be much fun involved"

Shane moved from his spot to lay on his stomach by the entrance of the tent. Unzipping the flaps a little and pulling them back, he rested his head on his hands and peered out at the rain that was steadily falling. "It's not so bad" he commented, glancing at Rayanne before focusing his gaze back outside, "I like the rain, there's something soothing about it"

Rayanne turned over and laid next to Shane, smiling a little "Yeah, I guess it is kind of nice" she said softly. Shane looked at her and chuckled. "What?" she questioned, smiling along with him.

"Nothing" he said, shaking his head and smiling again "It's just, I think that this is the first time we've actually agreed about something"


	13. Chapter 13

**So I think I have an idea for where I'm going next, it's just going to be a matter of getting the ideas into a chapter. Thanks for your encouraging words; and I'm glad you are still hanging in there with me while I attempt to figure the rest of this. I know that some of the interaction between Shane and Rayanne is choppy and little short, but I did that on purpose because of their characters and because I don't want to give too much of them away too fast. They are both people that are hard to get to the core of and it just felt unnatural to have their story unravel so fast. I hope that explains my motivation for them a little better. I hope to update again on Friday night because I have a friend coming to spend the weekend with me and I won't be able to update on Sunday like I normally do. Anyway…hope you like this, please let me know if you do **

**Chapter 13.**

_Sometimes you think that you think that you have everything figured out, and then out of nowhere something comes along that makes you realize that you can never have it all figured out…_

"So you guys are like, back together?" Rickie questioned, reaching across the table grabbing the syrup and pouring some over his waffles and then passing it to Alex.

"Yeah" I smiled and nodded, licking some syrup off my finger. "I mean, we didn't really talk about what's going to happen now, but I can just feel it, you know"

"So how was it?" Alex beamed in my direction, taking a huge bite of his food.

I blushed at the bluntness of his question, before giggling and biting into my food as well. "Amazing" I said after swallowing the mouthful I had "It was like nothing I've ever experienced" I half whispered "After he fell asleep, I just laid there, staring his face. I just wanted to burn that moment into my brain" I smiled lightly, "I don't know how it's possible that I can be so happy"

"It's so good to see you smile like this" Rickie said, reaching across and taking my hand in his and squeezing it softly.

"Can you pass the salt" Rayanne spoke up, not looking up from her plate. Alex passed it over, and we just all looked at each other questioningly. Rayanne had been unusually quiet all morning, and we were beginning to wonder if she would ever spill what was bothering her. "What?" she asked, shoving the last of her waffle into her mouth.

"Nothing sweetie" Rickie replied awkwardly "It's just, well…we're just kind of wondering what happened last night"

"What do you mean, what happened?" She said, standing up and placing her plate into the sink. "I told you guys nothing happened."

"You just seem like there's something on your mind" Alex poked on "You know we're here to listen if you want to talk right?" he said, standing up and meeting her eye.

"And if there was something to talk about then I'd talk" she said sternly "but since I'm not talking, maybe you guys could take that as a hint that there's nothing going on and you should just leave it alone?" she bit, storming off towards the back of the bus.

"Guys" I said, standing up and looking in the direction she just went "Could we meet you at the radio station? I'm going to go check on her" They both nodded in agreement and headed out.

I was worried about Rayanne. She was always so open about her feelings, especially with Alex, and it was a little off putting to know that she was hiding something from all of us. I slowly made my way towards the back, and nocked softly on the door to the bunks. "Raynie?"

"Yeah" she sniffed; opening the door a little I saw her sitting on the floor with her back against one of the beds. Her knees were pulled tightly to her chest and she was picking at the corner of her shoe. I walked in and sat down next to her. "I told you that there's nothing to talk about" she whispered as a tear fell down her cheek.

"On the day that you think you don't need me, I'm still going to be here" I said softly, repeating the words she'd once said to me. Her chin began to tremble, as she laid her head on my shoulder. Looping her arm under mine we sat there holding hands and not saying another word. I knew that she wouldn't talk until she was ready, but I knew that it was my time to be there for her even if I didn't know what it was that was bothering her. "Do you want me to call Rickie and have him cancel the radio show?" I asked. She shook her head no, removing her hand from mine and wiping the tears from her face.

"No" she said finally, standing up "Playing will be a good distraction right now" she headed towards the door, stopping just before she left the room, "Thank you" she whispered, not turning to face me.

We headed to the radio station in silence. Once we arrived, it was like nothing had happened that morning. Rayanne was smiling, signing autographs and taking pictures with the small crowed that had gathered to watch our set. I looked nervously at Rickie a few times who was watching the show Rayanne was putting on with a pained expression on his face. There was something a little strange about being back in this situation again, worrying about Rickie who was worrying about Rayanne. I suddenly felt like we were all back in high school again and we were just waiting for the big disaster to hit.

"We're so glad to have you here with us today" Ryan said as we all settled into our places on the small stage they'd set up for us.

"It's good to be here" Rayanne smiled, sitting down and adjusting her mic stand. I smiled at Ryan and slipped my guitar strap over my shoulder.

"So word on the street is that you guys debuted a new song at your show last night" he asked Rayanne, "Any chance we'll hear that today?"

"If you're lucky" Rayanne joked coyly "But we're feeling a little nostalgic today, and if you guys don't mind we were thinking about starting off with a few of our older songs" she looked towards the crowd and they started clapping. She smiled brightly, "Good. Now most of you know that Angela writes all of our songs, but back when we first started out, I actually wrote a couple songs with her help. We never recorded this one, but it's always been a special song for us and we'd like to play it for you today. It's called_ Tennessee_"

I never had all the answers  
>I never had enough time<br>But I sure had all the reasons  
>Why you weren't what I wanted to find<p>

I never laid all my cards out  
>You just wanted to play<br>The King he waited on my doorstep  
>While the joker and me went on our way<p>

Maybe I was much to selfish  
>But baby you're still on my mind<br>Now I'm grown and all alone  
>And wishing I was with you tonight<br>Cause I can guarantee  
>Things are sweeter in Tennessee<p>

These Days everything Is all business  
>Never in one place for too long<br>And there's no lack of arms around me  
>But I still wonder if somewhere I went wrong<p>

Maybe I was much to selfish  
>But baby you're still on my mind<br>Now I'm grown and all alone  
>And wishing I was with you tonight<br>Cause I can guarantee  
>Things are sweeter in Tennessee<p>

And I'd wish on every star in the  
>Southeren sky<br>For that man and our life  
>If I did not think that<p>

Maybe I was much to selfish  
>But baby you're still on my mind<br>Now I'm grown and all alone  
>And wishing I was with you tonight<br>Cause I can guarantee  
>Things are sweeter in Tennessee<p>

The crowd clapped as Ryan made his way back onto the stage. "That's a beautiful song" he said, holding his microphone and standing in between me and Rayanne. "Why didn't you guys ever record it?"

"It was just one of those things that never worked out" Rayanne said honestly "Which is kind of ironic because of who the song is about"

"And who is the song about?" Ryan asked.

"Huh?" Rayanne said looking at Ryan in a panic.

"You just said that the song was ironic because of who it was about, and I was just wondering who that person was" he pushed.

Rayanne looked to me, opening her mouth to respond, but words weren't coming out.

"It was about an old boyfriend of mine" I spoke up, keeping my eyes locked with hers. Ryan looked at me suspiciously, and I was sure he was going to ask more questions, but Rayanne spoke up in time.

"Anyway, we have a few more songs we want to share with you today before we move on to our new stuff" she said, focusing her attention back on the crowd. Ryan smiled at me, although I know he was a little pissed that we side stepped his questions. I strummed at my guitar, and acted like I didn't notice. "This next song is about that time right after a break up and finding a way to take your mind off it for a second and finding out that's not possible; it's called _Wake up Older_"

Slept in my makeup  
>didn't get my teeth brushed<br>Crashed on the couch  
>and now my mouth tastes like yesterday's news<p>

well, hello Jim Beam  
>oh the places you've seen<br>if only you could talk  
>you'd tell me why he walked out on me and you<p>

oh the things lovers do when it's over  
>oh the things lovers do when it's done<br>find a cool bottle or a warm shoulder  
>wake up older<br>try to move on

I drove around last night  
>thinkin' bout our last fight<br>I cruised by your house and  
>all the lights were out<br>and you were gone

so I found me a stranger  
>well there's comfort in danger<br>but I thought about you  
>the whole time we<br>were gettin it on

oh the things lovers do when it's over  
>oh the things lovers do when it's done<br>find a cool bottle or a warm shoulder  
>wake up older<br>try to move on

find a cool bottle  
>or a warm shoulder<br>wake up older  
>wake up older<p>

slept in my makeup  
>didn't get my teeth brushed<br>crashed on the couch  
>now my mouth tastes like yesterday's news...<p>

We continued on through the rest of our set. It felt natural and easy for me, but I could tell Rayanne was struggling to make it through each song. She looked tired, even though I'm sure that no one other than me, Rickie and Alex could tell. We finished up with our new song and then hung around for a meet and greet with the people that showed up for the show.

Back on the bus we all sat around the main cabin watching a movie while Rayanne sat at the table, busily writing away on her laptop. Nobody spoke for what felt like hours, until Alex sneezed and Rayanne said gesundheit. It was a good 45 minutes before the silence was broken again.

Getting up from the table Rayanne came and sat down on the bench seat I was at and put her feet up on my lap. "Ok, this silence is killing me; let's just get this talk over with." We all stared at her, no one wanting to be the first to break the silence. She rolled her eyes and continued on. "I slept with Shane last night" she said casually, causing Rickie to spit out the soda he was drinking.

"You're joking" I said, unable to believe what I was hearing.

"It's not like it's a big deal," she said, staring at her hands "it wasn't the first time we've done it"

"How many times have you done it?" Alex said, trying to hide the smile that was forming on his face.

"In general or with him" Rayanne joked causing Alex to giggle. "I don't know, six…seven times maybe…I don't exactly keep track"

"You've slept with Shane six or seven times and we're just now hearing about it?" I asked completely shocked at this new found information.

"It wasn't supposed to be this big deal" she said frowning a little bit.

"When was the first time?" Rickie asked, unable to hide his smile.

"You remember that camping trip that we took after graduation-"she started.

"You've been sleeping with him for that long!" I exclaimed, "Rayanne! That was like 5 years ago! How are we just now finding out about it?"

"Well, up until last night it was always just this casual thing" she defended "Whenever we'd see each other, we'd just sort of end up hooking up. It was like the perfect arrangement too, because no one knew so we weren't expected to like…talk about our feelings or whatever"

"So what happened last night that changed things?" Alex asked.

"I don't even know" she answered "You guys have seen us together…we just don't make sense. We fight constantly; he's just so annoying and always like…whatever; but last night he was like, talking with me about stuff…and after we slept together, he…" she stopped like she couldn't find the words to say.

"What did he do?" I asked, suddenly over the shock and very interested in what could have happened next.

She gulped and closed her eyes "He tried to cuddle with me". We all sat there for a second, wondering when she was going to continue on, and when she didn't we looked at each other and started laughing. "It's not funny" she protested, opening her eyes and staring at us like we had three heads.

"Raynie" Rickie laughed "It sounds like you had a perfectly fine evening, why are you freaking out about this?"

"Cause we don't cuddle. You and Alex-cuddle. Jordan and Angela-cuddle. Me and Shane, we can't cuddle…I don't want him to want to cuddle with me" she said, trying to stand up but I pulled her back down next to me.

"Why?" I asked trying to understand what was going on in her mind.

"Cause then that means it more than just a fling…things like this, they don't work out for people like me…" she said quietly.

"It's ok to be scared Rayanne," Alex said "But you can't run from this forever"

"I'm not running" she said, getting angry and pulling away from me "I just don't want get involved with him"

"Why not?" I asked confused as to what the real problem here was.

"Cause I'm not like you, ok?" she yelled crying "I'm not going to let myself get hurt" she stormed off the bus, slamming the door behind her. I stood up and ran after her. Once I caught up with her I pulled her arm and turned her around so she was facing me.

"Hey" I barked "Don't you dare look down on me for not being like you" I fumed.

"Look down on you?" she questioned with confusion "Don't you get it? I wish I could be like you, but I can't. I wish that I could have what you have, but I can't"

"You could have it, you just have to let yourself have it" I argued.

"No I can't" she exclaimed "Not with Shane. Because if it doesn't work out, I'm still going to have to see him…not just on this tour, but forever. Our lives are intertwined now because of you and Jordan. I can't risk having to see him all the time if he breaks my heart" she cried.

I pulled her into a hug and cried with her.

Earlier that morning…

Rayanne tried to roll over in her sleep but something was holding her tight in her position. Slowly opening her eyes, she looked down and suddenly felt closed in. Her breathing picked up, and she could feel the walls closing in as Shane's grip tightened on her. She wiggled her way out from under his arm without waking him and tip toed out of room slowly and quietly shut the door behind her. Making her way to the sink she fumbled around and managed to fill a glass with water, drinking the whole thing down in one gulp. Dropping the glass in the sink she placed both hands on the counter and focused on getting her breathing to slow to a normal pace. Closing her eyes, she took one last deep breath before finally feeling normal again.

Her whole body tensed when she felt Shane's arms wrap around her from behind. "Morning doll" he whispered, kissing her temple and then moving towards the coffee pot on the other side of the sink.

"We should probably get going right?" she questioned, wanting desperately to get out of the confines of the bus.

"There's no rush" Shane shrugged, biting into an apple and leaning against the shelves opposite of Rayanne. She sighed and turned to face him.

"Don't you guys have a sound check or something" she pushed.

"Yeah," he shrugged "but it's not like it's gonna start before we get there" he looked at her questioningly, pushing away from the counter and starting to move back towards her.

"I think I'm gonna get going" she pushed away from the sink and headed towards the door "So, I guess I'll see ya around" she said, running off the bus and burying her face in her hands. Moaning, she let out a deep breath and headed in the direction of her bus.

She only made it a few feet before Shane caught up with her and slung his arm around her shoulder. She looked sideways at him in utter horror and he grinned cheekily at her. "What are you doing?" she asked awkwardly.

"What do you mean?" he asked as she shrugged his arm off her shoulder. A brief pained look crossed his face before he recovered, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I…uh…I was just coming to pick up Jordan" he said, clearing his throat and scratching the back of his head.

"Oh…" Rayanne breathed, picking up her pace, wrapping her arms around her body. Shane followed her the rest of the way to her bus about a foot behind her; they didn't say another word to each other.


	14. Chapter 14

**Here's the update like I promised! I'm feeling more confident with the direction that the story is heading and I think that's why the story is starting to flow again. Please let me know what you think and I'll try to update as soon as I can next week!**

**Chapter 14. **

_I guess you never can know everything about a person…there's always going to be secrets that they're keeping and secrets you wish you never found out about…_

Jordan felt very uncomfortable sitting next to Shane on the way to the meet and greet. He was certain that something had happened the night before between him and Rayanne; and if he was being completely honest with himself, he knew exactly what that something was. The problem was he didn't know how to bring it up, or even if he should bring it up. Shane was always there for him whenever he needed to talk, but this was foreign territory for him and he just wasn't sure what to say. He didn't think "So you're screwing Graff huh?" would be the best way to broach the subject.

Caleb wasn't being much help either. He kept making jokes about being the only one to not get laid the night before, and with each joke Jordan would look nervously at Shane to see what his reaction was going to be. But his expression was next to impossible to read; sometimes he'd laugh along with Caleb, and other times he wouldn't even take his gaze away from the window. It was making it near impossible for Jordan to figure out what to say next. Should he play along? Should he just pretend he never figured it out? Was he the only one who figured it out? Did Angela know? The questions were making his head spin.

"What do you think Catalano?" Caleb asked from his spot in the front seat.

"Huh?" he said, completely unsure of what they were talking about.

"What do you think about heading out of town tonight instead of tomorrow?" Caleb repeated, "We can get a jump on all the traffic and be in Vegas a little early"

"I think it's a great idea" Shane said, finally shaking himself out of his day dream and focusing in on the conversation for the first time that morning "I'm ready to just hit the bars and forget all about this city for a little while"

"Yeah, sure…sounds great" he said, trying to sound as convincing as possible. Truth be told, he hated the idea; he was hoping to spend a quiet night with Angela, but he knew that Shane needed to get away fast and he had always been willing to do anything for his friend.

"Great!" Shane smiled, clapping his hands once for emphasis "Let's get this meet and greet over with, and then blow this joint" he jumped out of the car as soon as it was stopped and headed inside.

"This is going to be a long night" Jordan sighed looking at Caleb for confirmation.

"Look" Caleb smiled shaking his head and putting his arm around Jordan's shoulder as they walked towards the building "I don't know what's going on, and I'm not sure I want to know what's going on; what I do know is that Shane needs a night to just let loose and forget about whatever it is that's eating away at that brain of his. And what better place than Vegas and what better people than you and me to help him out?"

"You're right" Jordan agreed, stopping before they reached the doors "Give me a minute…I'll be right in" he said, pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialing Angela.

"Hey babe" she greeted brightly after only one ring. Jordan smiled naturally, his heart sinking knowing he wasn't going to see her that night.

"Hey" he greeted "So I kind of have some bad news…" he started.

"Yeah, me too" Angela interrupted "We kind of have some emergency band stuff going on so I'm not going to be able to see you tonight" she said softly.

"That's what my news was" he sighed, relieved that he wasn't the only reason they were going to be apart tonight.

"I'll miss you though" Angela purred softly "…all of you"

Jordan moaned into the phone "You don't play fair Miss Chase" he chuckled when he heard Rayanne and Rickie laughing in the background.

"I got to go" Angela laughed, "I'll call you later if I can"

"Bye" he said, hanging up his phone and heading into the meet and greet.

A few hours later they were loaded up into the bus and over half way to Vegas.

"So we should make it into Vegas at about 1 in the morning" Caleb said, lounging on the bench seat and tossing a Nerf football back and forth with Jordan who was sitting on the counter caddy corner from him. Shane sat on the bench seat opposite of Caleb and was mindlessly strumming on one of the many acoustic guitars they had laying around.

"You got a name for that song?" Jordan asked, throwing the football back to Caleb.

"Nah" he said continuing on without looking up.

"I like it" Caleb commented "We should try and use it. Does it have any lyrics?"

"I don't know," Shane shrugged, suddenly feeling a little self-conscience

"Let's hear it Shaney boy" Jordan smiled. He'd never heard Shane's lyrics before, he knew that he wrote stuff because he'd see him doing it periodically, but he'd never been brave enough to actually sing in front of anyone.

"It's not that good" he said, looking anywhere but at Caleb or Jordan.

"Come on man" Caleb pushed, "it's just us. Besides, you've heard some of the crap that Catalano writes, it can't be much worse than that" he joked.

"Hey!" Jordan fake pouted, throwing the football at Caleb's head.

Shane laughed, and sat up a little be straighter. "Ok, but it's not finished, so don't make fun of me"

He said "I am the devil, boy, come with me  
>And we'll make many storms"<br>He offered me the universe  
>But inside my heart there's a picture of a girl<p>

Some call love a curse, some call love a thief  
>But she's my home<br>And she's as much apart for this broken heart, but see  
>Broken bones always seem to mend<p>

I'll taste the devil's tears  
>Drink from his soul, but I'll never give up you<br>I'll taste the devil's tears  
>Drink from his soul, but I'll never give up you<p>

He said "I am the devil, boy,  
>Come with me and we'll break many laws"<br>He offered me eternal life but inside my heart there's a picture of a girl

Some call love a curse, some call love a thief  
>But she's my home and she<br>And she's as much apart for this broken heart, but see  
>Broken bones always seem to mend<p>

I'll taste the devil's tears  
>Drink from his soul, but I'll never give up you<br>I'll taste the devil's tears  
>Drink from his soul, but I'll never give up you<p>

"Wow" Caleb said sitting up straight once Shane finished his last chord.

"You've totally been holding out on us man" Jordan said, jumping down from the counter and going over to sit next to Shane.

"It's nothing" Shane shrugged "I don't want to use it though, if that's ok" he said, looking at Caleb and Jordan seriously.

"That's up to you man" Caleb replied "but I think it's a damn shame" he got up and headed back towards the bunks and closed the door.

"It's really good" Jordan said "but I understand if you're not ready for people to hear it"

"I've been sleeping with Rayanne" Shane blurted out bowing his head closing his eyes.

"Wait 'sleeping'…as in more than once?" Jordan exclaimed. Shane nodded silently. "How long?"

"Once or twice a year for the last 5 years" Shane admitted, opening his eyes and looking at Jordan.

"Wow" Jordan mumbled, leaning back against the seat.

"It wasn't a big deal at first" Shane admitted, "It was actually kind of perfect. We'd meet up randomly, fight, get drunk and then hook up. She was always gone the next morning and we wouldn't have to see each other until the next time you or Angela drug us along to something or another."

"If it's that simple then why have you been acting like a zombie all day?" Jordan questioned, trying to wrap his mind around the idea.

"About a year ago I realized that this casual hook up had turned into something a little less casual, at least for me anyway" he scoffed at the memory.

"Wait a minute" Jordan jerked his head towards Shane "You guys were in contact a year ago? Me and Angela weren't even speaking then"

"Yeah, she uh…she called me to tell me about this tour…she thought it might be a good way to get you two talking again and wanted me to see if there was a way that I could get us involved" Shane admitted.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" Jordan questioned.

"She didn't want you guys to think that we were setting you up" he smiled slightly "She's so insanely protective and supportive of Angela…it reminded me of myself…I'd do anything for you, you know that. Anyway, we just sort of started talking…I don't know how it happened, but I started texting her randomly throughout the day. I would find myself waiting to hear from her, and I'd be disappointed every time I'd check my phone and didn't have a message." Jordan smiled understandably at Shane. "I thought that she was feeling it too, but uh…this morning she kind of freaked out on me"

"That's just Rayanne though" Jordan defended "She seriously has commitment issues"

"I'm not asking for commitment" Shane scowled "Honestly, I'm not even sure I want a commitment. I just was hoping that she thought of me as more than just a joke"

"I doubt that's what it is" Jordan didn't know where to go from here. Asking anyone to get inside Rayanne Graff's head was like asking someone to put toothpaste back into the tube once it'd been squeezed out.

"Look man," Shane sighed "It is what it is. She warned me about this when we first started hooking up; I mean I knew what I was getting myself into. I just want to go out tonight and not think about her or this stupid mess I've gotten myself into"

"I think we can do that" Caleb said, storming back into the room dressed in the most ridiculous outfit they'd ever seen.

"Dude" Shane laughed, "I didn't know you were moon lighting as a pimp"

"Where did you get purple pants from man" Jordan laughed, wiping a tear from his eye.

"These gentlemen are a little gift from my wife" he said, throwing pants and shirts at them "she said and I quote, 'If you're going out anywhere without me, at least wear these so that I know no other girls will be hitting on you' but the jokes on her, cause I make this look good!" he said, spinning in a tight circle and posing.

"Yeah the jokes totally on her" Jordan laughed sarcastically.

"Fine, I get you having to dress like this" Shane agreed, holding up the teal button up shirt that Caleb had thrown at him "but why exactly does your wife not want me to get laid?"

"Oh come on," Caleb whined, "if I have to wear this then you guys do too! I can't be the only one that looks like a tool"

"Fine" Shane sighed, "but you're buying the drinks tonight"

"Deal" Caleb quickly agreed.

By 2 o'clock that morning the guys were already incredibly drunk and stumbling out of the second bar they'd been to that night. Jared and Caleb led the way down the strip while Shane was following behind them with a random girl he'd just met minutes earlier dangling off his arm. He was completely uninterested in this girl who had an annoying habit of agreeing with everything he said, but being completely honest he knew that this girl wasn't there to fill any other void then the empty spot in his bed that night.

Caleb stopped dead in his tracks and peered across the street to a karaoke bar that was blaring out an awful version of Katy Perry's California Girls.

"Dude, why are we stopping?" Jared slurred slightly, trying to follow Caleb's gaze.

"I think that's Lindsay" he breathed, rushing across the street with the others in tow.

"What would Lindsay be doing here?" Jordan questioned, dodging a few cars before stepping up on the sidewalk and peering into the window next to Caleb.

"I don't know, but look" he said pointing into the window "it's her and she's killing this song…literally"

Shane laughed at the sight of Lindsay as she drunkenly did a twirl and nearly fell over the microphone stand in front of her. "Let's go cheer her on" he smiled, leaving his 'date' behind and moving towards the entrance.

"Wait" Jordan whispered, looking harder into the window "Caleb no-stop him" Caleb turned to grab Shane but he was already past the bouncer.

"What's the problem man? It's just Lindsay" Caleb asked as they headed towards the doors of the bar.

"Lindsay's not who I'm worried about" Jordan said pushing past the bouncer and running into Shane who had stopped dead in his tracks in the back of the bar. He was staring at the stage with a pained look on his face. "It's who she's here with" Jordan finished, looking towards the stage where a laughing Rayanne and Angela were hugging Lindsay who had just walked back to their table in the front.

1 year ago…

Shane was kicking back and relaxing by the pool, his eyes were closed and his head phones were in. They had been working nonstop on the new album, and this was the first chance he had to just take a break in weeks. He felt his phone vibrate on his chest, and without opening his eyes, he answered it.

"What up?" he said lazily.

"Please tell me I didn't just wake you up" Rayanne replied "it's like 3 o'clock in the afternoon"

"Not that I have to explain myself" Shane sighed "but I've been up for three days straight, and I was just starting to relax. That is until I got this wonderful call from you" he said dryly.

"What's going on?" She questioned sincerely "Jordan cracking the whip a little too hard"

"He's just insanely focused on this new album" Shane replied, rolling over in his lawn chair and resting his head on his hands "I think he's going a little overboard, but at least he's focusing on something other than…well, at least he's keeping his mind busy"

"Angela's the same way" Rayanne sighed "Sometimes I wish she'd just let herself break down, all this avoidance is starting to wear me down"

"At least one good thing has come from this; we haven't been forced to see each other for while" Shane joked.

"Oh Shaney, you wound me" Rayanne fake pouted, "and just when I was starting to think we could really be….friends" she faked sniffed.

"That's where you're wrong doll" Shane played along "We'll never be just friends, not with this big old crush you have on me"

"Please" she laughed "we all know who the crushie is and who the crusher is. Not that I blame you, I'm totally hot"

"And so modest too" he pointed out. Rayanne giggled slightly. "So, what do I owe the pleasure of this call?"

"Well, we just signed on for this new tour next summer" she started "it's going to be three months starting in LA and ending in New York. So far there's 5 bands including us that have signed on, and the promoters are looking to sign about 10 more. All the proceeds are going to be set to go to charities of our choice"

"Sounds awesome" Shane said, sitting up and stretching.

"I was hoping you'd say that" she smiled "cause I was hoping that you'd be interested in signing on too"

"I knew you missed me Graff" Shane teased.

"Be serious" Rayanne pushed on "I think that it's time that Angela and Jordan are forced to deal with this…whatever it is. But you know just as well as I do that forcing either of them into a situation they aren't ready for will cause even bigger problems then we've got now"

"The tour might not be a bad idea" Shane agreed "Our album should be due to release by the beginning of fall, so it would be easy to get Jordan to sign off on it."

"Can I ask you a question?" she said, sounding smaller than Shane had ever heard her before.

"Yeah sure" he said.

"Do you think they have a chance? I mean like, a real chance?"

"If anyone does they do" he replied without thinking.

"I just don't want her to get hurt again…" Rayanne said in almost a whisper.

"I've known Jordan practically my whole life. I've seen him in his best moments and I've seen him in his worst. I've known him to try harder than ever to get what he wants, and I've seen him struggle to keep things. But I've never seen him as completely real and happy then when he's with Angela" he said honestly. "What he did that night, will always haunt him; and I know that if she can ever figure out a way to forgive him that he would never do anything to let her regret it"

"I hope you're right" she sighed "cause I'll kill him if he does it again"

"You wouldn't have to worry your pretty little head about that" he chuckled "I'd kill him for you"

"Awe thanks, Shaney" Rayanne cooed.

"Anything for you doll" he smiled, leaning back against his chair.


	15. Chapter 15

**So I'm getting this one up earlier than I expected because I had a little bit of down time this weekend. So far it's been one of my favorites to write…let me know what you think!**

**Chapter 15.**

_Sometimes the only thing you need is a drink and your best friends…everything else will just work themselves out…_

My eyes began to flutter open, but I quickly shut them again when the shock of the morning sun hit them. Burying myself deep under the covers I moaned from all the movement. From what I could tell, I was in a hotel room, and I knew I was in Vegas; but aside from that I couldn't remember anything else after arriving and heading to the karaoke bar downstairs. I could faintly hear my door open and the shuffle of feet across the carpet.

"Go away, I feel like death" I muttered closing my eyes tightly. I could feel the bed shift, and a hand rub up and down my back.

"Babe, I need you to drink this and then I'll leave you alone" opening my eyes and sliding out of the covers I was met with a smiling Jordan. I smiled widely at him and then winced at the throbbing in my head. He chuckled as he held the glass of water in front of me in one hand and a bottle of aspirin in the other. Taking them both I sat up slowly threw back a few aspirin and drank the glass of water. Jordan took them back and placed them on the side table. Leaning forward, he kissed my forehead and then moved to get off the bed.

"Where are you going?" I pouted, pulling him back to the bed by his hand.

"I thought you wanted to be left alone" he said, arching an eyebrow at me.

"That was when I thought you were Rickie or Rayanne" I smiled, pulling him down and curling up next to his side. He breathed deeply and wrapped his arms securely around me. "What time is it?" I asked closing my eyes.

"After 4 o'clock I think" he answered, rubbing his hands up and down my arm in a lazy pattern.

"Did you just get here?" I yawned.

"You don't remember?" he laughed lightly.

"Remember what?" I asked, opening my eyes and tilting my head up to look at him.

"We ran into you guys early this morning at the bar" he smiled as a look of confusing crossed my face. "I can't believe you don't remember; you were in rare form last night Miss Chase…"

Last night…

"Lindsay…." I whined "You have to sing….we're all singing" I leaned in close to her and loudly whispered "Rayanne is sad, and this will make her haaaaapy" I held out the word.

"I suck at singing" she fake pouted "besides, having to do this with you two is totally embarrassing…this is like your profession"

"I promise that if you're ever sad, we will all design clothes and we'll totally suck at it" Rayanne giggled, taking another drink from one of the random glasses we had at our table.

"Fine…but you guys can never tell anyone about this" she warned, pointing her finger in our faces "If Caleb ever finds out about this, I'll never forgive you" Rayanne and I made x's over our hearts and held our hands up smiling. Lindsay took a shot out of Rickie's hand as he approached the table and downed it before heading in the direction of the stage.

"I take it she's a little nervous" Rickie joked, passing out the rest of our shots.

"This one's so pretty" I smiled, looking at the bright blue shot in my hand "what's in it?" I asked holding it up in front of my nose and recoiling as soon as the smell of the alcohol reached my nose. "Never mind, I'm not sure I want to know what's in here"

"Angela sweetie" Alex smiled, wrapping his arm around my shoulder "Drinks are made for drinking, you never smell them first"

"So what are we drinking to this time?" Rayanne asked, turning so we were all in a circle around the table.

"To Vegas?" Rickie shrugged.

"To blue liquor?" I suggested.

"To the four pillars!" Alex exclaimed raising his shot in front of him, and we all smiled and met our glasses in the center before downing our shots and reaching for our chasers. We cheered when Lindsay came on stage finally and began a version of Katy Perry's _California Girls_. We danced and laughed and for the first time in a very long time I felt like we were all going to be ok.

Lindsay stumbled off the stage and handed the microphone to Rickie "Your turn" she smirked slapping him on the butt as he headed up towards the stage.

I felt a pair of arms circle around my waist and I jumped. Turning a little I let out a squeal and wrapped my arms around Jordan's neck. "My boyfriend!" I exclaimed. I leaned back a little, cupping his face in my hands I kissed him as hard as I could. Pulling away, I kissed him one more time lightly on the lips and whispered hello. "What are you doing here" I asked still staying wrapped up in his embrace.

"We decided to have a guys night and hit the strip" he smiled, tucking my hair behind my ears "what are you doing here?"

"Trying to cheer Raynie up" I said, leaning in closer to whisper in his ear "Don't tell Shane, but it's all his fault"

"Angela!" Rayanne hissed looking at me angerly.

"Don't worry Raynie" I said calmly "I just told Jordan, he won't tell Shane; will you baby?" I cooed, resting my palms on his chest and staring sweetly into his eyes. He smiled at me and shook his head no.

"Tell Shane what?" Shane appeared next to Jordan with his arm around some girl I didn't recognize.

"Who's your little friend" Rayanne smiled even though her eyes were burning with fire.

"This is Amber" Shane smiled and pulled her closer to his side.

"It's Amy" she smiled and held her hand out for Rayanne to shake. Shane shrugged his shoulders and kissed her square on the lips, his eyes never leaving Rayanne's.

"So, Amy" Rayanne interrupted, "How long have you known Shane" she question, gritting her teeth in frustration.

"Oh, only like a couple hours" she replied in one of those annoying baby voices "I was waiting for my friends at this bar, and he asked if I was from outer space" she beamed at Rayanne who had turned her full attention to Shane "It was the most romantic thing anyone's ever said to me"

"I bet it was" Rayanne replied dryly.

"What can I say" Shane said, giving Rayanne an icy stare "some girls really like that romantic stuff"

Rayanne smirked and shook her head "Nice Shane" she grabbed her drink and turned to head away, but stopped and turned at the last minute "Thanks for making my song choice easy for me" she held her beer up in a mock cheers and turned and walked away.

"You're a jerk" I spit, untangling myself from Jordan and following after Rayanne.

I caught up with Rayanne on the side of the stage just as Rickie was getting off. "Who's that girl with Shane?" he asked, handing the microphone off to Rayanne.

"Who cares" she shrugged, "I'm gonna sing then I think it's time we get out of here" she walked on stage and placed the microphone back in the stand, taking a deep breath she sang her song, the meaning not lost on anyone.

Why are you being a dick head for?  
>Stop being a dick head.<br>Why are you being a dick head for?  
>You're just fucking up situations.<p>

Why are you being a dick head for?  
>Stop being a dick head.<br>Why are you being a dick head for?  
>You're just fucking up situations.<p>

Shiny floor, slippery feet,  
>Lights are dim, my eyes can't meet.<br>The reflection that turns my images,  
>Upside down so I can't see.<p>

Think you know everything,  
>You really don't know nothing.<br>I wish that you were more intelligent,  
>So you could see that what you are doing is.<br>So shitty, to me.

Thirty five,  
>People couldn't count.<br>On two hands the amount of times you made me stop,  
>Stop and think why are you being such a dickhead for?<p>

Stop being a dickhead,  
>Why you being a dickhead for?<br>You're just fucking up situations.  
>Why you being a dickhead for?<br>Stop being a dickhead,  
>Why you being a dickhead for?<br>You're just fucking up situations.

Stop, don't show, just have a think before you...  
>Will you, stop, now don't show, just have a think before you...<br>Will you stop, no don't show, just have a think before you...  
>And, stop, don't show, just have a think before you...<p>

Cos my brain and my bones don't want to take, this anymore.  
>My brain and my bones don't want to take, this anymore.<br>My brain and my bones don't want to take, this anymore.  
>My brain and my bones don't want to take, this anymore, so,<p>

Why you being a dickhead for?  
>Stop being a dickhead.<br>Why you being a dickhead for?  
>You're just fucking up situations.<p>

Why you being a dickhead for?  
>Stop being a dickhead.<br>Why you being a dickhead for?  
>You're just fucking up situations<p>

Rayanne sang the whole song staring straight at Shane, and when she was done she walked straight up to him and dropped the microphone in his lap. "Have fun with your new girl" she bit cocking her eyebrow at him and then turning on her heal and heading out of the bar with Rickie and Alex in tow. Shane got up and untangled himself from Amy and headed for the door after her. I stopped him before he got very far.

"I don't think so" I said, pushing him down into a chair and standing in front of him.

"Not now Angela" he snarled, starting to stand up but I put my hand on his shoulder and pushed him back down.

"If you think I'm going to let you get anywhere near her right now, then you are very sadly mistaken" I hissed, bending over so I was staring him in the eye.

"Catalano" Shane warned "If you don't get your girl out of my face…" he started.

"What are you gonna do Shane?" I asked "You gonna hit me? You really think that's gonna make anything better?"

"Angela, baby come on" Jordan reasoned, pulling me away from Shane "Rayanne's a big girl, she can fight this battle on her own. This is just as much her fault as his"

I pulled away from his touch and looked at him like he'd just slapped me. "How could you think that this is her fault? She's just scared and doesn't know how to deal with her feelings; but he" I said pointing at Shane who was still sitting in the chair watching us "he's the one who paraded some whore in front of her. She wasn't trying to hurt him, but that's exactly what he was doing" I started to back away from them, and I could feel the tears begin to form in my eyes.

"Don't do this" Jordan said, reaching forward and pulling me back to him. I struggled in his arms, not wanting to touch him in that moment, but he was stronger than me and the alcohol was really affecting my strength. "Baby look at me" I tried to fight the urge to look at him, but I was so scared that this would lead to some big fight that would leave us not talking again so I looked at him, my chin trembling as I attempted to keep the tears in. "I love you, and this doesn't have anything to do with you or me. All I'm saying, is that this is something that is going on between Shane and Rayanne, and nothing that you or I do can stop it. They are both equal parts in this."

"I love you too" I whispered as a tear fell down my cheek "but she's my best friend and I don't know how to stand by and not try and protect her" Jordan kissed my forehead and tightened his grip around me. Shane stood up stared at his feet.

"I wasn't trying to hurt her" he said softly, looking up and meeting my eye "I was trying to get her out of my mind" I thought I could see the glimmer of a tear in his eye, but before I had the chance to see for sure, he'd turned and walked sadly out of the bar.

Present day…

Rayanne was frantically moving around the room trying desperately to gather all her belongings and get out of there without waking up the sleeping form in the bed. Finally finding her shirt, she slipped it over her head, hitting her hand on the side of the dresser as she brought it down. Freezing in her spot she looked to the bed, watching with her breath held as the man in the bed stirred. She didn't let out the breath she'd been holding until she saw that he hadn't woken up. Grabbing her bag last, she slowly opened the door and backed out; taking one last look towards the bed she bit her lip and thought about going back.

It could be simple, she thought, to just crawl back into bed and deal with everything that that action would mean. But the fear of actually doing that, of actually having to put a definition out there was enough to make her flee. Closing her eyes, she shut the door and headed down the hallway as fast as she could move, not stopping until she reached the elevator. Once the doors closed, a tear fell down her face, and then another and another until the tears started fall so fast that she was unsure where one tear started and the other one ended.

The ding of the elevator snapped her out of it, as she quickly wiped at the tears on her face and threw on a pair of sunglasses she had in her bag. She was looking towards the ground when the doors finally opened.

"Raynie!" Rickie smiled, stepping into the elevator with Alex "Where have you been? We've been looking for you all morning"

"Oh, you know" she said, stumbling about and trying desperately to come up with an excuse "I've been here and there…" she bit at the side of her thumb and hoped that Rickie wouldn't push it any farther.

"Please, you're boring us with the details" Alex sarcastically smirked, throwing his arm around her shoulders and kissing the top of her head "Want to grab some breakfast with us?"

She smiled softly up at him and nodded her head. Rickie and Alex continued on talking, and Rayanne was glad she had the sunglasses on so they couldn't tell that her eyes had begun to glaze over as her mind drifted off to the events that had gone down in the elevator just hours prior.

Earlier that morning…

Rayanne had ditched Rickie and Alex about an hour ago and found a little dive bar to finish out her drinking. She was mad; mad at Shane for throwing that skank in her face, mad at herself for getting upset at the sight of him with that skank, and mad that he hadn't followed her when she left the bar. Honestly, as soon as they reached the sidewalk right outside of the doors she'd paused, hoping that he'd be right there behind her, but they waited minutes for a cab and he never came. All she wanted was for him to prove that he wasn't just another guy and to actually fight for her; but he never came.

Throwing back another drink she paid her tab and headed back to the hotel. For the first time in her life she was unsure of where she was headed. She'd always been responsible for herself, never depending on anyone other than Rickie and Angela. She liked knowing that her heart was locked safely away, and that no one had ever tried to get to it. That was until Shane showed up in her life.

He was so frustrating! They very rarely agreed on anything, but they were exactly the same. He got under her skin, but she felt at peace whenever he was in the room with her. No one had ever made her feel as special as he did whenever he looked at her, and she spent all her time away from him wishing he'd show up. That alone made her more scared than she'd ever been. If she was feeling this way about him now when they were just a casual fling, how would she feel if they ever took it to the next step; and even more scary, how would she feel when it all came to an end?

Stepping into the hotel she suddenly felt very tired, and wanted nothing more than to fall into her bed and hide away from the world for a little while. Reaching for the button for the elevator she recoiled her hand when she came in contact with another person's hand. "Sorry" she smiled, looking over to see a shocked Shane removing his hand as well. "Sorry" he smiled softly back. Rayanne quickly looked back towards the doors, her breathing picking up as she bit at the inside of her cheek. Once the doors opened she walked inside followed by a reluctant Shane.

"What floor?" he asked softly, biting at the side of his thumb and looking at her from the corner of his eye.

"10" She spoke quickly. Shane pushed the button and then stepped back into place next to her. The silence was deafening and the tension radiating off the two of them was thick. "So that was quick" she bit casually at him.

"What was quick" he asked, raising his eyebrows at her.

"You're little romp with Amy" she replied icily.

"First off" he said turning and facing her with fire in his eyes "my 'romps' are none of your concern; and second, you should know better than anyone that they are far from short" he bit out, turning his attention back to the numbers that were slowly ticking away.

"First off" Rayanne fired back "they became my concern the moment that you tried to rearrange our little arrangement; second…I wouldn't be too confident on the length or lack thereof of your romps". Rayanne had to admit to herself that that was merely to get him angry, cause if there was one thing she was sure of it was that Shane Lewis knew exactly what he was doing in that department and it was never lacking in length.

Calling her bluff Shane turned, backing Rayanne slowly into the corner. "You never complained before…" he started, placing his hands on either side of her trapping her against the wall.

"I was just being nice" she teased, cocking an eyebrow at him her breathing quickly picking up pace.

"You don't know how to be nice" he growled, dipping his head down and sucking on her neck. Rayanne arched her body into his, running her hands up his torso and tangling her fingers in his hair. He placed his hands securely on her waist, lifting her up and pinning her back against the wall as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He moved his attention from her neck to her ear, as she began to grind her hips against his. He groaned into her ear and she giggled.

"I can be nice when I want to be" she purred, as he pulled his head back and looked her in the eye. He brushed some hair from her face and licked his lips.

The bell for his floor rang out, and he pulled her out of the elevator and towards his room. They didn't separate for the rest of the night.

Present day…

The sound of the elevator reaching the bottom floor sprung Rayanne out of her thoughts. Rickie and Alex laughed at the conversation they were having as they headed towards the front of the hotel. Rayanne stopped just outside of the elevator and looked at the button. All she'd have to do is push it, and head back up stairs. It would be that simple, and everything would work itself out. But she just couldn't make herself do it.


	16. Chapter 16

**Sorry for not updating sooner, I've just been super busy. I hope you like this new chapter and the cuts between the points of view are ok. Things are going to move forward for Shane and Rayanne soon, but it won't be super easy for them, please stick it out and see where it goes. Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter and I'll try my best to update sooner this time. **

**Chapter 16.**

_There are few things in life more confusing than the way a girl acts…I've never been able to understand or been able to guess what they're thinking…and things only got more confusing the more I got to know Angela and Rayanne…_

Present day…

Jordan walked into his hotel suite with a smile on his face, only for that to vanish as soon as he saw Shane slumped down on the couch mindlessly flipping through the channels on the TV. Dropping his key on the side table, he cautiously walked over and sat on the opposite side of the couch. He watched a few minutes of TV with him before deciding to speak up. Clearing his throat he kept his eyes glued to the screen. "So, last night was pretty insane huh?" he asked casually.

Shane looked up from the TV for a second before answering "Yeah, I uh…I don't really remember much of it past the first bar where we met that chick" he said, turning his attention back to the TV before settling on an old rerun.

"You don't remember anything?" Jordan questioned, finding it hard to believe. In the entire time that he knew Shane he'd never known him to black out when he drank.

"I mean, parts of it are kind of fuzzy" he admitted "and I had this totally hot dream, but for the most part it's all pretty black" he admitted.

"Hot dream huh?" Jordan smiled, looking towards his friend with expectant eyes.

"Yep" he grinned "I had this dream that I had sex that started in the elevator and finished in the shower" he smiled at his memory.

"Not bad, with anyone I know?" Jordan probed on.

"Nah," Shane shrugged, "just some hot girl" he sighed, getting up from the couch and heading for the door "I'm gonna head out for a little bit, maybe catch a show or something. What time do I need to be back for sound check?"

"6" Jordan answered, standing up and looking towards Shane "You sure you don't want any company?" he asked.

"No I think I'm just wanting some alone time" he smiled, heading out the door before Jordan could protest anymore.

Once outside, Shane turned to head towards the elevator but stopped a few feet from it. He chuckled at the memory that was flooding his mind, but his smile quickly disappeared and he turned, deciding to take the stairs instead.

Last night had been amazing, but he knew better then to think that anything was going to change. She was so frustrating! He couldn't understand how impossible she was being about this whole thing. It's not like he was trying to marry her or anything, he just wanted to spend time with her. He thought that he'd be able to just find some random girl to fill the void and get his mind off of her, but if last night proved anything it was that just any random girl wasn't going to be able to come anywhere close to her.

He was about five floors from the bottom before he heard anything, but the closer her got the clearer it became. It was a good melody, a little shaky but you could tell it had a solid foundation. He stopped dead in his tracks when he heard Rayanne's voice begin to sing along with the melody.

So this is how the story went  
>I met someone by accident<br>who blew me away  
>who blew me away<p>

It was in the darkest of my days  
>When you took my sorrow and you took my pain<br>And buried them away, you buried them away

And I wish I could lay down beside you  
>When the day is done<br>And wake up to your face against the morning sun  
>But like everything I've ever known<br>you'll disappear one day  
>So I'll spend my whole life hiding my heart away<br>And I can't spend my whole life hiding my heart  
>away<p>

I woke up feeling heavy hearted  
>I'm going back to where I started<br>The morning rain  
>The morning rain<br>And you know I wish that you were here  
>But that same old road that brought me here<br>Is calling me home  
>Is calling me home<p>

And I wish I could lay down beside you  
>When the day is done<br>And wake up to your face against the morning sun  
>But like everything I've ever known<br>You'll disappear someday  
>So I'll spend my whole life hiding my heart away<br>And I can't spend my whole life hiding my heart  
>away<p>

Shane sat down on the stairs where he was and listened to the song she was singing. He couldn't decide if he should say something, or if he should leave and never mention it. It was about him, right? He had been struggling with Rayanne for so long, it just seemed impossible that he could have stumbled into this answer. He sat there, listening to her strum on her guitar and for the first time he felt like there could be hope. Hearing the door open, he moved slowly up a few stairs to make sure he wasn't seen.

"There you are" a voice he assumed to be Alex's spoke as the door shut behind him, "what are you doing in here?"

"Hiding out" Rayanne sighed no longer playing that melody.

"What are you hiding from" Alex questioned.

"The real world" Rayanne smiled taking a breath she continued on "Angela is in our room, and I know she's gonna want to talk about last night, and I just don't know what to tell her"

"What happened last night?" Alex asked softly.

"I bailed again" she admitted shamefully.

"Raynie" Alex sighed.

"I know ok" she said defensively "I didn't want to…but I woke up and he was just there, and I let myself curl up next to him, you know, just too see what it would feel like…" a tear fell down her cheek and she smiled wistfully "and it felt real good…but then he shifted and put his arm around me, and I just panicked, and before I knew what was happening I was rushing around the room and then I was in the elevator."

"What is it about Shane that scares you so much" Shane's ears perked up at the mention of his name and he drew in a breath as he waited for her answer.

"What happens if I hurt him?" she looked at Alex for a moment before continuing on "He deserves someone better than me, someone who was meant to be in a relationship; I can't give him that"

"Then why do you keep sleeping with him?" Alex questioned.

"I-" Rayanne started but was cut off by the sound of the door opening again.

"Guys come on" Angela rushed in "we're so late" a minute later they were gone and Shane began walking down the stairs again. He didn't know what to think about what he'd just heard. How was it possible that that's what she thought? Reaching the bottom stair he stopped and sat down again. He felt lost and unsure about what he should do next. This was completely foreign for him, usually it was Jordan who was all caught up in these love messes, and he didn't have the foggiest idea of where to go from here. Looking down he saw a folded up stack of papers, picking them up he started to read them. The first page was the lyrics to that song he'd heard Rayanne singing just minutes before. The next few pages were random bits of lyrics, ideas for songs he assumed. But it was the last page that caught his attention the most. It was a magazine article from a few months back. He'd almost completely forgotten that he'd done that interview, it was a last minute fill in he did for Jordan when he accidentally double booked.

He heard Angela's voice on the other side of the door and he tried to fold the papers up again so he could get back up the stairs before she saw him, but the door opened faster than he expected and he was caught red handed. Angela's eyes grew wide as she hurried in and shut the door behind her.

"What are you doing?" She loudly whispered, rushing over and snatching the papers from his hand.

"I didn't know what it was at first" Shane defended, standing up and walking up a few stairs "I promise I wasn't trying to snoop, I just found it and opened it up to figure out what it was"

"She never finds out that you read these, you understand?" Angela demanded. She sighed and then softened her tone "She really is fragile Shane, and if I thought for one second that you were just stringing her along"

"I'm not" he interrupted honestly. "I don't know what I'm doing honestly, but I'm not playing games here"

"Good" she replied "so what are you planning on doing?"

"I have no idea, each time I think that we start to take a step forward I wake up to see that we've taken two steps back" he answered, leaning against the wall.

"How about you come by tonight after your set" Angela smiled at him and headed for the door.

"Why?" he asked, pushing off of the wall and looking at her.

"Trust me" she smiled coyly "I have an idea" and with that she was out the door before Shane could question her anymore. She nearly ran over Rayanne once she was out the door; steadying herself she grabbed her by the arm and headed as far away from the door as she could.

"Hey, did you find my notes?" Rayanne questioned with a worried look on her face.

"Yeah" Angela said handing them over to Rayanne, "they were still sitting on the steps where you left them"

"Oh thank God," she breathed, stuffing them into her bag "I would have died if anyone found these"

"So I was thinking about having everyone over to the suite tonight," Angela started "we can have dinner and a little wine, watch a movie…just hang out"

"Sounds great" Rayanne agreed nonchalantly humming that same melody she'd been singing as she dug through her bag looking for some gum. Giving up, she looped her arm through Angela's and sighed.

"What's the matter?" Angela asked letting Rayanne rest her head on her shoulder as they walked.

"Sometimes I just feel like everything in my life is out of control" she sighed, "I just wish we could go back in time, when everything was simpler"

"What time do you want to go back to?" Angela asked smiling.

"Do you remember the first time we went to London?" she looked towards Angela, straightening up and unhooking her arm "I was really happy there"

"What makes then different than now?" Angela asked, furrowing her brow.

"I felt so free then you know" Rayanne smiled a small smile "I didn't have anything keeping me confined, and…I hope this doesn't come out wrong…but I was so wrapped up in keeping your mind off of the whole Jordan mess that I didn't have time to think about the mess that my life has turned into."

"Well, then let me return the favor" Angela smiled, opening the door to the rehearsal space and letting Rayanne enter first "How about for a while, you let me worry about keeping your mind off of the drama"

"Angel-food" Rayanne smiled, "I wish that it were that simple. Besides, you finally have things working to your advantage, I want you and Jordan to spend time happily wrapped up in each other, I don't want to be a distraction"

"You're not a distraction," Angela insisted "Besides we all know that this elephant in the room isn't going to stay silent forever. If you have any hope at all of figuring out what's going on with you and Shane, then it's about time we start to deal with it together; and I think I have an idea for that" She smiled coyly and grabbed her guitar off the stand.

"What are you thinking?" Rayanne asked cautiously, toying with the microphone in front of her, avoiding looking at Angela.

"The problem is that neither of you are very good at the follow through; you never stick it out past the morning and he never lets you know what's going on in his mind" Angela stated simply "I think that by being in the same room together, with all of us there acting as a buffer, then maybe you guys can make past whatever is holding you back and break down that barrier."

"And what if that doesn't change anything?" Rayanne questioned, looking up from the microphone in front of her.

"Then you're in no worse shape than you are now" Angela replied like it was the easiest thing in the world.

"What do I do?" Rayanne asked, completely unsure of what was supposed to happen next.

"Try being nice to him for starters" Angela answered "Try talking to him instead of yelling or calling him names. I'm not saying that tonight is going to fix anything, but I think it's worth a try"

"It's just that easy?" Rayanne sighed. Angela smiled and nodded continuing to tune her guitar. Rayanne turned and focused her attention back on the set list in front of her. Maybe it could be that simple, she thought scribbling down some adjustments on the list; she could be nice to him if she tried.

That night…

Rayanne had been hiding out in the kitchen for the last 30 minutes. Things hadn't been that bad really, everyone was having a great time watching movies and hanging out; but it was all still kind of awkward. She had found it almost easy to have a normal conversation with Shane, but she wasn't sure if that was because everyone else was there so they didn't bring up the issues that they were having. She was mindlessly stirring some dip with her back to the kitchen door, letting her mind drift off into space when someone cleared their throat snapping her out of her day dream. When she turned she noticed Shane leaning against the door frame with his hands shoved in his pockets.

"Hey" he smiled nervously, pushing off the door frame and moving cautiously towards the counter in the center of the kitchen.

"Hey" Rayanne grinned, putting the bowl and the counter and stabbing lightly at it with the spoon "I was just making some onion dip" she explained, even though he hadn't asked.

"Need some help" he asked, moving around the counter and standing next to her. She stiffened and angled herself away from him.

"Umm..." she stumbled, swallowing the large lump that was forming in her throat "sure, thanks" she smiled, handing him the spoon playing with the towel on the counter. Shane chuckled a little and began stirring the dip. "What?" she smiled questioningly at him.

"It's just funny to watch you get so uncomfortable every time I try and do something nice" he chuckled, dipping his finger into the bowl and tasting the dip.

"I do not" Rayanne blushed pushing playfully at Shane.

"Yeah you do" he smiled, turning so he was facing her "If I come within a foot of you, your whole body sort of tenses up and you get all fidgety" he teased, moving a little closer in an attempt to prove his point. As if on cue Rayanne backed up a little and turned her gaze to the towel on the counter, moving it closer to her, only to drop it when she noticed that she was doing exactly what he said she did.

"Ok," she admitted, "You make me a little nervous" she said in a small voice.

"Why?" he asked, reaching up and brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Because of that" she breathed, closing her eyes and sighing a little "The whole time I've known you it's been this perfect arrangement, you know" opening her eyes she looked into his eyes "but lately it's been moving into this relationship zone and it kind of scares me cause I've never been that kind of girl"

"I get that, I do" Shane replied honestly "but how do you know that you're not that kind of girl if you've never even given it a chance to work"

"Ok" Rayanne countered "let's just say that we tried that…a relationship I mean…what happens? Does that mean I have to start checking in with you about things? Would I have to stop hanging out with everyone all the time cause we'd being forced to hang out instead? Would that change things between us, cause let's be honest…what we do have going for us is really, really hot sex, but will being in a relationship destroy that? And what happens if it doesn't work out and we break up? And" Shane crashed his lips against Rayanne's in an attempt to shut her up for a second. She responded, arching her body against his. Pulling away, he rested his hands on her hips and smiled.

"You have too many questions" he smiled "I don't have answers for any of them honestly and I don't think that we should have them yet anyway. You and I, we're different from everyone else, so why would we have to follow everyone else's rules? I just want to know that if we spend the night together, I won't wake up to see the smoke from your bailing so fast."

"I'm sorry about that" she bit her lip, toying with one of the buttons on Shane's shirt "I just get a little…relationship-claustrophobic sometimes"

"We don't have to define anything right now" he smiled, dipping down a little and making her look at him "Let's just play it by ear and see what happens, ok?" she smiled and nodded her head, leaning up and kissing him softly. A knock on the door interrupted the moment and she sighed pushing him away from her and smiling, she handed him the bowl of dip and headed towards the front door. The smile quickly faded once she opened the door and saw the man waiting on the other side.

"Hello angel" he greeted.

"What are you doing here?" Rayanne asked, her breathing picking up pace.

"Do I need a reason to stop by and see my wife?" he asked, moving around her and into the hotel room.


	17. Chapter 17

**Sorry for the delay on getting this chapter up, I've just been terribly busy lately. I'm glad to see that you guys are still reading this. This chapter is a little sad, but things will get better I promise. I'm thinking of moving through time a little faster in the next chapter, but I'm not sure how I want to do that yet. I don't want to rush through anything just for the sake of getting to the next parts, especially because I don't want to make it feel fake for either Shane or Rayanne. I hope that you guys are ok with the focus being on them for a little while, I'm really enjoying writing for both of their characters. Please let me know what you think! I promise to try and have the next chapter up sooner!**

**Chapter 17.**

_We all do things that at the time don't seem to be a mistake…and then time passes and we realize that it was…a mistake I mean. Sometimes it's small; most times it's huge….this was one of those big…big…mistakes…_

"Please tell me you're joking" I laughed throwing some popcorn at Jordan who was sitting on the other end of the couch from me. He dodged the popcorn and smiled widely, running his hands over my legs that were resting in his lap.

"I'm serious" he laughed along "when I was little I thought that one day I would grow up to be Luke Skywalker" he said, pointing to the TV that was playing the original Star Wars.

"I don't know what's more embarrassing; the fact that you really believed that or that you'd rather be Luke than Han" I teased. Jordan cocked his eyebrow at me. "What? Han was way better than Luke and I dare you to prove me wrong"

"You are so hot right now" he moaned, placing my legs on either side of his body and crawling over to my side of the couch. Cupping his face in my hands, I pulled him closer while leaning back and positioning myself under his body.

Jordan laced his fingers with mine and kissed me deeply. There was something magical in that moment; it was like we were suddenly transported back to a time before all the drama and all the hurt. It felt perfect and I knew that Jordan felt the same. Our bodies moved skillfully and effortlessly along each other; it was like we were meant for this…born for moments just like this. His hands slid down my body and slowly and softly dipped under my shirt, caressing my skin and leaving a trail of goose bumps wherever they went. Sliding my hands slowly down his back I felt his muscles tense and contract under my touch; arching my back I groaned when I felt him press against me. I reached my hand down in between us and he took in a sharp breath when my hand came in contact with the front of his pants.

"Seriously guys!" Shane exclaimed walking into the room with a bowl of dip and sitting down on the couch across from ours "I know that you're trying to make up for lost time or whatever, but could you at least wait until we're not here. This is like the second time in two days that someone's walked in on you".

Jordan pulled away and scowled at Shane, pulling me up with him and placing me in between his legs. I leaned my back against his chest and looked at Shane, unable to wipe the grin from my face that came naturally from just being in Jordan's presence. I felt him kiss the top of my head as he wrapped his arms around me. "I would say sorry Shane but I'm not" I smiled "maybe you should start knocking before you come into a room" I teased causing Jordan to chuckle behind me.

"I know your joking, but considering the fact that you two are acting like a couple of horny teenagers that might not be such a bad idea" Shane joked, shoving a chip loaded with dip into his mouth.

"Sorry dad" Jordan teased.

"So, you were in there for a little bit, did you and Rayanne finally talk?" I asked reaching over and grabbing the popcorn off the table and throwing some in my mouth.

"Yeah" he shrugged a little embarrassed "I mean, it wasn't like a real intense conversation or anything, but I at least got her to tell me what it is that's been getting her all spooked. That's something right?" he asked looking to me for confirmation.

"So what happens now?" Jordan asked, reaching over my shoulder and grabbing some popcorn as well.

"I'm not sure really, I think we just have to see if we can actually make it through the night and into tomorrow before we can move forward" he answered.

"Where is she?" I asked, noticing for the first time that she wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Someone was at the door so she went to answer it" he replied looking over his shoulder towards the front door. He did a double take when he saw a familiar looking person standing in the hallway with Rayanne. I leaned forward so I could see what he was looking at and my mouth dropped open in surprise.

"Who's here?" Jordan asked craning his neck around me to see who was at the door "he looks familiar, where do I know him from?"

I didn't know what to say; I felt like if I told them who he was then it would ruin everything, but if I didn't warn Shane as to who he was then that would ruin things too. So I just sat there, waiting for the answer to just come to me hoping that whatever was about to happen wouldn't take this night on a turn for the worse.

"What's everyone looking at?" Rickie asked, coming out of the bedroom with Alex in tow. Glancing down the hallway he quickly looked back at me, and I nodded in confirmation. "This is going to be weird" mouthed, pulling Alex down in one of the chairs with him.

Rayanne came into the room and stood awkwardly for a moment, looking sadly at the seat next to Shane before shifting uncomfortably and looking at me. I gave her a half smile and stood up, pulling a confused Jordan up with me. "Let's go back to your room" I whispered looking towards Rayanne and Shane so he'd get the hint that I thought we should leave them alone. Jordan nodded in agreement and followed me out of the room.

…

After Rickie and Alex left the room Rayanne made her way to the couch, sitting as far away from Shane as she could. Her back was straight her eyes were glued to her hands that were fidgeting nervously in her lap. Shane could sense her tension, but didn't know whether or not he should talk first or wait for her to start. After a few minutes, he cleared his throat and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "I'm going to guess that I'm not going to be too excited to find out who that guy was huh?" he asked hoping that he was wrong about this whole situation.

"Probably not" Rayanne confirmed in a small voice. She bit her lip and continued on without looking up "His name is Mikel, we've been friends for a long time…his band was trying to get started the same time that we were and we'd spend a lot time together at all these little dive bars all over the place." She looked over to Shane, wondering if she should continue on. He was just staring at her, and she couldn't help but feel like this was going to be the last time he looked at her before everything changed. Taking a breath she looked back to her hands before closing her eyes and continuing on. "We got really drunk one night and before anyone could stop us…we found this little wedding chapel and got married." Rayanne could see Shane stiffen at her words.

"Go on" he bit out after a few moments when Rayanne had stopped talking.

"It's not like it meant anything to either of us" Rayanne softly said, a tear falling from her eye "and we were going to get it annulled, but somehow his mom found out about it…and she's very like old world about this sort of thing and he asked me if we could just stay married for a while and then later down the line pretend that things just didn't work out so that she wouldn't be upset with him"

"Is that why he's here then? So that you guys can get it all taken care of?" Shane asked, biting on the side of his thumb.

"Sort of" Rayanne mumbled "His band is here for the tour as well I guess, and um…well, he just needs me to help him out for a few months and then we'll have this public breakup or whatever so that he mom can see us…"

"What do you mean, 'help him out'" Shane questioned, finally turning his face in her direction.

"He just wants us to get photographed together, and do a couple joint songs that they've been working on…nothing big"

"Nothing big?" Shane yelled "First you tell me you're married, then you tell me that this guy is not only still wanting to stay married, but he's going to be here on this tour and he wants to be seen out with you…which let's be honest is a laugh because you lost your mind the only time I ever tried to even touch you in public. And now he wants you to sing some romantic duets so that his mommy doesn't get mad at him" Shane was pacing in front of the couch now, waving his hands as he spoke causing Rayanne to flinch at the anger in his voice.

"It's not like that" Rayanne stood, trying to get him to stand still "It's not like he's asking me to really be married to him he just needs me to help him out. It'll be just a month or two and then it's over. This doesn't have to stop anything that is going on with us" she tried to reason.

"You're kidding right" Shane growled, turning on Rayanne, her breath catching in her throat at the sight of the fire in his eyes. "I don't mess with married women" he stormed towards the door slamming it behind him.

Shane stormed down the hall towards the elevator and he pressed the button and turned to face the wall beside him. Without thinking he punched the wall as hard as he could leaving a hole where his now bloody hand had connected. Stepping into the empty elevator he pushed the button for his floor and waited for the door to close. His jaw clenched tight when he saw Rayanne rush out of her room and stop when she saw the wall. They stared at each other until the doors closed and he felt the elevator jerk him up towards his floor.

The voice in his head was telling him to go back and fix it, to fight for her, but he was so mad and felt like such a fool that he just pushed that thought to the back of his mind and tried to think about anything else besides the throbbing in his hand and the look on Rayanne's face right before the doors closed.

…

I was trying to explain everything to Jordan when Shane stormed into the suite and headed straight for the kitchen. I jumped up from my seat and rushed to the kitchen only to find him downing a beer and running his hand under the facet. He flinched when I reached for his hand at first and then let me examine his hand after he realized that I wasn't going to stop.

"I take it things didn't go to well?" I questioned dryly, pulling his hand out from under the water and motioning for him to sit at the stool that was sitting by the counter.

"I don't want to talk about it" he mumbled, looking anywhere but at me. Grabbing some ice from the freezer I wrapped one of the towels around the cubes and handed it to Shane. Jordan came into the room with the first aid kit and leaned on the counter on the opposite side of Shane and me.

"I guess I need to call the front desk and let them know you decided to do some demo work on one of their walls" Jordan attempted to joke.

"Nah, we'll just hang a picture over it and they'll never know" he smiled small at Jordan.

"Just like old times" he smiled back. I finished cleaning out Shane's cut and wrapped it up.

"I'm going to go check on Rayanne" I said, moving over to Jordan and kissing him lightly on the lips, "try not to punch anything else tonight, you'd be a pretty said drummer with two bad hands" I smiled lightly and made my way out of the suite and towards the elevator. How did everything go so bad so fast? I couldn't help but wonder if we would ever all be happy at the same time. I suddenly felt like we were living in some sort of cruel soap opera. I chuckled at that idea as the doors to the elevator opened and I quickly wiped the smile from my face when I saw Rayanne. She was sitting on the ground with her back pressed against the wall, staring at the whole in the wall. I silently sat down next to her and wrapped my arm around her shoulder. Leaning her head against me I felt her begin to tremble under my embrace.

"It's gonna be ok" I soothed, even though I wasn't sure if I believed that or not.

"No it's not" she whispered "I ruined everything"

"What's going on with Mikel?" I asked guessing that he wasn't here just to catch up. He was always such a bad influence on Rayanne, and I knew that Shane's anger had less to do with the fact that Rayanne had drunkenly got married and more to do with whatever bad scheme it was that Mikel was dragging her into this time.

"He wants me to play along with this thing for the next month or two and then he promised that we'd end the marriage for real this time" she answered "I told him that I was sort of seeing someone and that I didn't think I could play along, but he said that things with his mom had turned bad again, and he just wanted her to see him in a relationship before she passed. I couldn't say no to him, not after all those times he helped me out of trouble."

"What did Shane say when you told him that?" I pushed.

"I didn't get the chance to explain it fully to him" she sighed "he was just so mad, and it all got out of hand too fast. It's over before we even had the chance to see if it could work or not" she cried.

"I think he's just in shock about this whole situation" I tried to defend him "let's just go back to the room and see how things are in the morning" I suggested, standing up and offering my hand to Rayanne. She shook her head no.

"I think I'm just going to sit here for a little bit longer" she said, drawing her knees up to her chest and resting her head on her knees.

I leaned down and kissed her lightly on the head and then headed into our room.

**The Next Day…**

We were sitting at a table in the hotel's restaurant with Rickie and Alex the next morning waiting on our breakfast. Rayanne was unusually quiet and distant, picking mindlessly at one of the sugar packets in front of her.

"So," Rickie awkwardly spoke "you guys go on at 12:00 and then I have you set up to do an interview with one of the stations at 1:30; after that we can hang out and catch some shows or we can head out to the next city. What do you think?"

"I was hoping to stay and catch Jordan's show tonight if that's ok?" I asked looking around the table to see what everyone else thought. My eyes stayed on Rayanne to see what she wanted.

"I don't care, just let me know when to be back on the bus…I have to have dinner with Mikel tonight" she sighed, dropping the sugar packet and resting her head on her hand.

"You really think it's a good idea to keep up with this?" Alex asked cautiously.

"Of course it's not" she bit before softening her tone "I don't think I have much choice in the matter though-" her bodied stiffened and she sat up straighter looking over my shoulder towards the elevators. I turned to see Jordan and Shane step out both of them smiling at some joke that Caleb had made I guessed from the look of things. They headed in our direction, but when Shane saw us he froze in his spot. Looking at Rayanne, he swallowed the lump in his throat and said something to Jordan before turning around and heading out of the hotel. A moment later Caleb followed, and then Jordan smiled apologetically at me before following his two friends outside. I turned and looked to Rayanne who had the saddest expression I'd ever seen her have.

"I'm not hungry any more" she sighed, standing up from the table and pushing her chair in "I'm just gonna head back up to the room for a while. I'll meet you guys backstage for sound check".

"How do we fix this?" Alex asked once Rayanne was out of ear shot.

"I don't think we can" I admitted, watching her get into the elevator and disappear.


	18. Chapter 18

**So I'm getting this chapter up sooner than the last one, hope you guys like it. I know it kind of ends in an awkward place, but the next part needed to go with the next chapter, so I had to end it somewhere. Please let me know what you think, or what you'd like to see or not see. I promise I really do love getting your feedback and I want to make sure that you are getting what you want. I'd love to see what you want and see if I can find a way to make it work into my story line. Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter….hope you like it….**

**Chapter 18.**

_It's like how time heals wounds, but there are scars everywhere…_

Rayanne was lying on her back in the middle of the bed staring at the ceiling fan as it spun round and round. She had been holding in the tears for the last 45 minutes, but she knew it was just a matter of time before they spilt. She knew that it was going to sting, but she wasn't prepared for Shane to completely avoid her. The thing that surprised her more than anything was the how much she already missed having him around. She wanted to text him, she wanted to see him…hell, she'd be fine with fighting with him…she was just afraid that last night was the final nail in the coffin and there would be no coming back from it.

Hearing a knock on the door, she blinked causing a tear to escape down her cheek. Sitting up, she wiped at her eyes and scooted to the edge of the bed. Sighing, she slowly stood up and made her way to the door. She opened the door and frowned at Mikel who was waiting on the other side.

"What's with the sour expression angel?" he asked stepping into the room while Rayanne shut the door behind him.

"I'm not in the mood Mikel" she mumbled, pushing past him and heading into the kitchen.

"Trouble in paradise?" he teased following closely behind her.

"That's not funny" she sighed, pouring a glass of water "and it's not really any of your business anyway"

"Look Raynie" he started "I know that my timing is horrible, but I really do appreciate you going along with this". She quickly grinned at him before putting her glass of water back in the sink. Turning and resting her back against the sink she folded her arms in front of her chest and sighed.

"I have to head out to our show, want to come along?" she asked.

"Sure" he grinned, putting his hand in his pocket and pulling out a tiny silver band "ready to be my wife?" he asked holding it out to her. She swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat and took the ring out of his hand. Slipping it on her finger a small tear fall down her cheek, understanding exactly just how much pain this one little ring was going to cause Shane.

They left the room and made their way to the elevator. Riding down in complete silence Rayanne nervously twisted the ring on her finger. It felt foreign and wrong, like the weight of it was throwing off the balance on her hand. She was trying to think of a way to explain it once people noticed, but it all seemed fake and forced. She wasn't sure how this was going to work, and honestly part of her was hoping it would fall apart so that she could forget about it and try to salvage anything that may have remained between her and Shane. She was still looking at the ring on her finger when the doors opened and there stood Shane. She dropped her hand quickly, hoping that he didn't see it. Mikel stepped around Shane and held his hand out for Rayanne to take. Looking from his hand to Shane's eyes, she reluctantly placed her small hand into his.

"Congrats on the wedding man" Shane tightly choked out his eyes burning through Rayanne.

"Thanks" Mikel smiled, not realizing who he was, pulling Rayanne behind him and into the crowd.

**One Week Later…**

"Her face is fucking everywhere" Shane growled as he and Jordan walked past a news stand in Chicago.

"Don't let those stupid gossip magazines get in your head man" Jordan replied taking a bit out of the pretzels he had in his hands.

"How can you even say that to me?" Shane said, grabbing some pretzels and munching on them "You of all people know how easily these pictures can mess with your mind"

"Exactly" Jordan argued back "And remember how great that turned out for me? All I'm saying is that at least this time you know that all these pictures are complete fabrications"

"I don't care, it's still annoying" Shane mumbled "and he's a complete tool" Shane added as they reached their bus and climbed inside.

"Yeah, Angela's not too fond of him either" Jordan agreed following Shane onto the bus and plopping down on the bench seat.

Turning on the small TV they were met with images of Rayanne and Mikel walking the streets of Chicago arm in arm. _"Sources close to the couple say they've been off and on for the last few years and recently reconnected weeks ago during preparations for the Bands with Causes tour. The duo seen here shopping in Chicago are said to be working on a collaboration that they will debut at one of the shows on the tour…" _Jordan turned the TV off and looked guiltily at Shane who was angrily chopping at the food he was preparing.

"Like I said, her face…is…fucking…everywhere" he said chopping in between each word.

"Are you ever gonna talk to her again?" Jordan asked, pretending to be paying attention to the guitar that he'd picked up and was strumming absent mindedly at.

"I don't know" Shane shrugged "there doesn't seem to be much point to it anymore…it's not like we can just pretend all of this didn't happen. Besides, it was like pulling teeth just to get to where we were anyway…it shouldn't be that much work you know"

"They don't write songs about the ones that come easy" Jordan said, smirking up at Shane as he started to play the chords to the song Shane had played for him a little over a week ago.

"I hate that you have such a good memory" Shane pouted, picking up his food and sulking off to the bunks.

Jordan smirked and continued playing the song, humming along with the melody.

**Two Days Later…**

"How can you even say that" I argued raising my voice and looking angrily at Jordan.

"Cause it's the truth" he countered "Rayanne is being a complete bitch right now"

"Well Shane is being a complete baby but you don't hear me saying anything about it, do you?" I yelled, standing up and moving away from him.

"Shane did nothing wrong and you know it" he pushed sitting up straight and putting his shirt back on.

"I know that Rayanne got stuck in a bad situation that she's been being punished for for the last week with no end in sight, and all Shane can do is ignore her and make her feel guilty about it" I huffed, searching the floor for my shoes.

"She should feel guilty" Jordan said like it's the most obvious thought in the world, spotting one of my shoes and handing it to me "She's the one was hiding this whole secret life all the while stringing Shane along"

"Oh please" I said, standing up after finishing slipping my shoes on "Shane knew exactly what kind of situation she was trying to avoid, and yet he pushed her right in head first; and then at the first sign of difficulty he turned his back on her, which is exactly the thing she was scared of happening in the first place."

"So you think she's innocent in all of this?" he asked completely astonished "I swear Ange, sometimes you can be so ridiculous" he chuckled to himself.

"Great" I bit, grabbing my bag and moving towards the door "well since I'm so ridiculous I'm just going to get out of here and go spend time with my bitch of a best friend. Maybe you can go find Shane and the two of you can braid each other's hair, he is your girlfriend after all" I stormed out of the bus, slamming the door behind me and walking in the direction of our bus.

"Angela" Jordan yelled from the open window of his bus. Stopping I turned around with my arms folded over my chest.

"What?" I yelled back.

"I…" he stumbled, his face softening for just a minute "I love you, even though you're being ridiculous"

I chuckled "I love you, even though you're being an insensitive ass" I turned on my heals and continued on towards the bus.

Once I reached the bus, I stormed inside only to be met with Rayanne and Alex who were sitting up front watching a movie. They both looked at me with confusion on their faces, not wanting to talk about it I headed towards the bunks, stopping just before I reached the dividing door, turning and looking back at them "Men are complete assholes" I stated, turning back around and slamming the door behind me.

**Five Days Later…**

Shane was absentmindedly drumming on the practice kit that was set up in a back corner in one of the venues. He was finding it harder and harder to avoid Rayanne; if she wasn't with Angela who was always with Jordan, then she was with Mikel out around trying to get themselves in photographs. Honestly, he'd stopped being mad at her days ago, but now it was just awkward and he didn't know what to say. He missed being around her, even if she was so frustrating and all they did was fight.

Wiping the sweat from his face, he reached down and picked up the bottle of water sitting at his feet and drank it down in one long gulp. He loved the way he felt after he'd gotten done playing around freestyle. It was like his mind would completely empty out, and everything was drowned out by the sound of his sticks hitting the drums.

Gathering his stuff he headed towards the door, but stopped dead in his tracks when he heard giggling coming down the hallway leading towards the door. Backing himself into the corner, he slid down behind one of the large speakers and buried his head in his hands. When did this happen, he thought, when did he turn into such a girl?

"I'm serious" he heard a girl's voice giggle and the shuffle of feet coming into the room "it's probably the lamest thing I've ever heard; I mean…talk about desperate"

"I know" a second voice chimed in "but he swears there was no other way to get her to agree to it…I just can't believe she was dumb enough to believe him"

"And did you hear that he actually got her to break up with her boyfriend" the first girl gasped.

"No, that's what was so brilliant about the whole thing…all he did was show up, and within hours they were broken up" she laughed "I just can't wait to see what happens after he pulls the rug out from under her…" the voices trailed off until they were just a faint giggle in the distance.

Standing up from his position on the floor he grabbed out his phone and called Jordan. He wasn't sure exactly what he'd just overheard, but he knew that they were talking about Rayanne and Mikel. They had to be right? It was too big of a coincidence for them to be talking about anyone else.

"So what should I do?" Shane asked after explaining the situation to Jordan.

"Well, I'd say that you should tell her, but since you guys haven't been talking she'd probably bite your head off" Jordan reasoned.

"I knew he was trouble" Shane huffed, picking at the label on his water "I can't believe that he's been using her"

"That's the part I don't get" Jordan said "What could he being using her for? I mean, his band is already signed it's not like he needs her or anything"

"I don't know, but if I see him I'm gonna beat it out of him" he said casually.

"That might be the answer" Jordan said with a smile in his voice.

"Really?" Shane asked "I thought you of all people would be very against bringing violence to the table"

"I'm not talking about the beating the shit out of him part, although I'd love to see that" he explained "I mean getting your answers out of him instead of trying to go through Rayanne"

"How do I do that?" Shane questioned.

"Beats me" Jordan chuckled "I'm just here for the ideas, not the execution" he joked.

**Later that night…**

Rayanne was poking at the food on her plate, pretending to listen to whatever story it was that Mikel was saying. She was finding it harder and harder to pretend to be in this relationship; the ironic thing was that she was stuck in a relationship with someone she didn't want to be with, and ran away from a relationship with someone she found out she wanted nothing more than to be with now. Every time she was with Mikel she found her mind drifting to Shane, comparing the two men had proven just how amazing Shane really was.

"So, I was thinking that we could go to dinner next Friday when we hit New York, maybe hit up a few of our old haunts" Mikel said, holding his drink up in a mock cheers to a passerby.

"How much longer are we gonna do this?" Rayanne asked sounding exhausted.

Mikel put his drink down and leaned forward, lowering his voice to a hushed whisper "What's the problem doll, we work good together"

"Don't call me doll" Rayanne bit, throwing her napkin on the table and heading out of the restaurant. Mikel threw some money down on the table and rushed after her, grabbing her arm once he caught up with her and spinning her around, not letting go of her arm.

"Listen" he fake smiled at her "We agreed that we were going to do this, so as far as I'm concerned I can call you whatever I want"

Attempting to pull herself free of him she finally gave up and looked him square in the eye "I told you I'd help you out with your mom for a little while, but I'm done ruining my life. Let's just end this…the publicity you've gotten from this should be payment enough-" Rayanne started only to be cut off by Mikel gripping her arm tighter and pushing her backwards towards a darkened corner.

"It's not that easy, _doll_" he pushed, stressing the word causing her to cringe "see if we end this now, then I have nothing to help keep our name in the air when our album drops next month, and if our name isn't relevant then our sales will drop" he said, pushing her hard against the wall.

"You're names already out there" Rayanne argued, feeling tears coming to the surface "you don't need me for that"

"How about you let me decide if I need you or not" he hissed, holding her hands down by her side and kissing her harshly on the mouth. Feeling a tear run down her cheek Mikel pushed away, looking at her with a hint of distain "Go back to the room and clean up, you look like a mess" and with that he turned and headed out to the street and out of her sight.

Rayanne nearly ran the whole way back to the hotel, stopping only long enough to find the key that had somehow managed to sink its way to the bottom of her purse. Once inside, she pushed her back against the door and hid her face behind her hands. Before she knew what she was happening, she felt a pair of arms circle around her and she broke into uncontrollable sobs. Gripping at the figure in front of her, she felt herself being led into the hotel and sat down on the couch in the front room.

"Raynie, what's going on?" She heard Rickie's soothing voice break the silence.

"I don't know how I let this happen" she answered, not letting up on her tight grip she had on him "I swore I'd never let him do this again, and then he just shows up and I all but sign a permission slip" she whispered.

"Do what again honey?" Rickie asked, pulling away and reaching for her hands. When Rayanne flinched Rickie looked down at the newly forming bruises on her arms. "Tell me this isn't what I think it is" Rickie asked with a panic in his voice.

"It's my fault" Rayanne said looking ashamed "I knew what I was doing"

"He's never getting near you again" Rickie demanded, standing up from the couch and grabbing his phone off the table. Rayanne rushed over and grabbed the phone from his hands.

"What are you doing?" she asked in a panic.

"I'm calling Angela, she's with Jordan and we're gonna get this taken care of tonight" Rickie replied taking the phone back from Rayanne.

"Rickie please" Rayanne cried, shaking her head no "please, just not tonight…I just want to go bed and forget about it, I promise we can talk about it with her tomorrow…"

Rickie looked at her for a minute before putting the phone back down. Sitting back down on the couch he motioned for her to come sit next to him. Following his directions, Rayanne moved towards the couch, laying her head in his lap and closing her eyes. Tears began falling from his eyes as he stroked her hair, waiting for her to fall asleep.

**The next morning…**

I walked in to the hotel room with a lazy grin on my face. I was happier then I'd ever remembered being and I knew that it was because of Jordan. I knew that the only thing that could make things perfect would be for Rayanne to figure out a way out of this stupid fake marriage with Mikel. Placing my key on the table by the door, I walked into the front room shocked at the sight in front of me; Rickie was sitting up on the couch his legs propped up on the coffee table and his head leaning against the back, and Rayanne curled up in his lap. They were both still dressed in the clothes they had worn the day before. I grabbed a blanket off the back of the chair and came around to the front of the couch and laid the blanket over Rayanne, pulling it up lightly over her shoulder, but something made me stop. It was a deep purple bruise on her arm about the size of a hand. I quickly looked to the arm she had draped over Rickie's lap and saw a matching bruise a little higher on that arm.

Standing back up, I pulled my phone out of my bag and headed back outside so I wouldn't wake Rickie or Rayanne. "Hey babe" I heard Jordan cheerily answer.

"Jordan, I think we have a problem" I spoke into the phone, feeling a tear slide slowly down my cheek.


	19. Chapter 19

**Is anyone still reading this? I hope so, sorry that I didn't get this up sooner if you are. Please let me know that you're still there!**

**Chapter 19.**

Jordan was pacing back and forth in his hotel room. He'd just gotten off the phone with Angela and he felt completely lost at what he should do now. Well, that was a lie; he knew exactly what he wanted to do, and that was to beat the shit out of Mikel. Rayanne was family to him, and the idea that someone could hurt a part of his family was not something that he was ok with letting happen. But the thing that was holding him back was Shane. He knew that once Shane found out it was going to be all that he could to do to keep him from killing Mikel. So that's where his mind was now, trying to figure out how to handle both situations.

Shane entered the room with Caleb in tow laughing at something he'd just said. When he saw the look on Jordan's face his eye brows drew in tightly and he sighed. Plopping down on the couch he rubbed his face and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "Ok," he sighed "What's the drama now?" he asked a little exhausted.

Caleb came around the couch and sat in the chair facing Jordan and looked at him expectantly. Sighing he sat down on the edge of the coffee table in between Caleb and Shane and took one last moment to think about how he wanted to say this. Knowing that there was nothing he could do to soften the blow, he stood back up and began pacing again.

"Ok, so I need for you to promise that you're not gonna do anything stupid" Jordan started, laying down his ground rules before continuing on.

"What do you mean?" Shane asked watching Jordan pace back and forth.

"Just promise me that you'll stay in the room for the next few hours" Jordan urged, looking between Shane and Caleb.

"Fine I guess" Shane replied unsure of where this whole thing was headed.

"Ok, well…I just got done talking with Angela and…well she doesn't know exactly what happened last night, but I mean, I guess she's sort of put two and two together and figured out what happened…but it sort of seemed to her like this is what happened…she's talking about it right now with them, and I just want you to know that she's safe and that Rickie and her aren't letting her out of their sight-" Jordan said, rushing through everything.

"Just spit it out Catalano" Shane interrupted looking impatiently at Jordan.

"Angela found bruises all over Rayanne's arms this morning…hand print size bruises…she's pretty sure they're from Mikel" Jordan answered. Shane's jaw clenched tightly shut as he waited for Jordan to continue. "They're in their hotel room now; Angela swore to me that she won't let Rayanne out of the room until they figure out what's going on and she won't let her get anywhere near Mikel by herself" Jordan explained.

Shane stood up and rushed towards the door. Jordan rushed around him and blocked the door with his body. Caleb jumped over the couch and attempted to pull Shane back, which was proving harder then he'd expected.

"Come on Shane" Jordan tried to reason "I know you're mad, and believe me I think that all of us would love nothing more than to let you teach this guy a lesson, but we need to wait until we hear from Angela"

"I'm not waiting around for that" Shane spit out, shaking Caleb off of him and moving Jordan out of the way "This guy put his hands on her!" he yelled, opening the door and towards the elevator with Jordan and Caleb right behind him "So now, I'm gonna go and put my hands on him, and we're gonna see how well he likes it" Pushing the button he waited for the elevator to arrive, turning and looking at his friends he continued on "So the way I see it, you either come with me to make sure that I don't kill this guy or you stay here, it's your choice" Looking towards the numbers above the elevator, Shane huffed and decided to just take the stairs.

"I'm gonna go with him," Jordan said looking to Caleb "you coming?"

"Dude, I'm not gonna let you guys have all the fun" Caleb said, rushing behind him in attempt to catch up to Shane.

…

We were sitting around the living space in the hotel room, sipping at coffee and picking at Danishes. The mood was somber and intense, none of us really saying much. "How did this happen?" I asked quietly, more afraid for Rayanne than I'd ever been in my life.

"It only happened twice before" she answered, looking shamefully in my direction. "The first time, we were both really…really drunk and I'm not exactly sure what started it. The next day, he apologized…like a thousand times and I just chalked it up to being insanely wasted, but the other time…we were both sober. It was a little over a year ago, and I had told him that I didn't want to sleep with him anymore, and he just got so mad and he pushed me against the wall and I cut my head pretty bad-"

"Wait," Rickie interrupted "You told me that you hit your head getting into your car, why did you lie to me?" he asked hurt.

"What was I supposed to say?" Rayanne cried "I was so embarrassed and ashamed. I didn't want you to feel like it was your job to take of me" Rickie stood up from the couch and stormed out of the room. "I know that I should have said something, but I didn't want to be a burden" she mumbled softly.

"Raynie" I sighed "it wouldn't have made you a burden. You are family…we could have been there for you"

"I just thought that I could take care of it on my own" she said softly "When he showed up here, I just didn't know what to do. Part of me was just scared of what he could do if I turned him down and I just didn't know how to say no to him"

"Well I don't care what he thinks he can do, you're not going anywhere near him again, you got that" Rickie said firmly coming back into the room and sitting back down beside Rayanne. "If you ever do anything stupid like this again" he warned pulling her into a hug.

"I'm sorry" she cried tightening her grip on Rickie.

"So what do we do now?" Rickie asked, looking to me while stroking Rayanne's hair.

"Well, I called Jordan this morning and I'm pretty sure-"I started only for Rayanne to straighten up and cut me off.

"You told Jordan" she said panicked "Angela, why would you tell him?"

"Why wouldn't I tell him?" I asked looking at her like she was crazy "Raynie, this is serious; we have to make sure that you're safe no matter what, Jordan can help with that" I reasoned.

"I just want it to disappear" she sighed "the more people that know, the less chance there is of that happening"

"We'll take care of this" Rickie said, rubbing her back "I'm gonna take care of **you**" he stressed.

…

Shane had lost track of Jordan and Caleb somewhere in the lobby but he wasn't letting that distract from his mission at hand; to find Mikel and make him regret ever touching Rayanne. His anger was clouding his mind, keeping him from thinking straight as he moved from point to point haphazardly in an attempt to locate him. He stopped and laced his fingers in front of his face and sighed deeply. He wasn't sure what he was doing, scratch that…he knew exactly what he was doing, but in that moment he realized he had no clue where to begin looking for him. Turning his attention to the ceiling he closed his eyes and let out a loud "Fuck" before turning and heading in the direction of the doors; deciding he would head over to the practice space located a few blocks away from the hotel.

Stepping out of the hotel he began jogging the few blocks to the practice space. He could hear Jordan calling his name behind him, but that only made him pick up his pace. He knew that once he found Mikel it would only be a matter of seconds before Jordan and Caleb would catch up and stop him from doing too much damage. His head told him that it would be better to let them catch him now and turn around and head back to the hotel before he got himself in trouble; but he never was one to listen to that nagging voice in his head before so why start now.

Rushing through the doors of the practice space he headed for the first room, but was disappointed that it was empty. The next door was locked, and the one after that had a group of girls practicing some dance number. Shane began to wonder if he was even here or if he'd ever be lucky enough to find him. Stopping at a cross of hallways his ears perked up at the sound of a guitar at the end of the hall. Following the sound he finally saw Mikel through the glass window on the door. Shane's blood began to boil at the sight of him acting so casual as he ripped the door open and stormed inside.

"Sorry bro, this space is taken" Mikel said barely looking up from his guitar when he heard the door open.

"I'm not looking for space" Shane bit crossing the room in just a few strides pushing him from behind.

"What the fuck?" Mikel growled, turning around after stumbling forward. Shane threw a punch that connected with his jaw and sent him crashing back against the wall.

"Not a lot of fun huh" Shane growled pinning him against the wall and grabbing him by the shirt collar, pulling him forward and slamming him backwards again.

"What's your problem man?" Mikel yelled pushing Shane off of him and hitting him on the side of his face.

"You deciding it would be ok to put your hands on my girl is what my problem is" Shane replied, licking at the blood that was forming on the side of his lip; lunging forward again he collided with Mikel who started fighting back.

"Last time I checked she was still technically my girl" Mikel argued back, hitting Shane in the side causing him to double over. "Besides," he continued on, hitting him on the other side "she deserved it".

Shane stood up straight and hit him square on the jaw with his left fist, and followed that with a jab from the right. Mikel's eyes winced shut at the pain that began pulsing in his head. With another punch to the jaw, Mikel fell limply to the ground chuckling at the situation he'd found himself in. Shane's rage only grew at the slight smile on Mikel's face "I'll tell you one thing" he said kicking him in the side before moving so he was positioned over him "you're gonna be singing a different tune once I'm done with you". He got in a few more punches before he felt someone pulling him off of Mikel and back towards the door. Shaking Jordan and Caleb off, he straightened himself up and looked to Mikel who was slowly sitting up. "You so much as come within a mile of her again and you'll wish that this is all I'll do to you" he turned and stormed out of the room.

"Your friends got quite the temper" Mikel said dryly, spitting out some blood and popping his jaw as he moved from his spot on the ground to sitting on the edge of an amp.

"You're lucky" Caleb icily replied "but if there's a next time, I'll help him kill you"

Mikel scoffed and started to get up, only to be met with Jordan's fist hitting him across the cheek causing him to trip backwards over the amp and land with a thud on the ground. "Don't even think we're joking. Stay away from Rayanne" he warned following Caleb out of the room and after Shane.

They caught up with Shane who was leaning against a building about a block down. His hands and face were bloody and he was breathing pretty hard. "You ok man?" Jordan asked stepping in front of him to inspect the damages.

Shane winced a little when he tilted his head up to take a look at the cut above his eye that was slowly starting to swell. "I'll be fine" he mumbled shaking Jordan's hand away.

"I don't think we can say the same for Mikel" Caleb laughed "that last punch Jay threw may have been the straw that broke the camel's back" he chuckled. Shane smiled a little at the situation before pushing off the building and heading back in the direction of the hotel.

"So what are we doing now?" Jordan asked, falling into step beside Shane.

"Well, first I'm gonna go clean up this mess" he answered motioning to the cuts on his hands and face "and then I think it's about time I tried to clean up the mess with Rayanne."

"They're playing a small radio thing in a couple hours; we can swing by that if you'd like and then you can catch her after the show." Jordan suggested looking down at his watch to check the time.

"Perfect" Shane nodded, even though the butterflies in his stomach were becoming harder to ignore at the thought of having to talk to her now.

…

Rayanne smiled at the crowd that was clapping for the song they just finished. Tugging the sleeves of her sweater down, covering her hands she shifted uncomfortably and tried to hide how tired she was. Reaching up she tilted the microphone down and spoke a light "Thank you" before turning her head and smiling at Angela who was strumming a few chords as she changed the tuning for the next song. She spotted Rickie and Alex over Angela's shoulder standing backstage and she felt a wave of calm rush over her. Taking a breath she turned her attention back to the crowd. "It's great to be here tonight, and we're so happy to get the opportunity to play such an intimate show for you guys" licking her lips she looked at Angela one last time to see if she was ready, and with a nod continued on "We've decided to play a few of our old songs for you so please sing along if you'd like. This one's called _Fool That I Am_"

Rickie leaned back into Alex's arms and sighed as he watched his best friends perform. He knew that Rayanne was safe here, but he still had this nagging feeling in his gut that something was happening that he wouldn't be able to control. He already felt responsible for not protecting her so far, and it worried him that there could be something else that he couldn't stop from hurting her. Sensing that there were other people behind him he tilted his head to the left and stood straight up when he caught sight of Shane and Jordan in the shadows. "What happened to you?" he asked Shane moving over to get a better look at his face.

"It's not that bad, you should see the other guy" Shane attempted to joke.

"Please tell me you didn't kill him" Alex asked sitting down across from him.

"It was pretty close" Jordan cut in "but we stopped him before it got that far"

"Does this mean you're finally going to forgive her?" Rickie asked with a small hint of venom in his voice.

"Only if she'll forgive me" Shane replied honestly.

The sound of the audience clapping caused them all to turn their attention back to the stage as Rayanne began talking again.

"Thank you" she smiled softly "This next song is about being in a new relationship, but being haunted by the memory of the one that got away; about pretending to move on even though you know that from now on everyone can only come in second, it's called _Thinking of You_"

Comparisons are easily done  
>Once you've had a taste of perfection<br>Like an apple hanging from a tree  
>I picked the ripest one<br>I still got the seed

You said move on  
>Where do I go<br>I guess second best  
>Is all I will know<p>

'Cause when I'm with him  
>I am thinking of you<br>Thinking of you  
>What you would do if<br>You were the one  
>Who was spending the night<br>Oh I wish that I  
>Was looking into your eyes<p>

You're like an Indian summer  
>In the middle of winter<br>Like a hard candy  
>With a surprise center<br>How do I get better  
>Once I've had the best<br>You said there's  
>Tons of fish in the water<br>So the waters I will test

He kissed my lips  
>I taste your mouth<br>He pulled me in  
>I was disgusted with myself<p>

Cause when I'm with him  
>I am thinking of you<br>Thinking of you  
>What you would do if<br>You were the one  
>Who was spending the night<br>Oh I wish that I  
>Was looking into...<p>

You're the best  
>And yes I do regret<br>How I could let myself  
>Let you go<br>Now the lesson's learned  
>I touched it I was burned<br>Oh I think you should know

'Cause when I'm with him  
>I am thinking of you<br>Thinking of you  
>What you would do if<br>You were the one  
>Who was spending the night<br>Oh I wish that I  
>Was looking into your eyes<br>Looking into your eyes  
>Looking into your eyes<br>Oh won't you walk through  
>And bust in the door<br>And take me away  
>Oh no more mistakes<br>'Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay...  
>stay...<p>

Everyone silently watched as Rayanne wiped away the tears that had been falling throughout the song. Rickie swore he could see Shane wipe away a stray tear as well, but he was too fixed on Rayanne to turn his head completely and check. The rest of the set continued on without much interaction backstage as everything suddenly became serious.

Rayanne's heart began pounding when she noticed Shane sitting in the shadows out of the corner of her eye. She'd never been more scared and excited to see someone in her life. She figured he knew about last night; it wouldn't be Jordan to not tell him, but she didn't want that to be the reason he was here. She wanted him to be here cause he missed her even half as much as she missed him but the insecure part of her brain told her he wasn't there for that. After all, if he did miss her he would have showed up sooner. She followed a few paces behind Angela as they made their way off stage, keeping her eyes glued to the ground.

"You did great" Rickie praised as they met up with everyone. Angela attached herself to Jordan, and Rayanne drew in a deep breath changing the direction of her stare from the ground to the ceiling to her hands that were keeping busy twisting at the sleeves that she had pulled down as far as she could get them. Rayanne could hear everyone talking and carrying on, but it all sounded so far away that she was having trouble retaining anything. Truthfully, the fact that she could feel Shane's eyes staring at her was making her uneasy. She wanted to look up and meet his stare, but she was so afraid that she'd only be met with pity.

Turning her attention to Angela she tilted her head towards the door and mouthed "I'm gonna get out of here", hoping she'd just be able to slip away unnoticed. Angela nodded and began to follow her before Rayanne shook her head no. "I'll be fine" she smiled and hurried off.

Angela was about to chase after her but Shane put his hand out and stopped her "I'll go, I won't let anything happen to her" he smiled and rushed out in the direction Rayanne had just headed off to.

Rayanne could feel Shane behind her, it was like her body could tell whenever he was near; but he didn't say anything. She tried to quicken her pace, but that didn't seem to shake him. This was it, she thought, they were finally alone and that fact terrified her.

The elevator ride up to her room was completely silent except for the pounding of her heart which she was sure he could hear. Stepping out onto her floor she fumbled around her bag for her key, stopping awkwardly before opening the door she took a deep breath and looked at him causing her breath to catch in her throat "What happened to your face?" she asked starting to reach up to touch him, only to catch herself and let her hand drop back to her side.

"Let's just go inside and we can talk about it" he answered, nodding his head towards the door.

Rayanne nodded in agreement and went inside, dropping her stuff on the floor by the door to her room. "Thanks" she smiled shortly at him "For walking me back here, I mean"

"He's not gonna hurt you again" he replied, moving closer to her.

"Is that what happened to your face?" She questioned, tears coming to her eyes when he nodded out a confirmation. "You're so stupid" she choked out, pushing him backwards "You could have got really hurt" she cried.

"Please" Shane scoffed "On his best day he couldn't have hurt me, these" he said motioning to the cuts on his face "were just lucky shots. He's the one you should be worried about"

"Why" Rayanne whispered.

"Cause I beat the shit out of him" Shane answered looking at her like she was crazy for not following.

"No, I mean…why did you do it…I thought I didn't matter anymore" she corrected, bowing her head in embarrassment.

"Don't you get it" he spoke softly, moving back towards her, cupping her face in his hands and tilting her head back up so that she was looking into his eyes "You've always mattered".

"I'm so sorry" she cried bringing her hands up and resting them on Shane's "I wish I could take it all back"

"Don't cry" he whispered, wiping her tears away with his thumb "I was dumb, I shouldn't have just ditched you like that" he said wrapping his arms around her and kissing the top of her head.

They stood there, wrapped up in each other for what felt like ages; neither of them daring to speak in fear that they might ruin the moment. Realizing they couldn't remain like that forever, Rayanne pulled back slightly, taking his hands in hers and pulling him into the bedroom.

"What are you doing?" he asked softly.

"I'm tired" she admitted "I'm tired of pretending, I'm tired of fighting, I'm tired of acting like I'm not scared" she said, slipping out of her jeans and shirt, standing in front of Shane in her tank top and boy shorts. Licking her lips she unbuttoned Shane's jeans and pushed his shirt up over his head "I just want to pretend, even if it's only for tonight, that it's just us and everything is…perfect" she smiled softly at Shane, running her hands up his body sending shivers following close behind.

"Who are you and what have you done with Rayanne?" he joked, taking her hands and pulling them up to his face and kissing her palms.

"Shut up" she giggled lunging forward and kissing him hard. "I lost you once" she said, pausing to kiss him again "I'm not making those same mistakes"

"That's where you're wrong doll" he said picking her up and kissing her nose "you never lost me."

Rayanne smiled before breaking out in a fit of giggles. "I'm sorry….that was just so cheesy of us" she erupted again, throwing her head back as Shane started laughing along with her.

"There's my girl" he said, putting her down on the bed and crawling on top of her, silencing her giggles with a kiss.

….

Shane woke up the next morning expecting to find the bed empty. Rolling over he heard Rayanne moan from under him and felt her push him back over.

"Geez Shane" she moaned stretching and pulling his arm over her body and closing her eyes again "try not to kill me tomorrow"

Shane smiled as he tightened his grip, pulling her flush against his chest "Thanks for not running off this morning" he whispered into her ear.

"You're welcome" she whispered back, snuggling farther back into him. Maybe this won't be so hard she thought.


	20. Chapter 20

**First off-THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! All of your reviews were such a surprise and made me so happy. This next chapter is a little thank you present for you guys-full of Jordan and Angela fluff. I know that it's a little bit shorter than the normal chapters, but I couldn't add the next part in without ruining this chapter. I will be returning to more Jordan and Angela interaction, but with the last section I found that I really liked writing for Shane and Rayanne so I will still be playing around with them a little bit longer. Also-I might try and interact with Rickie and Alex if you'd be interested in reading their story as well. Please let me know what you think. I hope you enjoy.**

**Chapter 20.**

"Babe, this is the worst movie I've ever seen in my entire life" Jordan complained from his spot behind me.

Gasping in mock hurt I turned my head sideways so I could look at him over my shoulder "How can you hate this movie" I asked continuing on without giving him a chance to answer "It's romantic and perfect" I sighed looking back to the screen as I watched the title character walk across the field towards the man she just realized she loved.

"It's gushy, and this guy is totally lame" he teased, leaning his head forward and kissing my neck.

"Take that back!" I exclaimed, leaning forward and turning to face him "Mr. Darcy is not lame" Jordan chuckled at my attempt to be intimidating, looking at the clock on the table. Brushing my hair behind my ear he stood up, taking my hand in his and pulling me up alongside him. "Where are we going?" I asked as he led me off the bus.

"We've been cooped up on that bus all day" he answered as he slung his arm around my shoulder. Wrapping my arm around his waist I leaned into his embrace and looked up at him as he continued on. "I just thought it'd be nice to get out and take a walk with my girl" I smiled up at him before he leaned down and kissed me softly, never breaking our stride.

"It's so quiet out here tonight" I said softly, barely able to hear the sound of one of the shows in the distance.

"It's the last night in Philly" he answered "Most people have already headed out to the next city" he explained, pulling his phone out of his pocket and clicking a few buttons before returning it to his pocket.

"I like it" I mused "It makes me feel like we've gone back in time and we're walking the streets in Three Rivers, back before anyone knew who we were" I reached my other hand up and laced my fingers with Jordan's.

"Only we'd be driving around in my old car instead of walking" he smiled down at me.

"And we'd be speeding through the streets trying to get me home before my curfew so my dad wouldn't ground me" I laughed at the memories.

"And after I dropped you off, I'd stay parked down the street a little ways until I saw you turn your light off before I headed home" he sighed, stopping us so he could turn and face me.

"Did you really do that?" he nodded in response "Why?" I asked, playing with the sleeve of his shirt.

"I wanted to make sure you were safe and sound I guess" he answered cupping my face in his hands. "I was always afraid that you'd finally come to your senses one day and realize how much better off you were without me, and I somehow convinced myself that if I stayed there watching you until after midnight then it'd technically be the next day and everything would still be ok"

"You're so crazy" I smiled, wrapping my arms around his waist and burring my face in his chest "I would have been so lost without you; I was yours before you even knew who I was" I confessed closing my eyes and breathing in his scent. I felt his arms wrap tighter around me and I could hear his heart pounding in his chest. "Your hearts racing" I said pulling away and looking up at Jordan concerned.

"That's your fault Red" he smiled cocking an eyebrow at me, pulling me along towards the sound of the music in the distance.

We watched the show from the back of the crowd, laughing and singing along. It felt like everything was moving in slow motion, like the universe was finally letting us be happy and had slowed down time so that we could enjoy every second we were getting together. I watched Jordan carefully, etching this moment into my memory as he sang along with a cover of an Oasis song. A smile formed on my face as the memory of the first time I watched Jordan sing came rushing into my brain.

_7 years ago…_

I can't believe I actually showed up at the loft. I mean, sure Jordan kind of invited me…but I think it was just to get past that awkward moment in the classroom. It was obvious that he couldn't care less that I was here; he won't even look over at me.

"Maybe we should just get out of here" I said looking embarrassingly at Rickie "It was a dumb idea to come anyway"

"It wasn't dumb" Rickie said, trying to be nice "I mean he did invite you, right?"

I looked across the room at Jordan who was listening to something Shane was saying and chewing at the side of his thumb. "It's so weird you know" I said, not taking my eyes off of Jordan "when you have this whole scenario of how you think that the night is going to turn out, and then it just…doesn't even come close" I sighed standing up slowly and offering my hand to Rickie "Let's get out of here before I lose all my dignity". Rickie grabbed my hand and pulled me towards to the door.

"Angela?" Jordan's voice caused us to freeze in our spot. "Hey" he muttered suddenly appearing beside us "Um…you wanna hear that song I was talking to you about?" he stumbled awkwardly nodding his head in the direction of his guitar sitting in the middle of the room.

"Sure" I smiled, turning around and following him. Rickie sat back down beside me and smiled apologetically.

I was going nowhere

Going nowhere fast

Drowning in my memories

Living in the past

Everything looked black till I found her

She's all I need and that's what I said

Oh, I call her red

She's my shelter from the storm

She's a place to rest my head

Late at night she keeps me safe and warm

I call her red

"Oh my God" Rickie whispered.

"So, I mean….it's not finished…or whatever" Jordan mumbled before standing up and walking away.

"Oh my God" Rickie repeated like a broken record "Angela, that was about you! Jordan Catalano just sang you a song…that he wrote about you…" he gushed. I chuckled, letting out the breath I'd been holding since Jordan sat down to play.

Present_ Day…_

The feeling of Jordan's arms wrapping around me broke me out of my trip down memory lane. "Where's your head at?" he whispered in my ear. I let myself relax against his chest.

"I was just thinking…remember that night that you invited me to the loft and you sang me that song about your car" I smiled, poking fun at him about the subject of his song. I felt him nod over my shoulder.

"I remember that night, but that song wasn't about my car" he laughed.

"You told Rickie it was about your car" I pressed.

"Of course I did" he chuckled slinging his arm around my shoulder as we walked back in the direction of the bus "I wasn't really the king of romance back then and when I thought I'd blown it with you I didn't want to have to face up to it" he looked down at me "You saved my life Red" he admitted honestly.

I didn't know what to say to him at that point. It was the most sincere and honest expression of his feelings I'd ever heard; so I just tightened my arm around his waist and continued walking alongside him. The breeze was just lite enough that I was getting a few goose bumps on my arms, but it was warm enough that they disappeared just as fast as they came. Lightening bugs danced around in the distance and the sound of the cricket's song was drowning out the voices behind us. In that moment I felt completely and utterly at peace; if I could create the most perfect moment it couldn't even come close to this one.

Jordan stopped a few feet from the bus and I turned to look at him. "Why are you stopping?" I smiled questioningly back at him. The expression on his face was hard to read, it was a sort of mixture between nervousness and excitement.

"I love you" he replied simply.

"I love you too" I chuckled "But can we talk about this on the bus?" I smiled brightly, starting to walk backwards pulling him along with me. He stopped me just before I reached the handle on the door. Kissing me softly but intense, he reached around me and opened the door, moving aside so that I could enter first. The sight before me took my breath away.

There was a sprinkling of candles over ever surface in the main cabin. Rickie and Alex were sitting at the table holding candles and smiling at me. Rayanne was sitting next to Shane who had a guitar in his lap. I let out a small chuckle as Shane began strumming out the melody I'd heard Jordan humming the day he picked me up from the airport. I turned to smile at him before I heard Rayanne begin to sing along with Shane's playing.

Something is said, it sits in my head  
>It's been there too long, it's killing me slow<br>It's rolling around, it's pushing me down  
>It's keeping the good part of me closed<p>

Can't you see that when I find you, I'll find me

Oh I need you to know today I'll wait for you always  
>Oh I need you to know today I'll wait for you always<p>

My only weakness, is knowing your secrets  
>and holding them close, and hold them tight<br>I know the way to silently make you  
>smile with my eyes, when you're trying to fight<p>

Can't you see that when I find you, I'll find me

Oh I need you to know today I'll wait for you always  
>Oh I need you to know today I'll wait for you always<p>

Cause when I find you, I'll find me

Can't you see that when I find you I'll find me

Oh I need you to know today I'll wait for you always  
>Oh I need you to know today I'll wait for you always<br>Oh I need you to know today I'll wait for you always

When I find you...  
>When I find you...<p>

...I'll find me

I wiped at the tears that had begun falling from my eyes. Before I knew what was happening, Jordan was standing in front of me, his hands on either side of my face, wiping at the tears with his thumbs.

"Ange, I love you. I've loved you since moment I first saw you. I know that I've made mistakes, and I hope you know that I promise to spend the rest of my life making up for those mistakes. Years ago, I gave you a ring, and told you that I hoped to make it official one day…well today's that day. I've lived without you, and I never want to know that pain again. You're my heart…you're my soul…you're my best friend…marry me. Let me make you as happy as you make me…marry me. Marry me" he whispered as a tear fell from his eye.

"Of course" I choked out, leaping forward and wrapping my arms around his neck. Opening my eyes I saw Rickie and Alex crying and holding on to each other. Shane wiped a tear from Rayanne's eye before kissing her sweetly on the lips. It was the most perfect moment, with all the people that I cared so much about surrounding us. I pulled back from Jordan and kissed him softly on the lips, whispering an "I love you" before pulling away.

Shane clearing his throat broke the trance I was under. He was motioning something to Jordan that I couldn't understand, and from the look on Jordan's face neither could he. After trying unsuccessfully once more, he finally choked out "Ring" before covering his mouth and fake coughing.

Jordan looked shocked for a moment before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small ring. Taking my hand in his he slowly slid it on my finger. I looked up questioningly at him after inspecting my grandmother's old ring "Is this?" I started, unable to get the question out.

"Yeah" he smiled "I met up with your mom last week and she brought it for me. I wanted to do it proper you know, ask for your parent's permission and everything" he answered, pulling me flush against him "do you like it?" he asked softly.

"Guys" I started, not taking my eyes away from his "I'm glad you were here for this, but could you get lost now" I asked, pushing Jordan backwards and towards the bunks.

Alex and Rickie laughed and hurried off the bus, yelling back a "congratulations" before they were gone. Rayanne moved to start blowing out the candles before Shane grabbed her hand and attempted to pull her off the bus "Come on doll, let's get out of here before these two get inappropriate" he joked.

"But all these candles" she started pulling her hand away from his and moving around frantically. Shane stepped forward and threw her over his shoulder.

"Congrats guys" he smiled back at us as he moved down the stairs.

"Don't forget to blow out the candles" Rayanne yelled back before the door closed behind her.

I already had Jordan's shirt unbuttoned and was working on mine before the door had closed all the way. He was kicking off his shoes and unbuttoning my jeans in the same movement. I shimmied out of my pants and broke from Jordan's kiss long enough to push his undershirt over his head. "The candles" he whispered against my lips.

"Who cares about the candles" I smiled, kissing down his neck "You just asked me to marry you in the most perfect way, and I want to show you how happy I am" I said kissing back up towards his mouth.

He smiled "Perfect?" he asked cocking his eyebrow at me.

"Don't look so surprised" I giggled "everything about you is perfect".

"Right back at ya Red" he laughed, picking me up and carrying me towards the bunks.


	21. Chapter 21

**Thank you guys for the reviews for the last chapter. I know that some of you thought that the proposal was a little fast, but you have to remember that the time they spent apart was brutal for Jordan, and since he finally got her back he didn't want to chance losing her again. Don't worry though, the quickness of the proposal will be addressed again in future chapters, but for right now they've been living in a little bit of a fantasy world since they've been on this tour together for the summer. But now with the summer coming to a close, they are about to be forced back into the real world. I hope that you like the story line progressions for the other characters as well. I'm going to try and balancing out the story this way, focusing mainly on Jordan and Angela, but with story lines developing for everyone else at the same time. Please let me know what you think about this chapter and I'll try and post sooner than I have been…..**

"Earth to Angela" Rickie laughed, waving his hand in front of her face "Geeze, you're like a raccoon who found something shiny. Time to rejoin the living or we're going to take that thing away from you" he joked about the ring that had had Angela's undivided attention for the last few days.

"Sorry" she blushed, putting her hand under the table and rejoining the conversation "It just seems so unreal, you know?" biting her lip to stop the smile from taking over her face.

"I think I'm gonna be sick" Rayanne fake gagged, earning a push from Rickie "What? The two of you are normally really gushy, but ever since he put a ring that finger it's been a thousand times worse" Rayanne jokingly teased her.

"A thousand times worse?" Angela asked cocking her eyebrow at Rayanne who simply nodded in response. "You're one to talk, _doll_" Angela teased back. Rayanne's mouth dropped open in surprise.

"She got you there Raynie" Rickie laughed sipping the water in front of him.

"I don't know what you guys are talking about" Rayanne replied, thumbing through the magazine sitting in her lap.

"Please" Angela laughed, throwing a grape in Rayanne's direction "You and 'Shaney' have been just as bad as us, if not worse cause it's just so not normal for either of you"

Rayanne blushed and pushed her hair behind her ear "We're not that bad. Tell her Rickie" she said, turning to Rickie for support.

"Actually…" he winced "you two have been pretty cutesy these last few weeks" Rayanne huffed and narrowed her eyes at him "It's not a bad thing; so you guys hold hands in public and have nicknames for each other….it's really nice to see you so happy"

"We held hands _**once**_, and that was only because it was really crowded and we didn't want to lose each other" Rayanne defended.

"What about the nicknames?" Angela pushed with a small smile on her face.

"It's so weird" Rayanne mumbled, chewing on the side of her thumb "I mean, I always thought that this was impossible, but with Shane it's just…" she said, letting her thought drift off.

"Oh Rickie" Angela sighed in a fake southern drawl "Our little baby's growing up"

Rickie moved over to Angela's side and wrapped her arms around her, carrying on with her charade "After all these years…"

"You two are completely insane" Rayanne laughed burying her face into her magazine.

…..

"So there's only about a week left" Jordan breathed out as he lifted the weight bar up while Alex spotted him.

"What's your point?" Shane grunted from his spot a few machines down.

"Nothing, I was just wondering what your plan was" he answered as Alex helped him put the bar back in its place. Sitting up he wiped his face with a towel before trading places with Alex.

"Why does there have to be a plan?" Alex questioned as he took the bar back off its resting spot.

"Exactly" Shane agreed placing the weights on the ground and reaching for his water "We don't need to have a plan, neither of us are on tour and with you and Angela practically attached at the hip it's not gonna be that hard to see each other" he answered drinking down his water in a few gulps.

"Not like that kind of plan" Jordan replied taking over spotting Alex as he did his reps "I mean, what's next for you guys-is she like your girlfriend now?" Jordan teased looking over at Shane who was busy fidgeting with the empty bottle in his hands.

"Shut up man" Shane mumbled standing up and throwing the bottle in the trash "We're perfectly happy with the way things are, we don't have to like…put a label on it"

"I'm not saying that you do" Jordan pushed "It's just…well, this summer has been like an escape, for all of us…I was just wondering what was gonna happen when we all step back into reality"

"Why does anything have to change?" Alex asked, sitting up and looking between the two friends "I mean, so what you guys aren't all going to be on the same schedule-that doesn't mean that the world's coming to the end" Shane knew that he was right, but something in the back of his mind was making him wonder if maybe his world was about to come crashing down around him.

…..

"So you're telling me that you never even thought about it?" Angela questioned, popping a piece of chocolate in her mouth.

"Not really" Rickie answered reaching over and grabbing a piece for himself "I mean, I love New York…but I just assumed that once you and Jordan got your crap together that we'd just all pack up and head to LA. It just makes sense" he said like it was the easiest decision in the world.

"What about you Raynie, what do you think?" Angela asked.

"I don't know…I mean, New York has been good to us, and I'm gonna miss that life-but I mean, you're about to get married…that kind of trumps the takeout" Rayanne answered stretching out on the bench seat. "Have you talked to Jordan about this yet?"

"No, we're kind of having a hard time staying out of bed when we're alone" Angela blushed.

"Angelika!" Rayanne giggled "I'm so proud of you right now"

"She has a point though" Rickie laughed along "Maybe Jordan wants to move to New York"

Angela sighed and fidgeted with the ring on her finger "I don't care where we end up" she answered honestly "All I know is that I belong with him; so where ever he is…that's where I'll be"

"Same for us" Rickie agreed "Whatever you decide we'll be fine with"

"So you'd be ok with moving to LA?" Angela asked looking at Rayanne.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Rayanne replied, looking confused with her friend's question.

"I just mean, well…don't take this the wrong way, but you've never been one for commitment, and even though I know that you'd be moving for me…I just don't want to put an added stress on whatever it is that's going on with you and Shane right now" Angela nervously stumbled through the conversation.

"Huh" Rayanne huffed "Well, I didn't think about that, but I guess I don't see why it would be a problem. I mean, it's not like I'd be moving for him like you said, and I'd have my own place so it's not like he'd have any reason to freak out…"she drifted off.

"So what is the story between you two" Rickie asked.

"I don't know" she shrugged "I mean whatever it is seems to be working for us…I don't really want to rock the boat by asking him what we're doing"

…

"I don't think that she wants to be my 'girlfriend'" Shane said as they were leaving the gym.

"Why do you think that?" Jordan questioned stepping to Shane's left as Alex fell into step on the right.

"I don't know…she hasn't said anything, but that's kind of what makes me think she's happy with the way things are" he shrugged "Hell, I'm just happy I've got her staying through the night right now and not freaking out when I grabbed her hand in public the other night. It might send her running back in the other direction if I tried to call her my girlfriend"

"I don't think you're giving her enough credit" Alex piped up "I mean, I know that she's always been a little phobic about all of this stuff…but even you guys have to admit that she's done a complete 180 since that night"

"That's true man" Jordan agreed "I never thought I'd ever live to see the day that Rayanne not only let a guy open a door for her, but also let him order for her at dinner"

"She couldn't decide what she wanted and I'd been there before" Shane defended a little embarrassed to know that his friend had remembered those seemingly meaningless moments.

"If that's your story" Jordan laughed, pushing Shane teasingly.

"Whatever, it doesn't even matter…who cares what I call her or what she calls me…" Shane started before being interrupted by both Alex and Jordan chiming at the same time.

"Shaney" Alex laughed

"Doll" Jordan poked.

"You're both ones to talk" Shane replied pushing Jordan back "Angela's got you wrapped so tightly around that little finger of hers and all Rickie has to do is snap his fingers and you'd come running" he joked.

"In a heartbeat" Alex agreed "that's what's so great about being in love though, he doesn't have to snap-I'm always there"

"And Angela may have me wrapped around her finger, but there's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be" Jordan smiled lazily.

"Let's just get back to the girls, you two are starting to drive me crazy" Shane teased, grabbing a cab and jumping in the back seat.

…..

"How was the work out?" Rickie asked Alex from across the table in a small diner down the street from the hotel room.

"Good, but those two talk way to much about their feelings" Alex joked "I swear, you'd think they were they gay ones instead of me"

"I'm glad that you get along with them" Rickie started hesitantly.

"They're great guys" Alex said while looking over the menu in front of him "want to split some nachos?"

"Sure" Rickie said, pushing his menu away and grabbing Alex's and placing it on top of his "I kind of have something I want to talk to you about"

"Why do I feel like this isn't going to be good?" Alex asked a look of concern washing over his face.

"It's not bad, but it does involve a pretty big change" he said, swallowing the lump that was forming in his throat. "Angela is going to move to LA after the tour ends and Rayanne's going with her" he paused trying to read the expression on Alex's face "I want to go with them and I want you to come with me"

"What about my work" Alex calmly asked, pulling his hands away from Rickie's.

"You could work from LA-you do most of your work from home anyway" Rickie answered biting nervously at the corner of his mouth.

"What about my family?" Alex asked, raising his voice a little.

"We could fly back every few months to visit" Rickie offered.

"I can't believe that you are springing this on me like this. It's like you already had the whole thing figured out and you just assumed I'd pack up my entire life and follow you without any hesitation." Alex pushed.

"It's not like I've been hiding this from you" Rickie attempted to defend himself "We just talked about this today, I'm talking to you about this as soon as possible"

"You're making a huge life decision for me with Angela and Rayanne. I love them, you know that I do, but I should have been involved in this conversation from the beginning not half way in" Alex argued.

"I don't know what you want me to say" Rickie answered his voice cracking with emotion "They are my life and they're going to be in LA"

"My whole life is in New York" Alex whispered bowing his head and leaning back against the booth.

"Except me" Rickie replied honestly "I have to go with them…I want to go with them."

"I don't know if I do" Alex answered honestly looking up with tears in his eyes as the waitress came to take their order. "We're not sure what we want yet" he spoke to her, his response carrying more weight then she knew as she walked away leaving them in silence.

….

Shane walked into his room to find Rayanne sleeping in his bed. Smiling to himself, he put his bag down and climbed quietly into the bed behind her, wrapping his arm around her and pulling her flush against his chest. She breathed in deeply, waking up and placing her hand in his.

"Hey" he whispered in her ear.

"Hey" she answered, closing her eyes again.

"Did you have a good time with Angela and Rickie?" he asked.

"Yeah" she nodded, turning so that she was facing him "I'm going to move to LA with Angela" she blurted out nervously, opening her eyes and attempting to read the look on Shane's face.

"When?" he asked yawning.

"After the tour…I'm assuming it'll be as soon as we sell our place and I can find a place I like" she answered, closing her eyes again suddenly feeling very awkward.

"You can stay with me until you find something" he offered, pushing the hair away from her face and gently kissing her forehead.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" she asked playing with the collar of his shirt.

"Why not?" he replied, "It's not like it would be permanent and it'll get you to LA faster besides, I'd be a pretty crappy boyfriend if I didn't offer" he answered sleepily.

"Boyfriend?" she replied with a small smile.

"I was hoping I could just slip that in without you noticing or throwing too big a fit about it" he blushed.

"That is not how you ask a girl if she wants to go out with you" she laughed.

"Do you want to? Be my girlfriend I mean?" he asked nervously.

"I don't know" she teased "I'm going to have to think about it"

"Rayanne-"he whined.

"I'm kidding" she laughed, snuggling into his chest "I think I do...want to be your girlfriend I mean"

"That was easy" he joked tightening his arms around her small frame.

"Don't get too cocky" she grinned "You should know things with me aren't always going to be this easy"

"It's all a part of your charm" he laughed "besides, you're worth it" he whispered.

…

Jordan stretched before wrapping his arms back around Angela, running his hands up and down her bare back lazily.

Angela sighed contently, kissing his chest softly before nuzzling her face in the crook of his neck.

"You're birthday's coming up" Jordan mumbled softly "do you want to do anything special?"

Angela shrugged her shoulders and kissed the side of his neck "I don't really care" she sighed, rolling over so she was lying on her back. "Something small with everyone…everything's been so crazy lately for everyone…it'd would be perfect to just be together and happy for a while" she smiled.

Jordan propped himself up on his elbow and looked down sweetly at Angela, sweeping her hair away from her face. "Ok, just let me know…we can do whatever you want Red"

"I haven't been a red head in years" Angela said, smiling up at him "You're gonna have to come up with a new name for me" she teased.

"You'll always be Red" Jordan smiled, leaning down and kissing the tip of her nose. Angela's eyes fluttered shut as Jordan moved his kisses down her face to her neck and then to her collar bone. She drew in a sharp breath when he gently kissed the spot on her stomach right above her belly button. He smiled slightly as she arched her back and tangled her hands in his hair. "Do you have any idea how sexy you are?" he growled making his way back up her body, following the blush that was slowly creeping up her cheeks.

"The things a guy will say to get in a girl's pants" she teased, hoping to take the attention away from her embarrassment.

"You're beautiful" he breathed, starring deeply into her eyes, not allowing her to avoid the compliment "You're the most beautiful girl I've ever met, and I'm the luckiest guy in the world to just be here with you right now"

"Alright Catalano" Angela giggled rolling them over so she was straddling his torso "You need to stop or I'm gonna get a big head" Jordan placed his hands on her waist and laughed softly at her joke.

"Ok, I'll stop for now, but I'm never gonna let you forget just how perfect you are. You're gonna have to just get used to it, you're about to be mine for the rest of our lives" he smiled, raising his eyebrows at her.

"Speaking of which" Angela added, lacing her fingers with his "We need to talk about a few things"

"Like what" Jordan asked, placing his right hand behind his head.

"Like the living arrangement for one" she answered "I think that it makes the most sense for me to move to LA. I've already talked to Rayanne and Rickie and they'd both be fine with moving too"

"Are you sure? I could move to New York too if it'd be better" Jordan offered.

"What about Caleb? Lindsay's entire career is there. And Shane hates New York. Plus, you guys already have your studio set up in your house-it'd just be easier for us to come to you" Angela stated simply.

"Well it looks like you've already thought of everything" Jordan teased, squeezing her hand "If you're sure that you want to do it then I'm ok with it. We could look for a new place if you want too, get something that's completely ours" he offered.

"I like your place, all it needs is a little bit of a woman's touch and it'd be perfect" she smiled.

"Have you been thinking about redecorating already?" he teased.

"Maybe" she blushed "nothing major…just a few coats of paint and a new bed spread…you know, little things"

"Babe, I'm just teasing. I don't care what you do…as long as you're with me I don't care what our house looks like" he said, pulling her back down beside him.

"Well in that case, I was thinking about bright pink…everywhere" she laughed, unable to keep a straight face.

"Oh, you think you're so funny" Jordan laughed along with her, tickling her sides causing her laughter to fill the hotel room.


	22. Chapter 22

**This chapter is a little sad I know, trust me it wasn't fun to write; but I really think that I like the way it turned out…let me know if you don't agree. Or if you do, let me know that too It's always so nice to hear what you guys have to say. As always, I hope you enjoy this chapter and I'll try and get the next one up soon…**

**Chapter 22.**

"I can't believe that you're not coming with us" Rayanne said with tears in her eyes "I don't know what we're going to do without you" she smiled, putting the last of Alex's shirts into the open box on his bed.

"You'll be fine" Alex smiled, taping the box shut and sitting down on the edge of the bed "besides, it's not like it's over…we just need a little bit of time to figure out how this is going to work"

"Do you think we're crazy" Rayanne asked, sitting down beside him "for moving to LA, I mean?"

Alex shook his head no, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and pulling her into his side "I think that it's incredibly brave, and I couldn't be more proud of you" he kissed her forehead.

"I'm going to miss you" she whispered, a tear finally escaping her eye and rolling down her cheek.

"I'm going to miss you so much" he whispered back, pulling her into a proper hug. "Promise me you'll take care of him" he pleaded.

"Hey, stop it" Angela whined, walking into the room with Rickie in tow "We promised that we weren't going to do this tonight. It's our last night in the apartment all together, it was supposed to be tear free until the morning" she said, jumping onto the bed behind them and throwing her arms around them.

"She started it" Alex joked, pushing Rayanne away and wiping at the tears in his eyes.

"Who'd of known I'd turn out to be the softie" Rayanne laughed along.

"Ok, we need to get out of here" Rickie spoke up from his spot in the doorway "I say we get dressed up and go out…we don't have to deal with this for another…12 hours" he said looking at his watch.

Alex stood up and walked over to Rickie, kissing him sweetly on the tip of his nose "Give me 10 minutes and I'll be ready" he said, pushing past him and heading towards the bathroom.

"How are you doing?" Rayanne asked Rickie cautiously.

"Ask me again in 12 hours" he said, never taking his eyes away from the direction Alex just headed.

….

"Do you think she'll need these?" Shane asked holding up a bag of cotton balls.

"What would she even use those for?" Jordan asked grabbing the bag and throwing them back on the shelf before pushing the cart down the next isle.

"I don't know, but they seem to have a ton of them over here, so apparently they're pretty popular" he shrugged following Jordan around the corner.

"If Rayanne really needs cotton balls I'm sure that she'll be fine coming and getting them herself" Jordan laughed picking up a few bars of soap.

"There's like a million different types of soap" Shane moaned, "how am I supposed to know what kind to get?" he asked holding up a bar in one hand and a bottle of liquid in the other.

"Get the one on the left, I think that's what Angela uses-it smells good" he answered. Shane shrugged and threw the bottle in the cart.

"What else do you think I need?" he asked, leaning on the handle of the cart.

"Pillows? You have two that are literally like lying on stacks of paper towels" Jordan teased, heading in the direction of the bedding section.

"Hey!" Shane laughed "I think I have three"

"Not much better man" Jordan laughed in response "I'm telling you, you need to have a few extra, and grab one of those blankets while we're here" he said, motioning to the end cap of blankets.

"But its August, it's still hot outside, why do I need extra blankets?" Shane questioned, looking at Jordan like he was crazy.

"Trust me, they're always cold" Jordan warned throwing a couple pillows in the cart "you'll thank me for this later"

"If you say so" Shane gave in, grabbing a folded up blanket and sticking it under his arm.

"I still can't believe that you two are going to be living together" Jordan said, grabbing a pack of pillow cases off the shelf.

"We're not living together-living together" Shane replied "She's just gonna be crashing with me for a little while, just until she finds a place on her own" he said casually.

"Still, doesn't it kind of freak you out? Just how fast it's moving" he asked.

"You're one to talk. You've only been back with Angela for like two months before you popped the question. If anyone needs a lecture on taking things slow it's you" Shane pointed out.

"Do you really think it's too soon?" Jordan asked, stopping in the middle of the isle to look worriedly at Shane.

"I don't know man" Shane answered awkwardly "I mean, I've seen you with her and I've seen you without her; and trust me, it wasn't pretty when she wasn't around. Besides, who am I to have an opinion on the matter anyway, this has been the longest relationship I've ever been in and it's only been two months. What do I know?"

"I love her" Jordan said matter of factly "I know that this is right"

"Hey, just forget I ever said anything" Shane shrugged, heading up towards the registers "don't let my stupid comment give you cold feet" Jordan followed close behind Shane, his mind in a bit of a fog.

…..

"A toast" Alex said, lifting his glass in the air "to the two most amazing women I've ever had the honor of calling my friends; I don't know how I would have ever made it through the last few years of my life without you. To Angela, you probably have the biggest heart out of anyone I've ever known; promise me that you'll love freely and honestly, and never let the world take it away from you" he smiled, clinking his glass against hers. "To Rayanne, my kindred spirit; be brave, and know that you deserve to be treated amazing and to have all the happiness the world has to offer" he clinked his glass with hers and wiped a stray tear from her cheek. "And you" he sighed, taking Rickie's hand in his "You saved my life and my heart will be going with you tomorrow" sniffing he pulled Rickie into a hug, continuing on low enough that only Rickie could hear "I'm so scared to be without you"

"This is so crazy" Rickie sobbed, clinging onto Alex's neck.

Angela grabbed Rayanne's hand, looking sadly into her eyes. There didn't seem to be any words at that moment that could sum up the emotions that were circling the table. Rickie pulled back slowly from Alex's embrace, keeping one hand in his and reaching the other across the table to grab Rayanne's free hand. Angela completed the circle, taking Alex's hand in hers. The four sat in silence, taking in the somber moment before the waiter interrupted their silence. Paying the tab, they slowly made their way out of the restaurant and on to the busy streets.

"So" Rayanne started, breaking the silence "I think that we should grab movie, some horribly bad for us junk food and head back to the apartment; sound good to you guys?"

"I think that sounds wonderful" Alex smiled, looping his arm through Rickie's. "We'll go grab the food if you ladies will get the movie?"

"Oh, get snow caps!" Angela smiled, starting to head in the direction of the movie store.

"And gummy worms" Rayanne added "but make sure they're worms, last time you guys got the bears and I don't like the bears"

"Raynie they're the same thing" Rickie laughed.

"No" Angela said looking at Rickie like he was crazy "one of them is a worm and the other is a bear" she scoffed.

"I'll make sure you get the worms love" Alex said, pulling Rickie along with him.

"I can't believe this is our last night in the city" Angela sighed as they walked along the street in the opposite direction of Alex and Rickie.

"I'm gonna miss it" Rayanne said wistfully, closing her eyes and breathing in deeply "but I'm excited about this new chapter at the same time"

"So are you ready, to like…move in with Shane?" Angela asked, smiling at her friend.

"I'm not moving in with him" Rayanne answered, rolling her eyes slightly "I'm…staying with him for a little while, there's a difference" she said, opening the door to the movie store.

"Ok" Angela giggled, entering the store and heading straight for the comedy section. "Call it whatever you want; but I think it's great"

"You do?" Rayanne asked, pretending to not care and picking up a movie to inspect the back.

"Sure" Angela smiled, taking the movie from her hand and putting it back on the shelf "I mean, I know it's a little out of your comfort zone, but I really think that Shane is good for you"

"It just feels like it's moving so fast you know" Rayanne said, biting her lip "I'm just afraid that I'm starting to need him too much"

"It's not too fast" Angela said, picking up a movie before heading towards the register "Me and Jordan, now that's fast" she joked, raising her eyebrows.

"Wait a minute," Rayanne started, "Are you kidding? I thought you were over the moon with him right now"

"Oh I am" Angela smiled, looking down at the ring sparkling on her finger "but I mean, it was a little fast right? And even though I know that I love him and I want to be with him for the rest of my life, part of me wonders if we're rushing into things"

"Angelika" Rayanne sighed, "There are few things in the world that I know to be certain. One, drinking doesn't answer your problems it only puts them on hold; Two, when playing poker with your friends, never bluff more than once; and Three, you and Jordan Catalano were always going to end up together, it was just meant to be"

"When did you get so smart?" Angela asked as they headed back out towards the apartment.

"I don't know, hanging out with you guys was bound to rub off on me sooner or later" Rayanne laughed, looping her arm through Angela's.

…

"Now boarding passengers in group A for flight 389 to Los Angeles …"

"That's us" Rayanne smiled awkwardly not moving from her spot.

"We'll see you soon" Angela grinned, pulling Alex in for a hug.

"It'll go by fast" Alex soothed, letting go of Angela and pulling Rayanne into a hug "We'll be back together before you even have the chance to miss us"

"Too late, I already do" She joked, pulling away and looking at Rickie.

"I've never spent more than day without you in the entire time I've known you" Rayanne stated, tears falling freely from her eyes "I don't think I'm gonna like this" Rickie engulfed her in his arms and kissed her check.

"Don't you dare make me cry again" he smiled, wiping away the tears from her cheeks.

"We'll see you soon" Angela choked out hugging him quickly before pulling away. "Take care of our boy Alex" she smiled. He nodded, putting his arm around his shoulder.

Angela and Rayanne walked hand in hand towards their gate, both turning just before they reached security to turn and smile back at them one last time, before disappearing around the corner.

"Why do I feel like this is the end?" Rayanne whispered, wiping at the tears on her cheeks.

"I know what you mean" Angela agreed "I don't know what to do next; how do we live our lives without them?"

"Maybe this is just some crazy dream, and we'll wake up in a minute and Rickie will be coming with us" Rayanne said, handing her ticket over to the stewardess and stepping into the gate.

"Who's dreaming, you or me?" Angela asked walking behind her.

"Me?" Rayanne guessed before Angela pinched her arm. "Ow! What was that for?" she asked rubbing her arm.

"Just trying to wake you up" Angela smiled apologetically. "Guess you're not dreaming"

Angela and Rayanne took their seats and both stared out the window until they felt the plane pull back from the gate and move towards the runway; thoughts of hours ago playing over in their heads like a broken record.

"_I need to talk to you guys" Rickie said that morning at breakfast. Angela looked up from the muffin she was picking at to meet the worried expression on his face. "I can't do this" he barely choked out._

"_Rickie" Rayanne soothed putting down her juice and taking his hand in hers "It's only going to be a few weeks before you see him again, and since we're not touring right now, there's tons of time for you both to fly back and forth" Rickie looked at her with a pained expression in his eyes. Angela drew in a sharp breath at the realization of what he was saying sunk in with her at the same time it did for Rayanne. "That's not what you mean, is it?" she asked, suddenly feeling all the air rush out from her lungs._

"_I just can't be without him" he sobbed "We talked about it last night, and I can still manage you guys from here; all the time that I was going to spend coming back for him I can just do for you. Then when you start touring again, I'll come along. I know it's not what we talked about, but I just can't be without him"_

"_I understand-"Angela started only to be cut off by Rayanne pushing back from the table and storming off to the other room. Rickie flinched at the sound of the door slamming behind her. Covering his face in his hands he let out a small sob. The pair sat in silence for a minute before Angela finally spoke again, "I understand, not being able to live without him; but I still feel like I've just been punched in the gut" she tried to smile, but it was like there were tiny weights keeping the corners of her mouth from moving up._

"_This is so unfair" he said, wiping at his face and reaching for a napkin "I feel like whatever decision I choose is going to be the wrong one. No matter where I go I have to give up someone I love; maybe I should just come with you" _

"_No" Rayanne said, emerging from the bedroom but stopping in the doorway to the kitchen. "I want you to stay; Alex makes you happy and you deserve to be happy. You've sacrificed so much to take care of us we should be able to do the same for you" _

"_Raynie" Rickie sighed, rushing to her and wrapping her in his arms._

"_How do I say goodbye to you?" Rayanne mumbled into his shirt._

"_Don't you dare" Rickie answered "I don't care how far apart we are, don't you ever say goodbye to me" he said, kissing the top of her head._

…..

"What time was their plane supposed to land?" Shane huffed impatiently next to Jordan.

"It's only five minutes late" Jordan laughed, tugging back the sleeve of his shirt to look at his watch "and it's only been a minute since the last time you asked"

"I hate waiting" he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and propping against the car.

Jordan shook his head and silently laughed at his friends little tantrum. Adjusting the glasses he had on he looked to up and down the side walk to see if he could spot the girls or Rickie. Just then he spotted the top of Angela's head coming out of one of the revolving doors to the right, slapping Shane on the shoulder and pushing off the car he headed in her direction. His smile quickly faded when he met her eye and noticed how red and puffy they were.

When Angela saw Jordan the tears that had dried up during the plane ride suddenly reappeared. Rushing towards his waiting arms they started falling freely again. "Baby what's wrong?" he asked nervously, looking over her shoulder at the similar sight of Rayanne wrapped up and crying in Shane's arms. "Where's Rickie?" he asked looking around and not finding him anywhere in sight.

"He's not coming" Rayanne answered, pulling back from Shane long enough to straighten the bag on her shoulder. Wrapping her arm around his and lacing her fingers with his she looked up sadly. "Can we go back to your place?" Shane nodded slowly, looking over to Jordan with a worried look in his eye.

Jordan walked Angela back to the car, opening the door and making sure she was in before shutting it behind her. "Want to go back to my place or do you want me to take you guys to yours?" he asked Shane after he'd helped Rayanne into the back seat.

"I think it'd be better just to go back to mine" he said nervously "I mean, I don't really know what to do right now, something tells me she's gonna want to just be alone a crash for a while"

Jordan patted him on the shoulder "Looks like you're catching on to this boyfriend thing pretty fast" he smiled quickly as Shane got in and shut the door. Sighing deeply Jordan rushed around the car towards the driver's seat and climbed in. Looking in the rear view mirror to see Shane comforting Rayanne was such a foreign yet familiar sight. Catching Shane's eye in the mirror they both smiled slightly before he turned his attention to Angela. Reaching over he squeezed her hand and mouthed an I love you when she looked up at him. Smiling weakly she repeated his sentiment before covering his hand with hers. He pulled away from the curb and headed in the direction of Shane's house.


	23. Chapter 23

**Hey guys…Here's the next one…I know there was some unhappiness with the last chapter, but I really feel like it was real emotions that the girls would have felt. Their entire world just changed without any warning and I feel like if they wouldn't have been upset it would have devalued everything that their relationships stood for. I just recently moved about 600 miles from my home state, and I can tell you that first day is really hard to get through. I hope you like this chapter better; they're settling in and figuring out where they're going to be headed next. I promise that I will revisit Rickie, but this chapter just didn't have room for him. Please let me know what you think…**

Chapter 23.

Rayanne's eyes slowly fluttered open and focused on a bottle of water sitting on the nightstand next to her. Sitting up slowly, she took the water and drank some; the cool liquid feeling great on her dry throat. Noticing her phone flashing she picked it up and read her message.

"Missing you already, but hope you're enjoying LA…tell Shaney I say hi…XOXO"

Rayanne smiled at Rickie's text message, quickly typing a response before laying her phone back on the nightstand. Realizing this was the first time she'd ever been in Shane's room she looked around, slowly studying the contents. There was a large painting above his bed, and a few framed pictures on the wall leading to his bathroom. Directly across from the bed was a large shelf with books, movies and a large TV. Getting up she inspected some of the titles, laughing slightly at some of the books. A large comfy looking chair sat in the corner facing a window that opened up to his back yard. She picked up the blanket that was tossed in the chair and wrapped it loosely around her shoulders. Turning to head out of the room her eye caught sight of a picture on the corner of the book shelf. It was a picture of Shane and Jordan, they couldn't have been more than 12, and they had their arms around each other's shoulders smiling brightly at the camera. Her eyebrows drew in tightly as she looked even closer at the picture; there in the background was a young Rickie and her, he was twirling her and she had the largest smile on her face. In the other corner she caught sight of Angela who was rolling her eyes at a young Brian Krakow. How funny, she thought, that all their lives they'd been intertwined but never knew the other existed until Jordan and Angela's paths crossed.

Wrapping the blanket tighter around her she shuffled out of his room and down the hallway. On each side of the hallway hung pictures of his travels; landscapes, people, buildings, some black and white, some filled with such bright colors it almost hurt your eyes just to look at them. She knew that he was always taking pictures, but she had no idea that he was this talented at capturing moments that seemed so meaningless and transforming them into such beautiful pieces of art.

She headed in the direction of the sound of the TV, still taking in the details of his house as she moved along. Turning the corner into the living room she smiled at the sight before her; Shane was sprawled out lazily on the couch watching an old episode of Sesame Street. She walked quietly over to the couch and climbed over him, wedging herself half on his body and half between the couch.

"Did you sleep ok?" he asked, shifting slightly so her body fit into his even better.

"Mmmhmm" she nodded yawning "Rickie says hi" she added almost as an afterthought.

"Did you talk to him?" he asked, twirling a strand of her hair lazily between his fingers.

"No, he'd texted me sometime while I was sleeping. How long was I out?" she asked, her finger tracing over the design on his shirt.

"About 16 hours, all your stuff got here this morning and I just had everything put in the garage for now. We can bring it all in later" her head shot up and she looked almost embarrassed "its ok" he chuckled, pulling her back down beside him "You've had a crazy couple of days; it probably did some good to let your body rest up"

"What have you been doing?" she asked draping her leg between his, her arm resting dangerously low at his waist.

"Just catching up on some TV" he replied, focusing on the small circles Rayanne was tracing on his stomach "I...uh…I didn't want to wake you…so I've just been…been hanging out here" he stumbled, closing his eyes as her leg moved painstakingly slow upwards, stopping just before reaching the newly forming bulge in his pants. Rayanne smiled at the change in this breathing, dipping just the tips of her fingers below the waistband of his jeans and moving them slowly from one side to the other.

"You could have come to bed with me" she purred softly moving so she was lying on top of him kissing at his jaw line.

"I didn't want to wake you" he breathed.

He tangled his hands in her hair, ignoring the sound of his phone ringing from the coffee table. "Answer it" she pushed, moving her attack to the other side of his face.

"Hello" he bit into the phone, arching his back as Rayanne shifted her weight causing her hips to grind onto his. "What? Yeah I guess…No she's fine…I'm sure that's ok" he said distractedly. Rayanne smiled as she moved slowly down his body, kissing and biting at his chest and stomach before sitting up and straddling his hips. "What? I don't know…." Pulling her shirt over her head she tossed it to the floor allowing Shane's free hand to caress her body. "Look J…I'm a little busy right now…" he started as Rayanne nodded in response, making quick work of unfastening his jeans "Better make it 4" he said quickly ending the call and tossing it on the table beside him. He sat up, holding onto Rayanne so that she was still straddling his hips he kissed her long and hard before pulling away and looking at her face.

"You are evil" he joked, pushing her hair off of her face. "Want to have dinner with Angela and Jordan in a little bit?" he asked reaching his hand behind her and unfastening her bra, kissing at her shoulder as the strap fell down.

Catching her bra before it fell all the way off she nodded, biting at her lip "I better go get ready then, thanks, this was fun" she flirted, attempting to move off his lap. He grabbed her by the hips, pulling her harshly back down to him. Ripping her bra all the way off he stood up in one swift movement, keeping her legs wrapped around his waist.

"I don't think so doll" he said moving towards the bed room "I bought us four hours and now you're gonna pay for that little trick you tried to pull while I was on the phone" he joked.

"But I have to shower" she fake pouted tightening her grip on him.

"If that's where you want it" he said pushing into his room and moving straight towards the bathroom. Rayanne laughed in response as he shut the door behind them, placing her on the counter he turned the shower on quickly before returning to her. Cupping her face he kissed her lips sweetly "It's good to see that smile of yours, you let me know if this gets to be too much…as happy as I am that you're here…if you need to go back I'd understand"

Rayanne bit at her lip, "I think I'm exactly where I need to be" she answered.

"Good" Shane smiled "Cause I was lying…I'd be lost without you here" he kissed her again, stripping them of their final pieces of clothing and carrying her into the shower.

…

"Babe, have you seen the box with all my shoes?" Angela yelled from the garage, moving from box to box frantically.

"Didn't you already bring that one in?" Jordan asked, appearing at the doorway between the garage and the kitchen.

"I thought so, but I'm missing like 15 pairs of shoes" she huffed, rummaging through a box of stuff she didn't recognize "Shit! I think this is Rayanne's…she probably has my other shoe box" Jordan laughed as she kicked the side of the box. "It's not funny" she pouted, storming into the house and back towards the bedroom stripping off the dress she was wearing.

"What's the big deal, just wear a different pair of shoes" he suggested, plopping down on the bed as he watched her pick through all the clothes she'd already hung in the closet.

"I can't wear different shoes, those shoes match that outfit perfectly" she huffed as she pulled out a different dress and slid it over her head. "I guess I'll just wear this one" she said looking disappointedly in the mirror. Jordan got up from the bed and stood behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Want me to drive over to Shane's and pick up your shoes?" he offered sweetly.

"No" she sighed, turning in his embrace and resting her head on his chest "I don't know why I'm being like this…I'm sorry"

"It's ok" he said soothingly "You've had a rough couple of days, and you haven't been sleeping well. Once we get you used to the swing of things out here you'll be fine" he said kissing the top of her head.

Angela felt the tears begin to well up inside of her. Pushing off of Jordan before they came she rushed towards the bathroom, turning on the faucet and splashing some water on her face. He was back at her side offering her a towel with a concerned look on his face. "Babe, what's wrong?" he asked.

"I don't know," she sighed walking back out towards the bedroom and sitting on the edge of the bed. Jordan followed close behind her, sitting down to the left of her he waited for her to continue on. "I just feel so lost right now; first Rickie didn't come with us, and I didn't think it was going to be this weird not living with Rayanne but the thought that she's not gonna be here in the morning is kind of freaking me out, and then…" she stopped herself, looking down at the ring on her finger and biting her lip.

"Then what?" he asked from his spot beside her, rubbing his hand up and down her back soothingly.

"I don't want to say it" she whispered.

"Ange please? I can't fix this if I don't know what's wrong" he begged, pulling her face so that she was looking in his eyes.

"I'm scared" she admitted, a tear rolling down her cheek "I know that this is what I want, but I just feel like everything is changing so fast and don't know how to deal with it. You seem so sure and confident, aren't you scared too?"

"A little" he admitted "but I know that I love you, and I want to start a life with you. Isn't that what you want?" he asked nervously.

"Of course" she nodded.

"No one's saying that we have to get married tomorrow; I want to do this right. I want you to have everything that you've always dreamed of, and if that means that we don't get married for another 50 years then fine by me. I just want you to be happy" he answered kissing her nose.

"I don't want to wait 50 years" she laughed lightly.

"Then we don't have to" he smiled "And Rayanne's just a few blocks away, and since Shane practically lives here most of the time I'm sure she'll be here so much you'll forget that you don't live together anymore" he joked.

"She was always a bathroom hog, it'll be nice not to have to battle it out with her for the shower in the morning" she smiled.

"I take five minute showers, and you know you're always more than welcome to join me if you think I'm taking too long" he suggested.

"How considerate of you" she smirked.

"Hey, water conservation is a big deal out here; in fact, I think that we need to make it a rule that we always shower together. For the environment, I mean" he said seriously.

"Anything for the planet" she smiled, resting her head on his shoulder "Thank you" she whispered.

"Anytime" he smiled wrapping an arm around her shoulder and kissing the top of her head "So you're good now?"

"I think so" she said in a small voice "except for one little thing" she said getting up and moving towards the closet. Jordan watched her suspiciously as she disappeared into the closet and came back out with the silk teal shirt that Caleb had given him in Vegas "I can't believe that you actually brought this back with you-it has to go" she joked as Jordan fell backwards on the bed laughing at the hideous shirt in her hands.

…..

"Stop it with the hands man" Jordan joked as Shane continued to tap out a beat on the edge of the table.

"What? You've never minded before" Shane smiled throwing one hand over the back of Rayanne's chair and placing the other in his lap.

"Yeah, well now that I know what that means it kind of freaks me out" he answered cocking an eyebrow in Rayanne's direction causing Shane to belt out a loud laugh.

"What does it mean?" Angela asked innocently.

"It means we had sex" Rayanne admitted bluntly cocking an eyebrow back at Jordan.

"Rayanne!" Angela exclaimed laughing at her friend's honesty.

Shane leaned over and kissed her temple before returning his attention back to his menu. "Oh come on Angel-food," Rayanne smiled "We all have tells"

"What's yours?" Angela asked looking at Jordan.

"Well, apparently I get all dreamy eyed and get this little spring in my step" he answered "And as you just learned, Shane here gets all twitchy" he added kicking Shane playfully under the table.

"Huh," Angela said drawing her eyebrows in together "What's mine?" she asked looking at Rayanne.

"You sing in the shower" Rayanne answered quickly.

"And yours?" she asked laughing at this newly learned information.

"She writes" Shane answered winking at Rayanne.

"I can't believe that I never noticed this stuff" Angela said, leaning back in her chair.

"So I guess you haven't started unpacking yet?" Jordan joked taking a sip of his water.

"No, but I've only been awake for like 5 hours" Rayanne answered "I'll probably be so wired when we get home that I'll get it all done tonight."

"You're lucky" Angela sighed "I've been sleeping like crap; but I have one of your boxes-want to come over tomorrow and pick it up?"

Rayanne nodded. "What's on your mind?"

"I don't know" she said leaning forward and resting her elbows on the table. Jordan and Shane had gotten into a conversation about something and weren't paying attention to the two girls anymore. "I think it's just the stress of everything; I hope that tonight works out better for me"

"Let's go out tomorrow," Rayanne suggested "we can drive around and try and find a new yoga studio, do a little shopping…maybe it'll help to just get you in a new routine"

"That sounds amazing" Angela agreed "So, how are things going so far?" she asked, lowering her voice a little.

Rayanne blushed and leaned forward mirroring Angela's position "Honestly, pretty amazing. Other than those first few hours, everything's been unfolding pretty perfectly" she smiled, looking at Shane out of the corner of her eye. He was laughing at something that Jordan said and this wave of calm just washed over her.

"It's pretty great, huh?" Angela smiled raising her eyebrows at Rayanne.

"What is?" she asked, picking up her water taking a long drink.

"Falling in love" Angela smirked, causing Rayanne to spit out her water.

"You ok babe?" Shane asked, patting Rayanne on the back as she coughed trying to regain her breath.

"I'm fine" she nodded "Just went down the wrong pipe" coughing a few times more she stood up from her chair "I'm just gonna go to the bathroom real quick" she said hurrying off.

"What was that about?" Jordan asked.

"I don't know" Angela lied, "I'm just gonna go check on her" she said following in the direction Rayanne had just fled.

"I'm sure she's alright" Jordan said, noticing the look of concern on Shane's face.

"I hope so" he said, shaking his head and turning back to Jordan. "So, its Angie's birthday next week right? What are you planning for her?"

"She said she just wanted something small and quiet, but I was kind of thinking that we could all go away for the weekend; have Rickie and Alex meet up with us somewhere. They're gonna have to begin work on their next album and we're gonna have to start publicity stuff for the tour soon, so these days of being together all the time are pretty numbered" he said picking at the food the waiter had just dropped off.

"I hadn't thought about that yet" Shane sighed "Man, if it ain't one thing it's another"

"What do you mean?" Jordan asked.

"Nothing," he said, but continued on when Jordan raised his eyebrows knowingly at him "It's just…I mean it seems like we just can't catch a break. As soon as I think we've found our groove, along comes some speed bump that throws everything off course."

"Come on, it's not like we won't be able to see them the whole time; part of the perk of them being in the studio while we're touring is that they can meet up whenever they want. I know it sucks, but you've gone longer without sex then this, you'll be fine." he eyeballed his friend suspiciously "Wait a minute…there's more to this than that isn't there?" Shane dipped his head embarrassingly, picking at the corner of the napkin that was sitting in his lap. "Well I'll be damned" Jordan whispered as Angela and Rayanne finally made their way back to the table.

"What's going on?" Angela asked sitting down and looking between Shane and Jordan.

"Nothing" Shane warned, putting his arm around Rayanne's chair "You better now?" he asked sweetly.

She nodded and smiled, letting herself relax back into his arm.

Later that night they all went for a walk in this secluded park by Jordan and Shane's houses. Rayanne and Shane led the way a little bit ahead of Jordan and Angela. His arm slung lazily around her shoulders, Angela felt for the first time completely content and confident in their decision to move to LA.

"You look happy" Jordan whispered, kissing her temple and pulling her in closer.

"I am" she sighed, lacing her fingers with his "You do that to me; and I'm happy for them" she said motioning to Rayanne and Shane. They watched as Shane said something that made Rayanne laugh, and then she took a hold of his hand as they continued on down the path. "They really are perfect for each other; I can't believe I never saw through all the crap that they used to give each other"

"You're telling me" Jordan agreed "I just hope this lasts, I've never seen him this happy" they watched as Shane twirled her under his arm, before she leaned up and kissed his cheek.

"It will; they deserve it" Angela agreed as they continued on.


	24. Chapter 24

**Big thanks to creceant, Gagirl29 and SpiceyGirl…it always makes writing better when I get some feedback. I know that this will probably be a little bit of a bummer for some, but I'm finding it much easier for me to write for Shane and Rayanne right now. I've kind of developed a fondness for these two, and I like giving them some depth; especially since Jordan and Angela tend to get all the love on these stories. Don't get me wrong, I love those two; I just hope you'll all hang in there while I play around with Shane and Rayanne for a little while longer. As always, please let me know what you think…**

Chapter 24.

"Awe look" Rickie gushed "They look so happy" he said holding the magazine up for Alex to see.

"Is he twirling her?" Alex smiled, pulling the magazine out of Rickie's hands and taking a closer look.

"I think it's sweet, of course she's probably going to have a fit when she sees this" Rickie joked pushing the cart down the next isle.

"Oh look, the article is called 'Double Date in the Park'…she's definitely gonna flip when she sees this" he laughed, following behind with his nose still pressed in between the pages.

"Do you want to have tacos tonight?" Rickie asked picking up a box of shells and looking at them uncertainly.

"Sounds yummy" Alex agreed "Jordan and Angela are such a good looking couple" he mused looking at the picture that was caught of the two walking hand and hand out of the restaurant. "So Mr. Manager, what's your next move?"

"What do you mean?" Rickie asked heading in the direction of the meats.

"I mean, both of their relationships have hit the world full force now, how are you going to go about dealing with it?" Alex asked.

"Well, fortunately I don't think we're going to have to do anything for Angela and Jordan, their relationship already has a very steady foundation" he started, stopping to grab a bag of cookies off the shelf. "As for Raynie and Shane; I don't know…I think it might be best to just let them deal with it on their own. If I try to control this situation too much for them it could just make things worse…maybe letting it be out in the open is the best thing for both of them" he said looking questioningly at Alex's smirk. "What?"

"Nothing" he smiled "We've just come a really long way in these last couple of months. I mean, if someone had told you three weeks ago that not only would we be living on opposite sides of the country but that you'd actually be taking a backseat in their lives, would you believe them?" he asked.

"Not in a million years" Rickie chuckled.

"Are you happy?" Alex asked stopping Rickie in the middle of the frozen foods.

"I'm better than happy, if that's even possible" Rickie said, taking Alex's face in between his hands.

"Thank you for staying" he whispered. Rickie smiled and threw his arm around Alex's shoulder as they continued on through the rest of the supermarket.

…

"That one wasn't so bad" Rayanne said walking out of the yoga studio they'd be recommended to by Lindsay. "I mean, it's no MiMi's, but I think it has potential" she said referring to they're favorite studio back home.

"I liked the feel of it; it was very calming" she said yawning and stretching as they headed towards their car.

"Still didn't sleep good?" Rayanne asked as she climbed into the driver's seat.

"No, I slept great last night; I'm just still really tired" she answered relaxing back against the seat.

"Well, I didn't sleep much at all" Rayanne said, looking behind her to check for cars before she pulled out into traffic.

"Eww Rayanne" Angela whined.

"What? Not like that, perv" Rayanne joked adjusting her sunglasses into place "Although we did have a perfectly lovely time this morning" she added wiggling her eyebrows suggestively "I meant that I just had a lot on my mind and I couldn't fall asleep."

"Thinking about how much you looove Shane" Angela teased.

"No, I was thinking about finding a place of my own; a few ideas I have for some new songs; I think I might be interested in starting a line of jewelry; I think I want to get a dog…" Rayanne trailed off.

"And you weren't thinking about Shane at all?" Angela questioned innocently.

"Shut up" Rayanne fake pouted "It's all your fault you know" she joked lightly.

"How is it my fault?" Angela asked in mock offense.

"Because you're the one who put that thought into my head. I was perfectly happy and you had to go along and drop the L word" she said, still not able to say the word even to Angela.

"I was just teasing Rayne" Angela started "But do you think you are? Falling for him I mean?" she questioned cautiously.

Rayanne chewed on the side of her lip for a long while thinking about her answer to that question. Did she love Shane? Or if she didn't yet, was she starting to? Something about answering that question out loud scared her, because if she was being completely honest with herself she already knew the answer. Turning her attention to Angela as she pulled into a parking space in front of the restaurant they were meeting everyone at and turned off the car.

"I don't know" she answered quietly.

"I think you do" Angela said, a little hurt that Rayanne wouldn't confide in her. Getting out of the car, she headed in without waiting for Rayanne.

….

"I think Cancun sounds great man" Caleb agreed munching on the chips at the center of the table.

"Totally" agreed Lindsay, sighing deeply and closing her eyes "Three days on the beach sounds amazing"

"Well I guess she's sold" Shane joked sipping at his drink and looking towards the door to see if the girls were there yet.

"Never thought I'd live to see the day that Shane Lewis was completely whipped by a girl" Caleb joked tossing a chip at Shane to bring his attention back to the table.

"Come on, leave him alone" Jordan chuckled, patting Shane on the shoulder.

"I'm not whipped, maybe I'd just rather hang out with her than you" Shane teased back.

"Awe and I thought we had something special" Caleb poked back.

"I hate to break it to you babe" Lindsay said pulling Caleb into her side "But from the looks of all the pictures circulating; you didn't stand a chance" he fake pouted until she pushed him away.

"What pictures?" Jordan asked pulling out his phone to check for messages.

"The ones of you guys being all cutesy on your date" Lindsay laughed as Shane pulled out his phone to check the pictures out himself.

"Fucking vultures man" Shane whispered as he found the pictures she was talking about almost instantly.

"How in the hell did they even see us?" Jordan asked scrolling through the pictures himself.

"Are you kidding?" Caleb asked sarcastically "It's LA, they're a whole different breed out here. You guys need to just get used to it"

"Get used to what?" Angela asked finally joining the group, placing a kiss on Jordan's lips as she sat down beside him.

"Did you know about these pictures?" he asked leaning over so that she could see them as well.

"Yeah, Rickie and Alex texted us this morning letting us know about them" Angela said, a chill running down her body causing her to shake a little "It's freezing in here" she commented rubbing her hands up and down her arms.

"Are you getting sick?" Jordan asked as he put his phone down and wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer to him. Angela shrugged her shoulders and leaned into his embrace as Rayanne finally made it to the table. The pair eyed each other for a second before Rayanne mouthed "I'm sorry" and Angela nodded and mouthed back "Me too". Smiling, Rayanne took her seat next to Shane, grabbing menu and burring her face in it.

Shane leaned close to Rayanne and whispered something in her ear causing her to giggle softly. Turning her head slightly her smiled faded for a split second as she met his eye; he kissed her temple and turned his attention back to the group and that's when she knew for sure. She had fallen completely in love with him.

"I need to go to the bathroom" she blurted out, standing up abruptly causing everyone to look at her strangely. "Angela, Lindsay-let's go" she ordered, rushing off to the bathroom without waiting for the girls to respond.

"I guess we're going to the bathroom" Lindsay said with a hint of question in her voice.

"Guess so" Angela said, shrugging at Jordan's questioning look as she followed behind Lindsay in the direction that Rayanne had just taken off too.

"Man Shane, what did you say to her?" Caleb laughed at the completely bewildered look on Shane's face.

"I don't know man, girls are so weird sometimes" he muttered, scratching his head.

Rayanne locked the door to the girl's room as soon as Angela and Lindsay had made it inside. Moving over to Angela she began swatting at her arm repeatedly. "This is all your fault" she loudly whispered.

"Ow, Rayanne" Angela laughed trying to move away from her friends attack "What has gotten into you?"

Rayanne moved to the sink and turned the faucet, allowing the water to come rushing out at high speed. Splashing some on her face, she grabbed a paper towel and dried off. Lindsay looked questioningly at Angela who was still completely unsure of what was going on.

"So," Lindsay said awkwardly trying to break the silence that had fallen over the room "Not that I don't love a little girl time, but you maybe want to let us know what's going on in here?"

"I'm in love with Shane" Rayanne blurted out like she was ripping off a band aid.

Lindsay squealed in excitement and then covered her mouth trying to hide the smile that had formed on her face. Angela smiled brightly and pulled Rayanne in for a hug. "That's great Raynie, but how is this my fault?" she questioned.

"Cause you're always questioning everything and making me think about things…this is so bad" she sighed scrunching up her nose and pushing out of Angela's embrace.

"How is love a bad thing?" Lindsay questioned.

"Because it's too soon" Rayanne answered "I thought I'd get some sort of warning first, but it just hit me when we were sitting out there. He made some dirty joke and when I looked at him it just hit me like a ton of bricks; what am I supposed to do now?" she asked plopping down on the chair in the corner.

"No one can say it's too soon but you" Angela started rationally.

"We've only been dating for a few months" Rayanne stated.

"True, but you've been sleeping together for years. It's not like you don't know anything about him, and besides the two of you have been through some pretty hard stuff not just with me and Jordan but with each other. It's not weird that you've figured this out already" Angela reasoned.

"Ok, but that still doesn't answer my question" Rayanne pointed out.

"About what to do now?" Lindsay asked moving over and leaning against the wall. When Rayanne nodded she continued on "You tell him" she said like it was a simple as that.

"I can't tell him!" Rayanne exclaimed standing up from the chair and starting to pace again.

"Why not?" Lindsay smiled "He's completely gone for you too"

"You think?" Rayanne asked stopping dead in her tracks and smiling for a brief moment before shaking herself out of it and sitting back down. "I can't, not yet"

"Raynie, no one can tell you what to do now" Angela spoke softly "If you aren't ready, then that just means that it's not the right time. You'll say it when you are, and trust me it's not as scary as it seems"

"Thanks guys" Rayanne smiled standing up and pulling them both in for a hug.

By the time they made it back out to the table the guys were already on their second round of drinks and the food had just arrived.

"I ordered you the street tacos" Shane said raising his eyebrow to see if she approved.

"Thanks" Rayanne smiled, leaning forward and kissing him softly on the lips "They look great"

"Did you ladies have a nice time in the bathroom?" Caleb joked poking Lindsay in the side.

"Yes we did" Lindsay laughed pushing away Caleb's hand.

….

"I'm never eating another taco again for as long as I live" Angela moaned, coming out of the bathroom and crawling into bed next to Jordan.

"Do you need me to get you anything?" he asked concerned, pulling the covers up over her.

"No, I think it's all done now" she said softly closing her eyes and rolling onto her stomach.

Getting up from the bed Jordan quietly walked to the bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet. Pulling out some medicine and heading back out, he hurried off to the kitchen to grab some water. When he got back he sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing this hand softly on her back until her eyes fluttered open.

"I've got some medicine and water here for you; do you want to take it?" She nodded and sat up next to him, swallowing the pill and sipping at the water. Jordan felt her head with the back of his hand as she sniffed and put the water down. "Well, you feel a little warm, this is probably why you've been so tired lately" he said soothingly.

"I'm sorry" Angela whimpered tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"What are you sorry for?" Jordan chuckled tucking some stray hair behind her ear.

"I don't know; I just feel bad that I've been here less than a week and nothing seems to be going right" she said dipping her head to avoid his eyes.

"You're wrong" he said bringing her head back up "you're here and we're together, everything is perfect"

"You're too good to me" she smiled stroking the side of her face.

"Yeah, I'm pretty awesome" he joked causing her to giggle. "Come on, let's go curl up on the couch and watch a movie" he said grabbing the blanket off the bed and leading her out of the room by her hand.

…..

Loud giggles could be heard erupting from the living room at Shane's house that night. Once the pair returned from dinner they grabbed some wine and beer and camped out in seclusion, watching TV and making out.

"That's not fair-" Rayanne laughed trying to reach over Shane and grab the remote back from him.

"I don't care about being fair, we're not watching that" Shane laughed tossing the remote over her and catching it with his opposite hand.

"Please?" She said with a playful pout on her lips.

"Put the puppy eyes away, this is a man's house; we are not watching that movie" he joked pulling her hood up over her head. Shaking the hood back off, she sat up and moved to the opposite side of the couch, crossing her arms over her chest. "What are you doing? Get back over here" he smiled motioning to the empty space beside him. Rayanne shook her head slowly no, reaching for her glass and taking a long drink. "You think that's gonna work?" He asked cocking his eyebrow at her.

Without a word Rayanne unzipped her hoodie slowly, licking her lips and biting down seductively on the bottom one. "I don't care how hot you think you are, I'm not gonna change the channel" he said tearing his eyes off her and taking a swig of his beer.

"Shaney" she whined, sitting up on her knees and shrugging the hoodie off of her shoulders "Please?" she said softly, crawling back over to him, taking the bottle from his hand and placing it on the coffee table. Turning back towards him she pushed his t-shirt up kissing at his stomach and chest as the fabric moved higher. He sat up pulling the shirt over his head and in that instance she grabbed the remote from beside him, changing the channel back to her movie and then tossing the remote into the chair on the opposite side of the room.

"Oh, you think you're clever don't you?" he smiled starting to get up, only to be pushed back down before she laid her body on top of his in attempt to weigh him down. "You do realize that you weigh like 20 pounds, this isn't gonna stop me from getting up" he said placing his hands behind his head and looking amusingly at her.

"But I'm so comfy" she smiled snuggling deeper into him, tracing her hand slowly up and down his chest "You wouldn't want to move now, would you?" she smiled when she felt his muscles contract under her touch. "Just watch this one movie with me, I promise it won't hurt your manly image. In fact" she said as she started kissing at his jaw line "I think it will make you incredibly sexy" she whispered landing her kisses on his mouth.

"Fine" he grumbled "but you so owe me after this". He settled into the couch pulling the blanket off the back of the couch and covering them as the movie started to play.

"I think I want to get a dog" he said about halfway through the movie as the main character was greeting his dog. "Rayne?" he said, looking down at his chest when he didn't get an answer and noticing she'd fallen asleep. Smiling, he slowly moved so that he was out from under her. Grabbing the remote, he turned the TV off. Moving around quietly, he cleaned up the empty bottles and turned off all the lights. He picked her up softly, attempting to do so without waking her and carried her back towards the bedroom and laid her under the covers on the bed.

Crawling in on the other side he felt her curl up next to him. He lay there for a while, listening to the sound of her steady breathing. Kissing the top of her head he closed his eyes, "I love you" he whispered before falling asleep beside her.


	25. Chapter 25

**Hey guys…sorry for the delay of this chapter; finals are over (finally) and I've been getting ready to head out of the country for my sister's wedding. As always thanks to creceant for the review last chapter (and all the others) I'm glad that you like the interaction between Shane and Rayanne; hope you enjoy them this chapter as well. Luvjordan, thanks so much for your kind words about my writing style, hope you feel the same about this chapter as well. To everyone else who is reading, hope you enjoy; and as always please let me know what you think…**

**Chapter 25.**

"Babe, do you have everything?" Jordan hollered up the stairs at Angela as he came back in from taking his bags out to the car.

"I think so" she answered, coming down the stairs with a bag slung over her shoulder and another pulling behind. Jordan took the stairs two at a time and met her half way, taking both bags from her and kissing her sweetly on the lips before turning and taking carrying the bags down.

"Alright, well let's get going" he said stopping just before reaching the door "I almost forgot-I packed some snacks but I left them on the counter, can you run grab them for me while I load these?" He asked turning and rushing out front.

"Why did you pack snacks? There's gonna be stuff on the plane-" Angela started as she made her way into the kitchen, stopping in her tracks when she saw a small present wrapped in a bow sitting on the counter. Moving towards the counter she picked it up and held it in her hands, a small smile playing on her face as she stood there staring at the gift.

"Well, you gonna open it or what?" Jordan asked from his spot in the door way of the kitchen.

"What is this?" Angela asked smiling back at him.

"Part of your birthday present" Jordan grinned moving towards her "I thought the bow would have given it away" he joked.

"I thought this trip was my present" she stated wrapping her arms around his neck and standing on her tip toes to meet his eye.

"Will you just open it and stop giving me such a hard time" he smiled as she playfully rolled her eyes and dropped her hands from his neck. He watched patiently as she unwrapped the small box and slowly opened it like she was afraid it was going to bite her.

Angela drew in a sharp breath when she finally saw the contents of the box. Leaping forward she wrapped herself securely around his body causing him to stumble slightly at the sheer force. He let out a small chuckle and held on to her tightly. "I take it you like it?" He asked already knowing the answer.

"I love it" she said pulling back and looking closely at the necklace. "Put it on me?" she asked handing him the box and turning around, lifting her hair off her neck as she waited. Jordan fastened the necklace securely in place and kissed the back of her neck softly.

"Happy Birthday baby" he whispered in her ear.

"Thank you" she smiled, turning around and kissing him forcefully. Jordan tangled one of his hands in her hair, and wrapping the other around her waist to pull her in closer. The pair tumbled backwards, colliding with the table and knocking some papers to the ground.

Picking her up, Jordan placed her on the table before climbing up and continuing his attack on her. Angela was making quick work at his shirt when his phone began to vibrate in his pocket. "Shit" he groaned burring his face in the crook of her neck, the sound of Angela's rapid breathing resting on his ear.

"Do we gotta go?" She half moaned shifting under the weight of Jordan's body still resting on top of hers.

"If we want to make the plane then yeah" Jordan chuckled, sliding off Angela and pulling her into a sitting position on the edge of the table.

"Thank you for this beautiful necklace" she softly spoke circling her arms around his neck and staring into his eyes.

"You're welcome" he smiled, letting his hands rest on her hips. Jordan began moving closer, his eyes focusing on her lips that were just begging to be kissed. He could almost taste her when his phone began buzzing again. "Let's get going before Shane loses his mind" he said, leading her out of the kitchen and towards the car.

….

"Still no answer?" Rayanne questioned from the passenger seat of Shane's car.

"Nope" he said, tossing his phone into the center console "This is your fault you know" he teased pulling slightly at the braid that was falling over her shoulder.

"How do you figure" she asked dryly pushing his hand away.

"Well if you hadn't distracted me this morning then we would have gotten out of the house on time" he answered simply, turning the corner finally able to see the airport at the end of the road.

"Distracted you? I don't know what you're talking about" Rayanne smirked, turning her head and looking out the window.

"Sure you don't" he smiled reaching over and taking her hand in his. "Are you excited to see Rickie and Alex?"

Rayanne smiled and nodded, her hand playing with the watch on Shane's wrist. "I'm excited to get to spend some time with everyone; I mean you guys are gonna have to leave soon and it'll just be me and Angela for a while…" Rayanne trailed off leaning back and turning her head towards Shane.

"You gonna miss me Graff?" he joked pulling into a parking spot and looking at Rayanne who was rolling her eyes playfully.

"Of course I will" she said honestly "but not nearly as much as you're gonna miss me" she giggled, climbing out of the car and heading towards the trunk.

Shane caught up with her and wrapped his arms around her from behind. Resting his chin on her shoulder he whispered in her ear "I'll be thinking about you ever minute I'm gone"

Rayanne turned in his arms and rested her cheek on his chest. She could hear his heart steadily beating, and the slow rhythm of his breathing was soothing to her. "Shane?" she said softly.

"Yeah baby" he answered.

"I need to tell you something" she said nervously, holding on tighter when Shane tried to pull back to look her in the face. "I think…I mean I know…I-" she started only to be cut off by the sound of a car honking and pulling up a few spaces down from them.

"Oh sorry man" Jordan hollered down at Shane "Were we interrupting something?"

"I swear Catalano" Shane mumbled kissing Rayanne on the forehead "What were you saying?"

"Nothing, it can wait until later" she smiled opening the trunk and reaching for her bag only to be cut off by Shane grabbing it first.

"I got this, why don't you and Angie go check us in, I'm gonna go kill Jordan" he joked.

"Happy Birthday Angelika" Rayanne gushed when she caught up with Angela on their way into the airport.

"Thanks Raynie" Angela smiled "So what was that love fest all about?" she teased nudging her with her hip while they waited in line at the check in desk.

"I'm so lame" Rayanne sighed rubbing her face with her hands "I almost said I love you for the first time in a parking lot"

"I'll kill Jordan for interrupting that" Angela gasped, narrowing her eyes and crossing her arms over her chest.

"Don't kill him, I want to hug him…when I do say it to Shane I want it to be special" she said softly "I was just caught up in the moment and almost got carried away. Let's just get on the plane and celebrate your birthday" she said trying to brush it off.

"I'm so ready to be lying on the beach" Angela smiled, helping to change the subject.

"I'm ready to see you in that little bikini of yours" Jordan whispered in her ear, wrapping his arms around her from behind as he and Shane made it inside with the luggage.

"Get a room you two" Shane teased pulling Rayanne into his side and walking up to the counter with her.

"Oh, I fully intend on taking full advantage of our room" Angela teased back, turning in Jordan's arms and kissing him on the lips. "I hope you don't mind spending a little bit of time alone with me this weekend" Angela said smiling against his lips.

"I should take you away more often" he smiled kissing the tip of her nose.

"Ok you two" Rayanne interrupted pulling the two apart "Try and keep it in your pants until we actually get there-if I have to watch you do this on the plane I might just get sick" she smiled as Shane took her hand and led her towards the gate.

"This is gonna be fun" Jordan joked, cocking his eyebrow and smirking as he grabbed their bags and followed behind them.

…..

"So I take it she liked the necklace" Shane said to Jordan from across the aisle. They had been in the air for the last hour and both girls had fallen asleep almost as soon as the plane took off. Rayanne's legs were propped up in Shane's lap and her head was resting on his shoulder.

Jordan looked down at Angela who had her back resting against his chest with his arm slung lazily across her chest. "Yeah, she seemed really happy" he mused.

"I'm glad we went on that tour" Shane said rubbing his hand up and down Rayanne's legs.

"It worked out pretty good for you huh?" Jordan smiled looking up and meeting Shane's eye.

"Yeah it did" he chuckled "but that's not what I meant-I mean that I'm glad it worked out for you. The two of you deserved this chance to make everything right again" he said smiling lightly at his friend.

"I don't know how she found it possible to forgive me…but I'm glad she did" Jordan responded slouching down a little in his chair.

"She loves you" Shane stated simply looking at Rayanne still sleeping peacefully beside him "When you love someone, nothing else matters" he said more to himself then to Jordan.

"You gonna tell her soon?" Jordan asked smiling at his friend.

"I've said it about a million times in my head, and it seems so easy" he said "but I'm just so afraid of scaring her off that I can't get the words out"

"It'll happen when it's right" Jordan said calmly. Smiling he continued on "You remember what a wreck I was before I said it to Angela for the first time; and then after I said it I couldn't even remember what I was so nervous about"

"You at least knew that she loved you back" Shane pouted.

"Don't pull that on me" Jordan said mock rolling his eyes "You know she does, I know she does, hell-I'm pretty sure that the flight attendant knows she does"

"I know" he sighed "but does she know she does?"

….

"It's so beautiful here" Lindsay moaned from her lounge chair next to Angela on the beach.

"Mmhmm" Angela agreed, shifting and turning over in her chair to lay on her stomach.

"I say we buy a house here and never leave" Rayanne agreed, closing her eyes and soaking up the feeling of the warm sun on her skin.

"No objections from me" Angela sighed closing her eyes and smiling lazily.

"So how are you guys settling in; do you like LA?" Lindsay asked turning over to lay on her stomach as well.

"As soon as things fall into a normal routine I think I'm gonna love it" Angela said opening her eyes and looking at Lindsay "Being with Jordan is amazing and that's what matters"

"I'm having a great time" Rayanne smiled opening her eyes and watching Shane throw a football around with Jordan and Caleb.

"Have you started looking for a house yet or are you just gonna live with Shane?" Lindsay questioned, propping up on her elbows so she could see Rayanne.

"I haven't started yet" she said taking her eyes off the boys and looking over at Lindsay "they're gonna be leaving soon anyway-I kind of want to spend as much time with him as I can right now"

"Why do you even need a house of your own?" Angela questioned turning her head towards her "You know that you two would just end up spending every night with each other anyways-it kind of seems like taking a step backwards if you ask me"

"He's never asked me to stay" Rayanne answered simply.

"Since when has Rayanne Graff needed permission to do anything?" Rickie asked coming up behind the girls. Rayanne squealed, jumping up from her chair she threw her arms around Rickie and wrapped her legs around his waist as he laughed and spun her around. "I've missed you too Raynie" he joked.

"Hey Vasquez keep your hands off my girl" Shane joked joining the group and sitting down on the edge of Rayanne's chair.

"Sorry Shane, but I was his girl first" Rayanne joked, slipping out of Rickie's hug and sitting down on Shane's lap so Rickie could sit on the chair with them.

"I can live with that I guess, as long as your mine now" Shane whispered low in her ear causing her to smile and snuggle further into his arms.

"How was the flight?" Jordan asked slipping into the chair behind Angela.

"Really long" Alex sighed "but we're here now, and I'm just ready to relax" he said grabbing Angela's drink and taking a sip.

"We got sat next to a baby" Rickie explained rubbing Alex's shoulders.

"A very loud, cranky baby" Alex emphasized, rubbing his temples.

Rickie smiled apologetically. "Happy Birthday Ange" he chuckled.

"So I've got reservations for dinner tonight, but other than that nothing was really planned out" Jordan interrupted "What do you say we get some rest and then meet back up at 6?" he asked receiving a communal nod from everyone in the group.

"Thanks again for this trip" Angela said wrapping her arms around Jordan's neck once they were back alone in their room.

"Anything to see that smile of yours Red" Jordan grinned dipping his head to kiss her on the lips.

"I don't know about you" she said in between kisses "but I'm not really tired"

"Me either" he agreed, as his hand made its way to the tie on the back of her top.

"Whatever are we gonna do until 6?" Angela smiled with fake innocence.

"I plan on doing you" Jordan answered untying her top and pulling her down towards the bed. Angela laughed, shaking off her top and rolling so Jordan was on top of her.

"I love you" she said looking deep into his eyes.

"I love you too" he said brushing her hair back and away from her face.

"Let's get married as soon as we get back" she said letting her hand run down his back.

"We only have two weeks before I have to leave for the tour-is that enough time for you?" he asked.

Angela nodded her head in response. "I don't want to wait any longer; I want to be your wife now".

"Whatever you want" Jordan answered dipping down and kissing her "all you have to do is say the word and I'll make your dreams come true"

"You're my dream" she moaned as Jordan began nipping at her neck "I just want to belong to you forever"

"Then we'll do it as soon as we get back" Jordan moaned against her neck.

…

"I'm back" Rayanne yelled into the room closing the door behind her. She'd spent the last hour with Rickie catching up and eating lunch, and now she was just ready to curl up in bed and take a quick nap before they had to start getting ready for Angela's dinner that night.

Shane was sitting on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands and his phone sitting in pieces on the floor beside him.

"Baby? What's wrong?" Rayanne asked moving towards the bed and cautiously sitting down beside him.

"I'm so sorry" he whimpered, wrapping his arms around her waist and laying his head in her lap. Rayanne looked worriedly at him trying to understand what this could all be about.

"You're kind of scaring me Shane" Rayanne whispered. After a few moments of silence Rayanne continued on "Please tell me what's going on" she begged.

Shane loosened his grip a little and took a few deep breaths, trying to figure out the best way to start this conversation. Sitting up and wiping at the tears in his eyes he reached over, taking Rayanne's hand in his and pulling it over to his lap, never taking his eyes off their now joined hands he started the conversation.

"I got a call from our publicist just a little bit ago" he started. Rayanne was desperately searching his face trying to figure out what was coming next. "Back on the tour, after you told me about the Mikel thing I was really mad and upset" Rayanne's breathing began picking up pace "I thought that you were just playing with me and didn't care about me at all; I just felt so stupid, like you had tricked me or something"

"Shane, that's not-" Rayanne started to interject, but was cut off by Shane standing up and moving to the other side of the room. Propping himself against the dresser he continued on.

"I know that's not what it was now, but I didn't at the time. And I just wanted to punish you I guess, make sure you knew that I was able to just forget you that easy" Shane chuckled at how stupid it all seemed now "I went out and met up with some random girl at some random bar; I swear nothing happened…she tried and I wanted nothing more than to just forget you for a second, but nothing happened"

"I don't understand" Rayanne said, standing up and moving towards Shane, hating the distance that was growing between them.

"She's apparently pregnant and trying to pin it on me. She wants some insane amount of money in order to keep quiet about it" he said, reaching for Rayanne and pulling her towards him "I don't care about that, if that's what it'll take to make this all just disappear-"

"No" Rayanne interrupted "We're not giving her a dime" she said pushing off Shane and heading for her bag that she left on the counter when she came in.

"Baby, it's just money, as long as it doesn't affect you I'm fine" Shane argued following behind her.

"It's not just money" Rayanne countered, searching her bag for her phone "I love you but I'm not just gonna stand by and let you take the fall for someone else's kid in hopes to protect us" Rayanne said distractedly while texting Rickie.

"What did you just say?" Shane asked a smile starting to form on his face.

"Huh?" Rayanne asked continuing to text "I said I don't care about the money"

"Not that part" he said taking the phone from her hands and wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Oh" Rayanne blushed, suddenly realizing what she had just blurted out. "I, uh…I wanted that to be more special…I've been trying to figure out how or when, but I just couldn't find the right moment, which is stupid I guess, cause how are you supposed to know when the right moment is…and I was just afraid I guess that it was too soon, and I understand if you don't feel the same, I mean it's pretty early and-" Rayanne's rambling was cut off by Shane's lips crashing against hers.

"I love you too" Shane said once he finally pulled away.

"You do?" Rayanne asked shyly biting her lip and wrapping her arms around his neck.

"How could I not?" Shane asked kissing her nose "You're a real game changer Graff; I was dead in the water that night in the tent after graduation, I think part of me has always been in love with you" he said wiping away a stray tear that had fallen from her eye.

"Me too, I was just too scared to admit it" she said softly leaning into his touch.

"So what do we do now?" Shane asked relieved that this was finally out in the open.

"Well, first we're gonna text Angela and let her know we're going to be a little late for dinner" Rayanne said reaching for her phone and starting to text.

"Why are we gonna be late?" Shane asked playfully.

"I'd tell you, but I think it'd be better if I just showed you" Rayanne said shutting her phone and slowly pulling her shirt over her head, looking at him over her shoulder on her way towards the shower.

"I was always better at visuals" Shane teased pulling his shirt over his head and following her into the bathroom. Shane wrapped his arms around her from behind after she'd gotten the shower turned on. "I love you" he said again, nestling his head in her neck and inhaling her scent.

"I love you" she replied, relieved at how good those words felt.

"Want to work on the visuals of that" he flirted, running his hands down her stomach and unfastening her jeans. Rayanne giggled and turned in his embrace, stripping off her jeans and reaching for the button on his.

"You're a game changer too you know" she said pushing his jeans off his hips and letting them hit the floor.

"Looks like we're pretty perfect for each other then" he grinned stepping into the shower and pulling her in behind him.


End file.
